| Disc 1 | ||||||
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| 1. |
| 2:40 | 
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Naughty boys in nasty schools
Headmasters breaking all the rules Having fun and playing fools Smashing up the woodwork tools All the teachers in the pub Passing 'round the ready-rub Trying not to think of when The lunch-time bell will ring again. Oh what fun we had But, did it really turn out bad All I learnt at school Was how to bend not break the rules Oh what fun we had But at the time it seemed so bad Trying different ways To make a difference to the days. Headmaster's had enough to-day All the kids have gone away Gone to fight with next-door's school Every term, that is the rule Sits alone and bends his cane Same old backsides again All the small ones tell tall tales Walking home and squashing snails. Oh what fun we had But, did it really turn out bad All I learnt at school Was how to bend not break the rules Oh what fun we had But at the time it seemed so bad Trying different ways To make a difference to the days. Lots of girls and lots of boys Lots of smells and lots of noise Playing football in the park Kicking Pushbikes after dark Baggy trousers, dirty shirt Pulling hair and eating dirt Teacher comes to break it up Back of the 'ead with a plastic cup. Oh what fun we had But, did it really turn out bad All I learnt at school Was how to bend not break the rules Oh what fun we had But at the time it seemed so bad Trying different ways To make a difference to the days. Baggy trousers, baggy trousers, baggy trousers Baggy trousers, baggy trousers, baggy trousers |
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| 2. |
| 3:10 |
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Received a letter just the other day, Don't seem they wanna know you no more, They've laid it down given you their score, Within the first two lines it bluntly read. You're not to come and see us no more, Keep away from our door, Don't come 'round here no more What on earth did you do that for? Our aunt, she don't wanna to know she says, What will the neighbours think they'll think, We don't that's what they'll think, we don't, But I will, 'cause I know they think I don't. Our uncle he don't wanna to know he says, We are a disgrace to the human race he says, How can you show your face, When you're a disgrace to the human race? No committment, you're an embarrassment, Yes, an embarrassment, a living endorsement, The intention that you have booked, Was an intention that was overlooked. They say, stay away, Don't want you home today, Keep away from our door, Don't come 'round here no more. Our dad, don't wanna to know he says, This is a serious matter, Too late to reconsider, No one's gonna wanna know ya ! Our mum, she don't wanna to know,she says, I'm feelin' twice as old, she says, Thought she had a head on her shoulder, 'Cause I'm feelin' twice as older, I'm feelin' twice as older. You're an embarrassment |
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| 3. |
| 2:08 |
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I am the bringer of your wishes,
Your saviour from doing work, The washer of your dishes,and You'll still get you mid-day perk. Estate agent, Your mansion and pot of gold, All the home comforts, Before you're getting tired and old. One more try, Try to get what you've never had, Five more bob, For the whole world that can't be bad. We can't all win, Look it's happening, The future's looking not so bleak, A thousand winners every week. A thousand winners every week. So when you hear me coming, Along halls and up the stairs, Get the black teapot, In the cupboard, under chairs, Forget all your wives tales, Or forecasts and dividends, E.R.N.I.E. feels vibrations, Only pays out to trusting friends. One more try, Try to get what you've never had, Five more bob, For the whole world that can't be bad. We can't all win, Look it's happening, The future's looking not so bleak, A thousand winners every week. A thousand winners every week. Keep your hand on the bottle, And your eyes glued upon the set, When the score cards come up, Could be you for the big one next. Publicity, no thank you, On the front page of the currant bun, They think you stink, But in the pub you'll be number one. One more try, Try to get what you've never had, Five more bob, For the whole world that can't be bad. We can't all win, Look it's happening, The future's looking not so bleak, A thousand winners every week. A thousand winners every week. A thousand winners every week. A thousand winners every week |
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| 4. |
| 3:32 |
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That was a close escape, have to get a new hobby to relate.
Something less conspicuous, won't take up too much time, something less energetic, for what I've got in mind. I won't be too persistant 'cos I'm not that way inclined. See, that's the one for me. Look under "Collins" see if she's free. Sweaty fingers find 5p 4151683 "Hello Miss Collins you'll not know me. I'm in the undies buisness, see? Please please can you tell me the size; how far from the knee?" Oh dear dear, me luck is running thin. I'll take another name I might have a win. What? 2 more points? I hope no one fills it in. See, that's the one for me. Look under "Dickens" CFG. See if she'll speak to me. Hand's get shakey eye's can't see. Having trouble find 5p 2171983 "Hello Miss Dickens you'll not know me, I'm in the undies buisness, see?" Feel more relaxed now here we go again. Hoi! No temporaries I've heard most take me in. Oh dear dear me, that is the one it fits. So please please can you tell me the textured fit feels good to me. In the naked mood, try to grin and bear with me. Please don't think me rude, I only hear don't want to see. See, that's the one for me. That was quick, too quick for me. Of that I can see, wash me laundry oh bugger me! Sugar or milk with your tea? No I couldn't, well I'll see. What's your hobby? Just the same as me, see you soon for tea. I'll give it one last chance I think you'll all agree. I'm getting nowhere here, on my last 5p. I'm sick of waiting for ages nothing interests me. I'll ring another number, make sure it's a she. Here we go again, I'll give it 3rd degree. |
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| 5. |
| 2:43 |
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She says he's gone away on a short holiday
He won't be back for awhile The twleve from the bench stood up And hesitated he'll be leaving right after this trial Circumstance, evidence who can cheat providence He wished he could go back again A flick of the wrist He wished that he missed Not guilty is all he can say Pass 'round the gossip now Let's wait and see Pass 'round the tray now Let's have some tea My boys haven't seen him He's been working away Don't bother asking he's not home today Not home today T-shirts and badges With free tickles and smudges In the end you'll believe what you feel When ten hands are aiming And no-one is complaining In a sense it could be more real |
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| 6. |
| 3:04 |
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Up I rush off to work Hello Fred you look half dead and Are you coming are you going I could never do a double shift (Allo Fred get some bed Fred) Hello Steve long time no see I like the Stones still on the thieve Bet you ain't half seen some time In your short-lived life of crime (By the way, have you got the time ?) On the beat Pete Wiv me size ten feet I wander up and down the town For me that's a treat The beauties of the city and Everything's sweet For me that's a treat 'Cos I'm on the beat Pete Swing my truncheon merrily Try to teach the blind to see Move a lady for a seat Tourist find a sight to see Mingle with the crowd I wonder if they're proud Yes, that would be a treat 'Cos I'm on the beat Pete... beat Pete Hello Snowball, you still drunk ? Here have a smoke, anyone for lunch ? A printed person of last week's times Seen a lot of stars and moonshine (Spare you a dime ?) On the beat Pete Wiv me size ten feet I wander up and down the town For me that's a treat The beauties of the city and Everything's sweet For me that's a treat 'Cos I'm on the beat Pete Swing my truncheon merrily Try to teach the blind to see Move a lady for a seat Tourist find a sight to see Mingle with the crowd I wonder if they're proud Yes, that would be a treat 'Cos I'm on the beat Pete... beat Pete Hello Bun been down the oven ? What's the rate for a single person ? Is it good, is it sad ? You look unhappy it must be bad Hello May been a busy lady All work and no time for play Still it's the life you chose I suppose Good luck to you come what may ! Skip-a-di-do-da-days ! On the beat Pete Wiv me size ten feet I wander up and down the town For me that's a treat The beauties of the city and Everything's sweet For me that's a treat 'Cos I'm on the beat Pete Swing my truncheon merrily Try to teach the blind to see Move a lady for a seat Tourist find a sight to see Mingle with the crowd I wonder if they're proud Yes, that would be a treat 'Cos I'm on the beat Pete... beat Pete Beat Pete(x 7 |
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| 7. |
| 2:19 |
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Shake it mister And a sister too I'm gonna make ya boogie woogie Gonna rattle in your shoes Boogie with me baby (Boogie boogie) Oh won't ya boogie with me baby (Boogie boogie) Oh won't ya boogie with me baby we'll flip the whole night through (Oh but listen to me baby) Come on baby won't ya do it right You can boogie with me baby and you know I'll hold you tight move on over and a (watch this) That's the way to do it honey It ain't the twist won't you Boogie with me baby (Boogie boogie) Boogie with me baby (Boogie boogie) Boogie with me baby we'll flip the whole night through (Swing it on that Joanna) (Yeh July 4th) (Oh) (Chrissy Boy pick it !) Well I got the boogie the boogie got me, I'm so gone I hap-happy Won't ya boogie with me baby(Boogie boogie) Boogie with me baby (Boogie boogie) Boogie with me baby we'll flip the whole night through, Let's take it over there over there,over there, Well, the boogie is a-comin' Over there, there, there. I said I got the boogie (I got the boogie) Boogie with me baby (Boogie with me baby) I said I got the boogie (I got the boogie) Boogie with me baby (Boogie with me baby) I said come on and flip the whole night through. I said boogie with me baby we'll flip the whole night through I said come on over baby we'll flip the whole night through. I'm a real solid gone Yeah |
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| 8. |
| 3:26 |
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How come he enjoys himself not me? (I don't know) How come she smiles a good morning to me? How do they make a hard day's work easy? Tell me something I'll put it to the test Take hold of yourself and you will see How lucky we are to be free, Now you take for granted, Life and country. How come he jokes with friends but not me? How can she sing out of tune not me? How do they find time for kids on Sunday? I can't express uncalled for agress, You're in one-way traffic can't you see? Before a head-on crash steer free, When if it's too late, Don't come and cry to me. How come they get on with but not me? How can they walk arm-in-arm happily? How does that old boy dance down the street? Tell me something I'll put it to the test, Take hold of yourself and you will see, How lucky we are to be free, Now you take for granted, Life and country. How come we never get on you and me? How can we find out the remedy? How does that old lady's home look neat? How does that old lady's home look neat? How does that old lady's home look neat? |
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| 9. |
| 1:59 |
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I walk through Camden town in the evening,
strolling silently and hardly breathing. Footsteps behind me slightly quicker, the corner of my eye a shadowy flicker. I wonder if he's after my soul again tonight. Stops to whisper with the shadows but still keeps me in his sight. I shout at passing strangers but they don't seem aware, don't want to get involved in my spiritual affair. Tonight my fears are growing worse and worse. I feel him brewing up an evil curse. I sense a chill creep up my spine I want to scream but only whine because I know it can't be true mind's gone now legs it's up to you. I wonder if he's after my soul again tonight. Stops to whisper in the shadows but still keeps me in his sight. I shout at passing strangers but they don't seem aware, don't want to get involved in my spititual affair I try to accept him as my partner. He still makes cold his manic laughter. But every time I try to turn around he throws my fears and makes no sound he stirs them to the ground. Acheing muscles, puff and pant I run. To stagger home and hide behind my mum. But even when I'm safely in my bed. I know that he is waiting in my head. I wonder if he's after my soul again tonight. Stops to whisper in the shadows but still keeps me in his sight. I shout at passing strangers but they don't seem aware, don't want to get involved in my spiritual affair. |
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| 10. |
| 2:59 |
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Walls signed with autographs, Ceilings full of echoed laughs, Something's disappear. Gurus on roller skates, Capital for swinging fetes The area is to be cleared. A stab in the back, the smoke and the black As it smoulders to its grave. Disappear with the fun and the fear Another chance to misbehave. Organ tinkling organ, Marriage planning children, Spinning, round and round. rusty swings and roundabouts, Disco's full of layabouts, Nowhere to be found. A stab in the back, the smoke and the black As it smoulders to its grave. Disappear with the fun and the fear Another chance to misbehave. Come on then we'll go down there, Let's see the local ash tray, Let's see if we can be happy, We'll mess about just you and me, I must try to make it home before tea. Walls signed with autographs, Ceilings full of echoed laughs, Something's disappear. Gurus on roller skates, Capital for swinging fetes The area is to be cleared. A stab in the back, the smoke and the black As it smoulders to it's grave. Disappear with the fun and the fear Another chance to misbehave. A stab in the back, the smoke and the black As it smoulders to its grave. Disappear with the fun and the fear Another chance to misbehave |
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| 11. |
| 3:45 |
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Door Locked Open, Door Locked Shut
See you soon, hopefully not I've been and gone so many times Without a work I've dropped no lines Just look Forward, Never Back Selfish bastard, dicta-brat Please forgive me For the things that I've done Don't feel ashamed If you're asked hows your son Living here and living there Lived at home but very rare To see your faces it would be a treasure locked in memory Do drop a line, say hello dad I await your answer, for I also beg Please accept me From a baby I have come Pain, distress and heartache I have now overcome Running here and running there Often caught but never cared Been a-courting every year |
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| 12. |
| 2:44 |
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There is such confusion in my mind, To play your illusion is so unkind, I didn't know who you were this afternoon, You said that it didn't matter and I'll see you soon. Standing here in the rain, Maybe the weather will change again, Change again or stay the bleeding same. How I met you in the first place I'll never know, But now I think I know you you're telling me to go, ho, ho, You said you'd be back you told me to wait here just in case, But then you never arrive and I'm waiting outside your place. Standing here in the rain, Maybe the weather will change again, Change again or stay the bleeding same. Standing here in the rain, Maybe the weather will change again, Change again or stay the bleeding same. There is such confusion in my mind, To play your illusion is so unkind, I didn't know who you were this afternoon, You said you said that doesn't matter I'll see you soon. Standing here in the rain, Maybe the weather will change again, Change again or stay the bleeding same |
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| 13. |
| 2:34 |
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You said you're leaving, well that's ok, You said you've had enough, what can I say ? I suppose I'll be sad for a week or two, But in the end, it's the same for me and you, We'll both be sorry through and through. You said you're leaving, well that's ok, You said you've had enough, what can I say ? I suppose I'll be sad for a week or two, But in the end, it's the same for me and you, We'll both be sorry through and through. Me and you. You must stop doing this, you've got to change, 'Cos you hold all the cards, you've got range, Every time you go away, I think of you. You said you're leaving, you said this, You said, you said that, You said you don't want to see me no more, You said you don't want me to come to your door, You said, you said, I suppose I'll be sad for a week or two, But in the end, it's the same for me and you, We'll both be sorry through and through. Yes you do. You must stop doing this, you've got to change, 'Cos you hold all the cards, you've got range, Every time you go away, I think of you |
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| 14. |
| 2:04 | 
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