| Disc 1 | ||||||
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| 1. |
| 3:29 | 
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crickets rhythmically sing
their mournful melodies a monotone by request but they fail, they fail to soothe the mess hands rhythmically grope the sheets again for you and off-rhythm the time slows to make moments eternal moments eternal is this some kind of holy test to stitch the treadmarks off my chest to get up walk outside my head on a holy search for angeltread the moon within its ball washes white the darkened wall with a milky veil of silk and i see, i see the spirits lilt now i've lost my fear so i pray that you come near with a million sparkly lights and help me, help me through the night is this some kind of holy test to stitch the treadmarks off my chest to get up walk outside my head on a holy search for angeltread the milky prints of spirits near i pray that they have lost their fear a million wisps of sparkly light weaving through the walls is this some kind of holy test to stitch the treadmarks off my chest to get up walk outside my head on a holy search for angeltread |
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| 2. |
| 3:51 |
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Well I'm staring straight into the face of hell
You're so close and you can't even tell I'm so wrapped up inside Because I don't have much to love Horrified I feel from pits unseen Falling off my pedestal of plentiful deeds As it crumbles down on top of me I contemplate my lack of love Come and save my soul Before it's not too late I'm not afraid to admit How much I hate myself All these gongs and cymbals ring inside my head |
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| 3. |
| 5:04 |
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Deep inside the darkest night
Is drinking in the light From pinholes pricked Holy needles knicked In a canopy of white I'm alone, I'm alone And I?m beating my soul to make it bleed a drop of hope Then I?ll drink it up in a golden cup and let it grow inside And I fear that you've gone away But you must be somewhere near The fire fades so the deepest shades Slowly trickle down the wall In a room I hide will I come outside And have some kind of fall All my words, all my words They have lost all their worth Nothing's good enough for anyone And the look on my face Leaves a subtle trace of the change That is to come |
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| 4. |
| 5:06 |
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I breathe the mist
Floating about the stars I can caress With velvet hands I breathe the mist Floating within, without this pen This pen between my fingers Messiah I know you are there Within, without me Holding me Messiah I know you are there Catching, carrying This beautiful mess Escape the pain Within a room somewhere Escape the pain So deep inside the soul I have no key No map to find |
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| 5. |
| 4:03 |
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Tonight the lamplight swirls and glistens
Melting itself upon my face I'm hanging my silhouette near the shoreline I'm swimming underneath in the noontime Will I ever know what's wrong with me Will I ever see your hand again in mine Tonight the rain is pelting rooftops There is no fire to melt the cold I'm straining to hear a human whisper And I'm painting images on the soft stone Now I'm drinking alone Amidst these figures of stone I'll raise the glass once again Then lay my head on the pillow |
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| 6. |
| 5:04 |
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I see the wonder setting in
Over where I am going And where I've been And by the way when I kneel to pray It never seems you're there And I'll admit that I do not try When it's easier to sit down and cry I'm so full of doubt Want to let it out Let it out all over you On my circle of error I go round and round On my circle of error I go round and round again I'm running things into the ground All the truth I am seeking has not been found And I am weak All the words I speak Bring no passion anymore And will I try for happiness In the midst of all this emptiness All I want is you If I only knew How to get up off this floor |
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| 7. |
| 4:03 |
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White ribbon
Wedding gown She walked into the garden What has she found Oh sorrow Untold sorrow There would be no groom She left him as she Found him Empty inside But this time it was Much too late Nothing to hide Oh her soul Never left the garden Black ribbon Long black gown She's walking through Her memory She's so alone |
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| 8. |
| 4:20 |
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These things which I so often wonder
This need to create myself Frustration forgotten through slumber It's there when I wake Defeated before I rise I'd pull myself out of his mire If I could collect my strength Or muster an ounce of desire Finding the words, and making them mine Is there somewhere I could seperate this feeling from memory Disconnect myself from me? Desire inside to mistreat you It pushes words out of my mouth This cyclical pattern I feed you The back and forth, and up and down But still here you are Behind this veil of pious revelation I'll close my eyes and look for worth inside I don't deserve you Relinquishing hope for the future I try not to hate it so But you are a bridge to those memories I try to forget, if you only knew Is there somewhere to occupy emotion A room to keep my rage away from you? Just tell me when these hopeless days are over I'll open my eyes and see my new sun rise I don't deserve this |
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| 9. |
| 3:11 |
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I only want what's mine
That's what I came to find A little respect that's all From you Because one has his natural right But somehow that doesn't seem right Not when I look at myself I was taken on a trip to see A miniscule menagerie in my soul Where all the thoughts have escaped the cage And vamp across the spiritual plain It's like I said before I've got the right to ignore The ruin in my self If it involves change And so I lay it down Put my humanistic crown On the shelf I think I've changed my mind I'd rather seek than find The sorrow from you I won't regret |
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| 10. |
| 4:22 |
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Hey I am having a little trouble
Again with myself Today I would label out of the ordinary Hey I read The words to label him Said he strikes a tune mighty fine But in living life that's where he finds Plenty of trouble Hey I am A book inside your hands Will you turn the page and read the line Where I reach the end and rid my mind Of all this rubble Let me out Of this solitude I want out So I can be with you Let me out I want to touch you Don't keep me here Hey I am Having a little trouble with myself |
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| 11. |
| 3:42 |
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Drifting away from you
Spinning down to the pinpoint drop of isolation In a spell Walking away from the fire That keeps my heart From turning ice Golden feet grace the surface of the sea Sinking deeper I view them from underneath Flailing kicking as I head for the deep I question a hypothetical lead supper Oh God receive my outstretched hand Will I inhale the blue Spinning down upon the glass A ghost towards realization of a cell Enclosing the hauntings of a past That blind the eyes And rust the heart So I fell I need you to take my hand And keep my heart from ice |
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| 12. |
| 3:25 |
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I've wrapped myself up
In a universe again And let the darkness quell My matchflame confidence And unwillingly I hide The lever I must find To release the deep The tears withheld inside But I can't explain I can't make sense of the Things I'm saying The crystal tears Are sliding down again Your moonlit cheeks And soaking silken lips If this pain is so real There's a hand that someday must heal And give us the words That time steals and won't let us say |
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