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I went to a party at the local county jail
All the cons were dancing and the band began to wail But the guys were indiscreet They were brawling in the street At the local dance at the local county jail Well the band were playing And the booze began to flow But the sound came over on the police car radio Down at Precinct 49 Having a tear-gas of a time Sergeant Baker got a call from the governor of the county jail Load up, load up, load up with rubber bullets Load up, load up, load up with rubber bullets I love to hear those convicts squeal It's a shame these slugs ain't real But we can't have dancin' at the local county jail Sergeant Baker and his men made a bee-line for the jail And for miles around You could hear the sirens wail There's a rumor goin' round death row That a fuse is gonna blow At the local hop at the local county jail Whatcha gonna do about it, whatcha gonna do Whatcha gonna do about it, whatcha gonna do Sergeant Baker started talkin' With a bullhorn in his hand He was cool, he was clear He was always in command He said "Blood will flow; Here Padre you talk to your boys..." "Trust in me - God will come to set you free" Well we don't understand Why you called in the National Guard When Uncle Sam is the one Who belongs in the exercise yard We all got balls and brains But some's got balls and chains At the local dance at the local county jail Load up, load up, load up with rubber bullets Load up, load up, load up with rubber bullets Is it really such a crime For a guy to spend his time At the local dance at the local county jail At the local dance at the local county jail Whatcha gonna do about it, whatcha gonna do Whatcha gonna do about it, whatcha gonna do |
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Do the Wall Street shuffle
Hear the money rustle Watch the greenbacks tumble Feel the Sterling crumble You need a yen to make a mark If you wanna make money You need the luck to make a buck If you wanna be Getty, Rothschild You've gotta be cool on Wall Street You've gotta be cool on Wall Street When your index is low Dow Jones ain't got time for the bums They wind up on skid row with holes in their pockets They plead with you, buddy can you spare the dime But you ain't got the time Doin' the.... Doin' the.... Oh, Howard Hughes Did your money make you better? Are you waiting for the hour When you can screw me? 'Cos you're big enough To do the Wall Street Shuffle Let your money hustle Bet you'd sell your mother You can buy another Doin' the.... Doin' the.... You buy and sell You wheel and deal But you're living on instinct You get a tip You follow it And you make a big killing On Wall Street ------------- Lyrics Powered by LyricFind Written By STEWART, ERIC/GOULDMAN, GRAHAM <i>Lyrics © EMI Music Publishing</i> |
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Gonna meet you on the corner
Gonna take you out of town Out to where the grass is greener And no one can be found Gonna be there in the morning Gonna take you by the hand Gonna get out of the city Gonna get back to the land Waterfall, and it's fallin' down on me Waterfall, and it's fallin' down But it ain't gonna let me be Gonna be there in the morning Gonna take you by the hand Gonna get out of the city Gonna get back to the land Waterfall, and it's fallin' down on me Waterfall, and it's fallin' down But it ain't gonna let me be Hey, Waterfall Hey, Waterfall Hey, Waterfall Hey, Waterfall |
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I got me a job on the local paper
Everybody there thinks I'm nice But they'd better look twice 'Cos it isn't me I wanna be Headline hustler Scandal maker Headline hustler Money taker You keep writing me letters But I haven't got time I'm busy looking at photographs But they'd better not be from the BBC You're gonna hear from me Headline hustler Scandal maker Headline hustler Money taker Better not turn around I'll stab you in the back And you don't know what I'm hiding Under my plastic mac, under my plastic mac I got a very good friend in the CIA And he says that he never takes bribes But he's telling lies 'Cos he's into me He knows I wanna be Headline hustler Scandal maker Headline hustler Money taker If your brother's wearing dresses And your neighbour's swapped his wife Well, I'm gonna make the headlines With your private life With your other wife Headline hustler Scandal maker Headline hustler Money taker Headline hustler Scandal maker Headline hustler Money taker |
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Down on the casting couch
A star is gonna be born A star with the stature of a Harlow Who's doomed And groomed to enrapture All her co-stars, and stuntmen, the co-stars Oh, let there be lights, action, sound Lights, action, sound - Roll 'em! Out in the mezzanine On the arm of a dumb marine Her beauty looks out like a trailer Norman Mailer Waits to nail her He's under the bed And he's waiting for her to be dead He's out on the patio With his polaroid and scenario And he's armed and he's dangerously.... Close was the weather When I was a kid She gave me a feather from her gown To cool me down, to cool me down And I was the galley slave Who lost his heart when the ship went down Lights, action, sound Roll 'em I had a part in the talkies When you were a little girl I've taken Lassie for walkies When she was the pup that Vaudeville threw up And destiny lead her Hand in paw to somewhere In Hollywood That's crazy, a dog up in Beverly Hills Crazy, crazy La, la, la, la, la.... (You better lie low) |
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Oh Donna
You made me stand up You made me sit down, Donna Sit down, Donna Sit down You made stand up Donna waiting by the telephone Donna waiting for the phone to ring Oh Donna You make me break up You make me break down, Donna Break down, Donna Break down You make me break up Meanwhile waiting by the telephone Donna is waiting for the phone to ring "Hello, darling Yes I love you darling Yes I love you" Oh Donna You made me stand up You made me sit down, Donna Sit down, Donna Sit down You make stand up Donna I'd stand on my head for you Oh my love, my own one Oh my love, my own one Donna waiting by the telephone Donna waiting for the phone to ring Oh Donna Oh Donna Oh Donna Oh Donna Donna I love you |
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So say one and so say all
Say what you gotta say Or don't say nothing at all You been tossin' and turnin' through soft sticky nights While the Bronx below you fights to stay alive So say one and so say all Be what you gotta be Or don't be nothing at all Be gracious to your mother When you leave this neighbourhood The change is going to do her good Next to me you look bad 'Cos there ain't no fresh air for my momma, my momma But the drop is shear When you break away Take me away It's just about time to hit the road And say You gotta believe in something It's easy to see My God is fading away So pick up your bible and pray for me We're all alone in the darkness But our eyes are wide open We don't see nothing And our hands are tied To the railings of the Bowery And the humid city slickers So say one and so say all We had a lot to say And we said it all The cost of living in dreams Is rising like a crime wave The American way of dying And it gets you every time And it looks like it's got to my momma My momma May she rest in peace |
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Johnny don't do it
Johnny don't do it Johnny don't do it Johnny don't do it Johnny was an angel, an angel dressed in black He used to hang around the guys down at the local track He tried so hard to join them But they always turned him back Johnny don't do it (He was an angel) Johnny don't do it (Such an angel) He was only seventeen, just got out of school He stole a bike from Joe's garage to prove that he was cool He didn't know that the brakes were worn And fate can be so cruel Johnny don't do it (He was an angel) Johnny don't do it (Such an angel) Johnny don't do it Johnny don't do it Johnny don't do it Johnny don't do it Well, Johnny went a riding With his girlfriend on the back seat Looking for some action And they found it down a back street Suddenly a truck pulled out He tried to step on the brake Johnny don't do it (Here is a news flash) Johnny don't do it (Today, Johnny Kowalski, also known as Johnny Angel) Johnny don't do it (And his young fiance Francine, were tragically killed) Johnny don't do it (In a cycle accident) Don't do it, don't do it (Any witnesses please contact) Don't do it, don't do it (The police at Precinct 29) Now Johnny's with the angels, the angels in the sky I wonder if he thinks of us as he goes riding by If only had listened, oh, the number of times we tried To tell him Johnny don't do it (He was an angel) Johnny don't do it (Such an angel) Johnny don't do it (He was an angel) Johnny don't do it (Such an angel) Johnny don't do it Johnny don't do it Johnny don't do it Johnny don't do it (Repeat) |
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Hey toots, you put the life into living
You brought a sigh into sight Ah hon, you make my legs turn to water You bring the stars out at night But they ain't half so bright As your eyes Gee whiz, you take the beauty out of beautiful You play the strings of my heart Oh babe, you take the wonder out of wonderful Oh my, oh my, and my, if you were mine The rain would turn to sweet sweet wine Well he's been up all night Breakin' his head in two to write A little sonnet for his chickadee But between you and me I think its sssssssssssilly. Silly Ooh treas, you got a smile like a Rembrandt Aha, you got the style of a queen Oh dear, you are the petal of a rosebud Next to you all the others could be weeds You're the only one my garden needs Ooh, you know the art of conversation Must be dying Ooh, when a romance depends on Cliches and toupees and threepes We're up to here with moonin' and junin' If you want to sound sincere - Don't rely on Crosby's croonin' - Take a little time Make up your own rhyme Don't rely on mine 'Cos it's sssssssssilly - silly - silly - silly |
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I looked in the mirror
(What did you see looking at you) I saw a nine stone weakling (What will you do) Dynamic tension waiting for you Dynamic tension make a man out of you I opened my magazine (What did you see) I saw Mr. France (What did he have) A girl on each shoulder (What else) And one in his pants Dynamic tension can do this for you Dynamic tension make a man out of you you you you you So our hero goes down to the beach He's in real terrible shape His chick's been seen with big Alex That mother kicked sand in his face Now let me tell you about Alex He's got Hands like hams Knees like trees 200 lbs Of surfboard Hercules Mr. Atlas won't you bring her on back to me I lost my girl down by the beach She's with Alex, and she's out of reach So please Mr. Atlas won't you bring her on back to me I saw your body in an advert on T.V. But what convinced me was your money back guarantee Now I'm stronger than Alex (Where is he now) He's left in disgrace (Oh yeah) Cause I took back my girlfriend (Ha, ha, ha, ha) And kicked sand in his face (In his eyes, in his ears, in his nose) Dynamic tension waiting for you Dynamic tension make a man out of you Dynamic tension, Dynamic tension Dynamic tension, Dynamic tension Dynamic tension, Dynamic tension |
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One fine day I started writing home
One finds It's so hard To make it It's gotta be the right time It's gotta be the right kind line It's gotta be the mainline It's gotta be It better be So let it be One fine day |
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Nobody sends me birthday cards
Nobody brings me flowers I'm just here for operations I've been out for hours When I come to I'll wet my bed 'Cause when I get mad I sink so low As matron knows I get off on what you give me, darling I get off on what you give to me Yeah, I get off on what you give me, darling I get off on what you give to me And when I go to that seedy ward up in the sky You'll be waiting with a hypodermic needle and a graph Here comes the dark (I'm grateful for my anaesthetic) Out goes the spark (Delirious and apathetic) When I come to I'll wet my bed And when I get well I'll take revenge I'll wreak my wrath On all blood donors and their sisters Visiting time and flowers When sister brings that bedpan 'round I'll piss like April showers I get off on what you give me, darling I get off on what you give to me Yeah, I get off on what you give me, darling I get off on what you give to me (Repeat) And when I go I'll die of plaster casting love |
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Where are my boys?
They are in deepest water Where are they now? They are over the hill and far away But they are broken men who lie low Waiting for miracles Old men of rock and roll Came bearing music Where are they now? They are over the hill and far away But they're still gonna play guitars On dead strings, and old drums They'll play and play to pass the time The old wild men Old wild men Old wild men, waiting for miracles Lord have mercy upon the many Lord have mercy upon the few Lord have mercy upon the many Lord have mercy on me and on you |
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It's one thing to know it but another to admit
We're the worst band in the world But we don't give a.... If Garbo played guitar with Valentino on the drums Then we'd be nothing more than a bunch of darma bums So tune up, tune up Well we've never done a days work in our life And our records sell in zillions It irrigates my heart with greed To know that you adore me Up yours, up mine But up everybody's that takes time - But we're working on it Working on it (Ooh) We never seen the van - leave it to the roadies - Never met the roadies - leave them in the van All because of circumstances way beyond control We became the darlings of this thing called rock and roll, ooh Here I am a record on a jukebox A little piece of plastic with a hole, ooh Play me Buy me and you play me then my plastic turns to gold Here we are together on your hi fi A little piece of plastic with a hole, oh Fade me, fade me, fade me, fade me..... |
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I got a bee in my bonnet
Got a chip on my shoulder I got a hole in my shoe And my toes are getting colder I got ants in my pants I got fries in my thighs I got a bone in my nose I got frit in my ass I got a bee in my bonnet Got a chip on my shoulder I got a flee in my ear I wear my heart on my sleeve I got a ticket for the train And I'm ready to leave I got a rockin' pneumonia and the boogie woogie flu I got the palpations All because of you I got a bee in my bonnet Got a chip on my shoulder I'm burning, with love I got my fish on the line I got my hand in the water I know right from wrong So I do what I oughta I laugh in the day I cry in the night Woo hoo baby Gonna be alright I got a bee in my bonnet Got a chip on my shoulder I got a bee in my bonnet Got a chip on my shoulder |
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"I'm a clockwork creep
And I can't get to sleep They wind me up and let me go And I can't unwind Going out of my mind My time is coming soon you know" Tick a tick a time bomb Tick a tick a time bomb Tick a tick a time bomb "I'm a jumbo jet With a brand new set Of passengers and bags and crew I'll spread my wings - Do a thousand things To prove how good I am to you" Tick a tick a time bomb Tick a tick a time bomb Tick a tick a time bomb Tick a tick a time bomb Tick a tick a time bomb Tick a tick a time bomb Meanwhile in the cargo of escargot The temperature is rising Advertising that our time is running Down, down, down, down, down Oh with just one minute to live Oh, no you'll never get me up in one of these again 'Cos what goes up (what goes up) must come Down, down, down, down, down Down, down, down, down, down Oh, the gravity of the situation It's only my willpower That keeps this thing in operation But we're gonna crash that's for certain The pilot is too busy flirtin' And he ain't aware That there's a bomb down there And if he don't do something it's curtains "Now just hold on" Said the little bomb, "If you were just to hold my hands Then time would stop The plot would flop And jumbo would be safe to land" Tick a tick a time bomb Tick a tick a time bomb Tick a tick a time bomb My landings are the envy Of Sabena and Pan Am From Chattanooga to Japan I taxi through the airways - What a safe little plane What a fine little plane What a great little plane I am "Hang on one sec I'm a clockwork wreck And though my fuse is burning slow Must keep my date to detonate Goodbye, ta ta, and cheerio Tick a tick a time bomb Tick a tick a time bomb Tick a tick a time bomb Tick a tick a time bomb Tick a tick a time bomb Tick a tick a time bomb Tick a tick a time bomb Tick a tick a time bomb Tick a tick a time bomb Tick a........." |
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