Cab Calloway

Folks here's a story 'bout Minnie the Moocher; she was a red hot hoochie
coocher.
She was the roughest toughest frail; but Minnie had a heart as big as a whale.
Hi de hi de hi de hi
Ho de ho de ho de ho
Hee de hee de hee de hee
Ho oo waooo waoooo
She messed around with a bloke named Smokey; She loved him though he was kokey.
He took her down to Chinatown and showed her how to kick the gong around.
Hi-de-hi-de-hi-de-hi
Ho-whooooaaaa-ahhhh-ohh
He-de-he-de-hee-de-he
Ho-oh-ho-oh
She had a dream about the king of Sweden; he gave her things, that she was
needin'.
He gave her a home built of gold and steel, a diamond car, with the puh-latinum
wheels.
Hi-de-hi-de-hi-de-hi-de-hi-de-hi-de-hi
Ho-de-ho-de-ho-de-ho-de-ho-de-oh
Skeedle-a-booka-diki biki skeedly beeka gookity woop!
A-booriki-booriki-booriki Hoy!
He gave her his town house and his racing horses; each meal she ate was a dozen
courses.
She had a million dollars in nickels and dimes; she sat around and counted it
all, a million times.
Hi-de-hi-de-hi-de-hi
Ho-oh-whoaa-oh-oh-whoa
He-de-he-de-hee-de-hee
Poor Min! Poor Min! Poo-oor Min

(Greer-Robinson)
Transcribed from Cab Calloway and His Orchestra, recorded October 21, 1931.
From Cab Calloway and His Orchestra 1931-1932; The Chronogical Classics 526

Poor me, I ain't got a gal in this town,
All of them turned me down,
'Cause I ain't got a gal in this town.

Eee-eee-eee...
All yellows and browns,
All of them turned me down,
'Cause I ain't got a gal in this town.

Boo-hoo, you hear my mournful wail,
I even looked in jail,
For a familiar frail.

Oooh-doo, you, you, you got me down,
Stop your dragging me 'round,
'Cause I ain't got a gal in this town.

I've got a million gals in Memphis,
I've got a gal way out in Saint Paul,
I took my hat and left them flat
'Cause they couldn't kick the gong.

[Repeats first four verses]

Aw, you dog, you dirty dog,
You better stop your sniffing around like that;
I know just what you're driving at!

Aw, you dog, you dirty, dirty, dirty, dirty, dirty dog,
You sniffing, snapping, yipping, yapping,
Aw, you dog!

Say, they got the news all over town,
You and my wife been running 'round,
Stop it 'fore I mow you down,
Aw, you dog!

Deacon Green's been talking, too,
He said that he saw you
Kiss my wife in the pew,
Aw, you dog!

Aw, you dog, you dirty, dirty, dirty, dirty dog,
You better stop your sniffing around like that;
I know just what you're driving at!

Aw, you dog, you dirty, dirty, dirty, dirty dog,
You sniffing, snapping, yipping, yapping,
Aw, you dog!

Aw, you dog, you dog, you dirty, dirty, dirty, dirty dog,
You sniffing, snapping, yipping, yapping,
Aw, you dog!

Down in Louisiana
There's a grand piano-playing man;
He knows that they can't kid him
'Cause he's got hot rhythm in his hand.
The blues that he'll compose will thrill you
From your head to your toes.
He called his song "Black Rhythm,"
'Cause his black hands did it 'neath the moon,
The keys he plays on sweetly,
And you're left completely in a swoon.
The melancholy strum
Mixed with the rum-tum of melodious blues.

When he plays the blue note,
And adds a new note,
You'll think that he wrote a symphony.
But he's just improvising
On a southern mammy melody.
You'll quit your pouting,
And start a'shouting,
No need in doubting he knows the keys.
He can lay on the white ones,
Can play on the black ones with ease.
The way he plays Black Rhythm
Makes the gang stick with him all night long,
Forget the hour is late,
They hear him syncopate his mournful song.
A'humming like the breeze,
A' strumming lightly on those ivories.

What can I do
Now that you say we're through?
I'm left with the blues in my heart.

How can I smile
When love don't seem worthwhile?
I'm left with the blues in my heart.

How can I live?
What is there life can give
As long as we're apart?

How can I go on
Knowing that you are gone?
I'm left with the blues in my heart.

You're bound to fall for the bugle call;
You're gonna brag 'bout the Bugle Call Rag.
Thin or fat, young or old;
Shake their shoulders bold.
You're bound to fall for the bugle call;
You're gonna brag 'bout the Bugle Call Rag.
Hold me baby; Let's syncopate to that blue melody;
Just hesitate while a break they take Shh!
While we're dancing please hold me tight; step lively don't lag.

This is what I have from the life record recorded during Jazz Jamboree in Warsaw (Poland) in 1974

"Corinne, Corinna why (where) you've been so long
Tell me Corinna why (where) you've been so long
I haven't had no lovin' since you've been gone

I love Corinna, I tell you where I do
Well, I love Corinna, I tell you where I do
Well, I hope some day ....... (?) Canda love me too

Corinne, Corinna where you'd stay late night
Tell me Corenna where you'd stay last night
You came home this morning the suny shinin' rise (?)

I met Corinna way across the sea
Yes I met Corinna way across the sea
She didn't write me no letter, she didn't care for me

Bye, bye Corinna I got to leave you now
Bye, bye Corinna I got to leave you now
Well I know you didn't mean it, no good, no harm"

When the days are sad and long,
I just keep wandering on,
To the place I hear a call,
Because the one I love is there;
Back to the fields of cotton
To hear a Creole love song.

Dinah, is there anyone finer
In the state of Carolina?
If there is and you know her
Show her to me

Dinah, with her Dixie eyes blazing
How I'd like to sit and gaze in
To the eyes of Dinah Lee

Every night why do I shake with fright?
Because my Dinah might change her mind about me

Got to tell you about Dinah
If she went to China
I'd would hop an ocean liner
Just to be with Dinah Lee

Dinah, is there anyone finer
In the state of Carolina?
If there is and you know her
Show her to me

Dinah, with her Dixie eyes blazing
How I'd like to sit and gaze in
To the eyes of Dinah Lee

Every night why do I shake with fright?
Because my Dinah might change her mind about me

Here's the story about Dinah
If she went to China
I'd would hop an ocean liner
Just to be with Dinah Lee
Pretty Dinah Lee

Gather round,
You get a thrill in your feet
That'll never be beat
When you're doin' the rhumba!

Hit the ground!
You'll find that everything shakes,
What a difference it makes
When you're doin' the rhumba!

Don't you stop,
Spin around again like a top!

What a dance,
Begin learning it now,
You'll be happy somehow,
When you're doin' the rhumba!

Take a chance,
Down in the valley they say,
Darkies wiggle and sway,
When you're doin' the rhumba!

You just
Wanna click those castanets!

What a dance,
Gets you right on the spot,
Swing out and get hot
When you're doing the rhumba!

Gee, but it's hard to love someone when that someone don't love you!
I'm so disgusted, heart-broken, too; I've got those down-hearted blues;
Once I was crazy 'bout a man; he mistreated me all the time,
The next man I get has got to promise me to be mine, all mine!

Trouble, trouble, I've had it all my days,
Trouble, trouble, I've had it all my days;
It seems like trouble going to follow me to my grave.

I ain't never loved but three mens in my life;
I ain't never loved but three men in my life:
My father, my brother, the man that wrecked my life.

It may be a week, it may be a month or two,
It may be a week, it may be a month or two,
But the day you quit me, honey, it's comin' home to you.

I got the world in a jug, the stopper's in my hand,
I got the world in a jug, the stopper's in my hand,
I'm gonna hold it until you meet some of my demands.

Another version
-------------------
Gee, but it's hard to love someone
When that someone don't love you;
I'm so disgusted, heart-broken, too
I've got those down-hearted blues.

I was crazy 'bout a gal,
She mistreated me all the time,
Next gal I get, she's got to promise to
Be mine, all mine.

'Cause she mistreated me,
And she drove me from her door;
Yes, she mistreated me,
She drove me from her door,
But the Good Book says,
She'll reap just what she'll sow.

I ain't never loved but three women in all my life,
I never loved but three women in all my life,
That was my mother, my sister, and the gal that wrecked my life.

[Heavily scatted]
All the dirt you done to me
Is bound to come back to you.

Sadness just makes me sigh,
I've come to say goodbye,
Altho' I go, I've got those farewell blues.
Those farewell blues make me yearn,
That parting kiss seems to burn.
Farewell, dearie, Someday I will return.
Dreaming of you is sweet,
Someday again we'll meet.

A
Oh, she's pretty and witty, soft-natured and sweet
Attractive and active, boy, clever and neat;
I've got a darn good reason now for being good.

A
I'm hazy and I'm crazy; I'm crazy for love,
She's willing for billing and she coos like a dove;
I've got a darn good reason now for being good.

B
I was just a rounder turning nighttime into day,
But now it's different; since this loving made me change my way;

A
Oh she kills me and she thrills me; she has big satin bows;
She knows it and she shows it wherever she goes.
I've got a darn good reason now for being good.

I'm the world's most happy creature,
Tell me, what can worry me?
I'm crazy 'bout my baby,
And my baby's crazy 'bout me!

Mr. Cupid was our teacher,
That's the reason we agree,
I'm crazy 'bout my baby,
And my baby's crazy 'bout me!

Parson, get your book out,
Get it ready in your hand,
Keep a steady look-out;
'Cause I know you understand.

We're an A-one combination,
The perfect he and she,
I'm crazy 'bout my baby,
And my baby's crazy 'bout me!

It looks like Susie,
It must be Susie,
I'm sure it's Susie,
But I don't know;
Could be Virginia
With her eyes of blue,
Could be Mary,
Sweet Mary Lou,
But it looks like Susie,
She talks like Susie,
She walks like Susie,
Oh, gosh, oh, gee!
Just ask her if she knows Lou
From Boston, Massachu,
If she does,
Why, then it's Susie Lee!

It looks like Susie,
Must be Susie,
I'm sure it's Susie,
Aw, but I don't know, let me see;
Could be Virginia
No, she's got eyes of blue,
Then again, it could be Mary,
Sweet Mary Lou,
Ah, but it looks like Susie,
She talks like Susie,
Ah, she walks like Susie,
And if it ain't Susie, glory!
Now, get all the friends you've known
And give a swell party at your home,
And if she breaks it up,
Whoopie! It's Susie Lee!

It was down in Chinatown,
All the cokies laid around,
Some were high and some were mighty low;
There were millions on the floor
When a knock came on the door,
And there stood old Smoky Joe.

He was sweatin', cold and pale,
He was lookin' for his frail,
He was broke and all his junk ran out;
Nobody made a sound,
As he stood and looked around,
And then you hear old Smoky shout:

Saying, "Tell me where is Minnie?
My poor Minnie!
Has she been here,
Kicking the gong around?"

"If you don't know Minnie,
She's tall and skinny,
She gets her pleasure
Kicking the gong around!"

[Scat chorus]

"Just tell her Smoky Joe
Was here and had to go."
And as he departed,
The curtains parted,
And there stood Minnie
Kicking the gong around!


Another version
----------------------
It was down in Chinatown,
All the cokies laid around,
Some were high and some were mighty low;
Count millions on the floor
When a knock came on the door,
And there stood old Smoky Joe.

He was sweatin', cold and pale,
He was lookin' for his frail,
He was broke and all his junk ran out;
As he stood and looked around,
Nobody made a sound,
And then you hear old Smoky shout:

"Tell me where is Minnie?
Oh, I want my little Minnie!
Has she been here,
Kicking the gong around?"

"If you don't know Minnie,
Oh, she's tall and skinny,
She gets her pleasure
Kicking the gong around!"

[Scat chorus]

"You just tell her Smoky Joe
Was here and had to go."
And as he departed,
The curtains parted,
And there was Minnie
Kickin' the gong around!

Folks here's a story 'bout Minnie the Moocher; she was a red hot hoochie
coocher.
She was the roughest toughest frail; but Minnie had a heart as big as a whale.
Hi de hi de hi de hi
Ho de ho de ho de ho
Hee de hee de hee de hee
Ho oo waooo waoooo
She messed around with a bloke named Smokey; She loved him though he was kokey.
He took her down to Chinatown and showed her how to kick the gong around.
Hi-de-hi-de-hi-de-hi
Ho-whooooaaaa-ahhhh-ohh
He-de-he-de-hee-de-he
Ho-oh-ho-oh
She had a dream about the king of Sweden; he gave her things, that she was
needin'.
He gave her a home built of gold and steel, a diamond car, with the puh-latinum
wheels.
Hi-de-hi-de-hi-de-hi-de-hi-de-hi-de-hi
Ho-de-ho-de-ho-de-ho-de-ho-de-oh
Skeedle-a-booka-diki biki skeedly beeka gookity woop!
A-booriki-booriki-booriki Hoy!
He gave her his town house and his racing horses; each meal she ate was a dozen
courses.
She had a million dollars in nickels and dimes; she sat around and counted it
all, a million times.
Hi-de-hi-de-hi-de-hi
Ho-oh-whoaa-oh-oh-whoa
He-de-he-de-hee-de-hee
Poor Min! Poor Min! Poo-oor Min

Here's some news that'll get you,
It's made to order for you.
I just bet it'll fit you,
Follow up these red hot blues.

Grab a taxi and go down,
Chinatown's on a spree;
Let me give you the lowdown,
This is really history.

Whenever folks in Chinatown start acting gay
There's something in the air that makes them feel that way.
Yeah, man, I heard somebody say
It's Minnie the Moocher's wedding day!

Old Smoky Joe's so happy he can hardly wait,
He's spent a million dollars for his wedding date,
Yeah, man, they're gonna celebrate,
It's Minnie the Moocher's wedding day.

You better come on down,
Way down in Chinatown,
Oh, let me take you down
To see them kick the gong around.

A million cokies shouting, "Hay-de-hay-de-hay!"
The king of Sweden's gonna give the bride away,
Yeah, man, I heard somebody say,
It's Minnie the Moocher's wedding day!

The king and queen of every nation
Were glad to get an invitation;
The prince of Wales said he would get away
For Minnie the Moocher's wedding day!

They said a hundred thousand hoppies
Went over to China picking poppies,
They're gonna put them all in one bouquet
For Minnie the Moocher's wedding day!

Hi-de-hi-de-hi,
Ho-de-ho-de-ho-de-ho!
Hay-de-hay-de-hay,
It's Minnie the Moocher's wedding day!

Yeah, man! Why, what's that them boys say?
It's Minnie the Moocher's wedding day!

My honey's lovin' arms,
They hold a world of charms,
Little place to nestle when I'm so lonely,
I'm comin', little morris chair,
Oh, what a happy little pair!
Loveliness and happiness
Seem to bless
My loving little honey
I love her more each day,
When years have passed away,
You'll find the love belongs to you only,
'Cause when the world seems wrong,
I know that I belong,
Right in my honey's lovin' arms.

You're nobody, nobody's sweetheart now,
There's no place for you somehow,
With all of your fancy clothes, silken gowns,
You'll be out of place in the middle of your own hometown,
When you walk down the avenue,
All the folks just can't believe that it's you.
With all those painted lips and painted eyes,
Wearing a bird of paradise,
It all seems wrong somehow,
It seems so funny,
You're nobody's sweetheart now!

St. Louis woman, she's never pleased,
She says there's one good man who'll soon be deceived,
If she can't hear from him each night at least
Six or seven times.

She says the other songs don't mean a thing,
There's only one that makes her heart go bing,
That's why she craves that little tune I sing
Six or seven times.

You're so sweet, how could anyone be so sweet?
Tell me, little one,
Believe me, you're a lucky find,
Peaches, cream and honey, all of them combined.

You're so sweet, like a little flower,
Grow sweet, every little hour,
You know, sweet, you'll always be
So sweet to me!

Some of these days you're gonna be so lonely,
Some of these days you're gonna want me only,
You'll miss my love and miss my kiss,
You're gonna miss your little daddy when he goes away!

You'll be so lonely alone without me,
You know, baby, why I went away;
Oh, when I'm leaving, there's no doubt your heart'll be grieving;
You're gonna miss your daddy, mama, some of these days.

Somebody stole my gal,
Somebody stole my pal,
Somebody came and took her away,
She didn't even say she was leavin',
Her kisses I love so,
He's gettin' now I know...
And gee, I know that she,
Would come to me
If she could see,
Her broken hearted lonesome pal,
Somebody stole my gal!

Folks, I'm goin' down to St. James Infirmary,
See my baby there;
She's stretched out on a long, white table,
She's so sweet, so cold, so fair.

Let her go, let her go, God bless her,
Wherever she may be,
She will search this wide world over,
But she'll never find another sweet man like me.

Now, when I die, bury me in my straight-leg britches,
Put on a box-back coat and a stetson hat,
Put a twenty-dollar gold piece on my watch chain,
So you can let all the boys know I died standing pat.

An' give me six crap shooting pall bearers,
Let a chorus girl sing me a song.
Put a red hot jazz band at the top of my head
So we can raise Hallelujah as we go along.

Folks, now that you have heard my story,
Say, boy, hand me another shot of that booze;
If anyone should ask you,
Tell 'em I've got those St. James Infirmary blues.

I hate to see that evening sun go down,
I hate to see that evening sun go down,
'Cause my lovin' baby done left this town.

If I feel tomorrow, like I feel today,
If I feel tomorrow, like I feel today,
I'm gonna pack my trunk and make my getaway.

Oh, that St. Louis woman, with her diamond rings,
She pulls my man around by her apron strings.
And if it wasn't for powder and her store-bought hair,
Oh, that man of mine wouldn't go nowhere.

I got those St. Louis blues, just as blue as I can be,
Oh, my man's got a heart like a rock cast in the sea,
Or else he wouldn't have gone so far from me.

I love my man like a schoolboy loves his pie,
Like a Kentucky colonel loves his rocker and rye
I'll love my man until the day I die, Lord, Lord.

I got the St. Louis blues, just as blue as I can be, Lord, Lord!
That man's got a heart like a rock cast in the sea,
Or else he wouldn't have gone so far from me.

I got those St. Louis blues, I got the blues, I got the blues, I got the blues,
My man's got a heart like a rock cast in the sea,
Or else he wouldn't have gone so far from me, Lord, Lord!

Another version
-----------------------
A
Got St. Louis blues.....blue as I can be;

B
There's two people in this world I just can't stand;
There's two people in this world I just can't stand;
That's a two-faced woman and a lyin' man;

B
I'm gonna leave this town walkin', talkin' to myself;
I'm gonna leave this town walkin', talkin' to myself;
Because the sweet woman I love, she belongs to somebody else.

C (The following verse is so heavily scatted that it is virtually incomprehensible.)
(Oh, I say, look here, sweet mama, someday your papa's...
When that big old hound comes around...
And when that big old piece of hound comes..
He's sure gonna leave this town.)

B
I'm goin' back to Chicago to have my hambone boiled;
I'm goin' way back to Chicago to have my hambone boiled;
Because these women in New York City let my good hambone spoil.

D
I got the St.Louis blues, sweet mama, got St. Louis blues, just blue,
Blue as I can be, St. Louis blues; baby,
Aw, your daddy got St. Louis blues, sweet mama,
All those blues, I'm blue as I can be.


Version 3
------------------
I hate to see that evenin' sun go down,
I hate to see that evenin' sun go down,
'Cause my baby has left this town.

If I'm feelin' tomorrow, just like I feel today,
If I'm feelin' tomorrow, like I feel today,
I'll pack my trunk and make my get-away.

St. Louis woman, with all her diamond rings,
Stole that man of mine, by her apron strings;
If it wasn't for powder, and her store-bought hair,
That man I love wouldn't've gone nowhere!
Nowhere!

I've got the St. Louis blues, just as blue as I can be;
Lord, that man's got a heart like a rock cast in the sea,
Or else he wouldn't have gone so far from me!

Gee, I love that man like a school boy loves his pie,
Just like an old Kentucky colonel loves his rock and rye,
I guess I'll love that man until the day I die.

Sometimes I wonder why I spend
The lonely night dreaming of a song;
The melody haunts my reverie
And I am once again with you.
That was long ago,
When each kiss was an inspiration;
Now you were in my arms,
And my consolation
Is in the stardust of a song,
Beside a garden wall,
When the stars are bright
You are in my arms;
The little nightengale sings his fairytale
Of paradise where roses grew,
Though I dream in vain
In my heart it will remain
My stardust melody,
The memory of love's refrain.
When I'm all alone
And thought I was with you,
I get so lonesome, honey, just for you,
I love to hear you sing that song.

When your spirits are low,
There's a place you can go.
You'll never see white folks
At a strictly cullud affair.

See 'em laying 'em down,
Boys, they goin' to town,
You may see a few light folks
But they all got cullud folks' hair.

It's given by the colored ladies' auxiliary,
Come on, brothers, check in all your artillery.

Spend your nickels and dimes,
Have some marv-yu-lous times;
I mean it's too tight, folks,
At a strictly cullud affair.

(Louis Armstrong)

No gal made has got a shade
On sweet georgia brown,
Two left feet, oh, so neat,
Has sweet georgia brown!
They all sigh, and want to die,
For sweet georgia brown!
I'll tell you just why,
You know i don't lie, not much:
It's been said she knocks 'em dead,
When she lands in town!
Since she came, why it's a shame,
How she cools them down!
Fellas she can't get
Must be fellas she ain't met!
Georgia claimed her, georgia named her,
Sweet georgia brown!
No gal made has got a shade
On sweet georgia brown,
Two left feet, oh, so neat,
Has sweet georgia brown!
They all sigh, and want to die,
For sweet georgia brown!
I'll tell you just why,
You know i don't lie; not much:
All those gifts those courters give,
To sweet georgia brown,
They buy clothes at fashion shows,
With one dollar down,
Oh, boy! tip your hat!
Oh, joy! she's the cat!
Who's that, mister? 'tain't a sister!
Sweet georgia brown!

A
Sweet Jenny Lee from sunny Tennessee,
You'll love her when you see
Sweet Jenny Lee!

A
Each little bird is singing merrily
Just getting set to see
Sweet Jenny Lee!

B
She's got that certain little something in her style,
She's got a great big bit of heaven right in her smile.

A
She promised me that she'd say yessiree,
That's good enough for me,
Sweet Jenny Lee.

Slumber, never comes around 'til dawn,
My head starts reeling,
I dream that I'm kneeling,
It seems that I'm kneeling on the ceiling of my room!

Nightmare, sure has got me in the air,
It's no use denying,
And there's no denying,
I dream that I'm dying and going in my tomb.

When your sweetie tells you, everything'll be okay,
Just skeep-beep de bop-bop beep bop bo-dope skeetle-at-de-op-de-day!

If you feel like shoutin', advertise it just this way:
And skeep-beep de bop-bop beep bop bo-dope skeetle-at-de-op-de-day!

Don't give a hang what words you use at any time,
Sing this silly language, without any reason or rhyme.

When you face the preacher, there's only one thing to say:
Just skeep-beep de bop-bop beep bop bo-dope skeetle-at-de-op-day!

[Scat chorus]


Another version
----------------------
[Starts with impressive scatting, then:]

Spoken: [Bennie Payne?] Say, what you doin', boy? [Cab] Oh, man, I'm just scatting and going right on to town, Satchmo!

When your sweetie tells you, everything'll be okay,
Just:


If you feel like shoutin', advertise it just this way:
And

Don't give a hang what words you use at any time,
Sing this silly language, without any reason or rhyme.

When you face the preacher, there's only one thing to say:
Just

[Followed by incredible scat-singing!]

Just follow me,
And you will see,
What folks in Harlem
Call Trickeration.

Don't mean a thing,
This crazy swing,
Latest thing in Harlem,
Trickeration!

Rhythm, look what you went and done,
Rhythm, you are the guilty one.

Another phrase,
Just another craze,
Everyone in Harlem
Does Trickeration.

You sure is a rascal!

I'll be glad when you dead, you rascal, you!
I'll be glad when you dead, you rascal, you!
When you dead in your grave,
No more women will you crave.
I'll be glad when you dead, you rascal, you!

I trust you in my home, you rascal, you.
I trust you in my home, you rascal, you.
I trust you in my home,
You wouldn't leave my wife alone.
I'll be glad when you dead, you rascal, you!

I fed you since last fall, you rascal, you.
I fed you since last fall, you rascal, you.
I fed you since last fall,
Then you got your ashes hauled.
I'll be glad when you dead, you rascal, you!

You asked my wife to wash your clothes, you rascal, you.
You asked my wife to wash your clothes, you rascal, you.
You asked my wife to wash your clothes
And something else I suppose.
I'll be glad when you dead, you rascal, you!

You know you done me wrong, you rascal, you.
You know you done me wrong, you rascal, you.
You know you done me wrong,
You done stole my wife and gone.
I'll be glad when you dead, you rascal, you!

You asked my wife for a meal, you rascal, you!
You asked my wife for a meal, you rascal, you!
You asked my wife for a meal,
And something else you tried to steal.
I'll be glad when you dead, you rascal, you!

Please don't me find you, rascal, you.
Please don't let me find you, rascal, you!
Please don't let me find you
'Cause you'll leave this world behind you.
I'll be glad when you dead, you rascal, you!

Ain't no use to run, you rascal, you.
Ain't no use to run, you rascal, you.
Ain't no use to run,
I done bought a Gatling gun,
And you still having your fun, you rascal, you!

I'm gonna kill you just for fun, you rascal, you!
I'm gonna kill you just for fun, you rascal, you!
I'm gonna kill you just for fun;
The buzzards gonna have you when I'm done.
I'll be glad when you dead, you rascal, you!

You done messed with my wife, you rascal, you!
You done messed with my wife, you rascal, you!
You done messed with my wife,
And I'm gonna take your life.
I'll be glad when you dead, you rascal, you!

Another version
---------------------
I'll be glad when you're dead, you rascal, you!
I'll be glad when you're dead, you rascal, you!
When you're dead and in your grave,
No more women will you crave,
I'll be glad when you're dead, you rascal, you!

You messed with my wife, you rascal, you!
You messed with my wife, you rascal, you!
You messed with my wife,
Now I'm going to take your life,
I'll be glad when you're dead, you rascal, you!

You asked my wife for a meal, you rascal, you!
You asked my wife for a meal, you rascal, you!
You asked my wife for a meal
And something else you tried to steal,
I'll be glad when you're dead, you rascal, you!

You asked my wife to wash your clothes, you rascal, you!
You asked my wife to wash your clothes, you rascal, you!
You asked my wife to wash your clothes
And something else, I suppose,
I'll be glad when you're dead, you rascal, you!

Version 3
--------------------
I'll be glad when you dead, you rascal, you.
I'll be glad when you dead, you rascal, you.
When they bury you six feet deep
No more fried chicken can you eat,
I'll be glad when you dead, you rascal, you.

I'll be oh, so glad when you dead, you rascal, you.
I'll be glad when you dead, you rascal, you.
I'll be standing on a corner full of gin
When they bring your dead body in,
I'll be glad when you dead, you rascal, you.

I'll be oh, so glad when you dead, you rascal, you.
I'll be oh, so glad when you dead, you rascal, you.
I took you to my home,
You wouldn't leave my wife alone.
I'll be glad when you dead, you rascal, oh, you hound!

I'll be oh, so glad when you dead, you rascal, you.
I'll be oh, so glad when you dead, you rascal, you.
What's this thing you got
Makes my wife think you're so hot? You dirty dog!
I'll be glad when you dead, you rascal, oh, you hound!

It was down in Chinatown,
All the cokies laid around,
Some were high and some were mighty low;
There were millions on the floor
When a knock came on the door,
And there stood old Smoky Joe.

He was sweatin', cold and pale,
He was lookin' for his frail,
He was broke and all his junk ran out;
Nobody made a sound,
As he stood and looked around,
And then you hear old Smoky shout:

Saying, "Tell me where is Minnie?
My poor Minnie!
Has she been here,
Kicking the gong around?"

"If you don't know Minnie,
She's tall and skinny,
She gets her pleasure
Kicking the gong around!"

[Scat chorus]

"Just tell her Smoky Joe
Was here and had to go."
And as he departed,
The curtains parted,
And there stood Minnie
Kicking the gong around!


Another version
----------------------
It was down in Chinatown,
All the cokies laid around,
Some were high and some were mighty low;
Count millions on the floor
When a knock came on the door,
And there stood old Smoky Joe.

He was sweatin', cold and pale,
He was lookin' for his frail,
He was broke and all his junk ran out;
As he stood and looked around,
Nobody made a sound,
And then you hear old Smoky shout:

"Tell me where is Minnie?
Oh, I want my little Minnie!
Has she been here,
Kicking the gong around?"

"If you don't know Minnie,
Oh, she's tall and skinny,
She gets her pleasure
Kicking the gong around!"

[Scat chorus]

"You just tell her Smoky Joe
Was here and had to go."
And as he departed,
The curtains parted,
And there was Minnie
Kickin' the gong around!

Fellows, if you're arn
I will spin a yarn
That was told to me by Able Seaman Jones.
Once he had the blues
So he took a cruise
Far away from night-clubs and from saxophones.
He said, "Yo Ho, I've made a certain port
And when you talk about real he-man sport":

Hot ginger and dynamite
There's nothing but that at night
Back in Nagasaki
Where the fellers chew tobaccy
And the women wicky-wacky
Woo.
The way they can entertain
Would hurry a hurricane
Back in Nagasaki
Where the fellers chew tobaccy
And the women wicky wacky
Woo.

In Fujiama
You get a mama
Then your troubles increase.
In some pagoda
She orders soda
Earth-shake milk-shakes, ten cents a piece.
They kissy and huggy nice
Oh, By Jingo! I'ts worth the price.
Back in Nagasaki
Where the fellers chew tobaccy
And the women wicky-wacky
Woo.

Now when the day is warm
You can keep in form
With a bowl of rice beneath a parasol.
Every gentle man
Has to use a fan
And they only use suspenders in the fall.
That's where the girls don't think of rings and furs.
Gosh, it's the nicest place that ever weres.

They give you a carriage free
The horse is a Japanee
Back in Nagasaki
Where the fellers chew tobaccy
And the women wicky-wacky
Woo.
They sit you upon the floor
No wonder your pants get sore
Back in Nagasaki
Where the fellers chew tobaccy
And the women wicky-wacky
Woo.

With Sweet Kimoner
I pulled a boner
I kept it up at high speed.
I got rhumatics
And then psyatics
Halatosisis, that's guarenteed.
You just have to act your age
Or wind up inside a cage
Back in Nagasaki
Where the fellers chew tobaccy
And the women wicky-wacky
Woo.

With an ice-cream cone and a bottle of tea
You can rest all day by the hickory tree
But when night comes round, oh gosh oh gee,
Mother, mother, mother, pin a rose on me.

Those pretty mamas
In pink pyjamas
They try to give you a kiss
Those torid teases
In B.V.D.ses
Heaven help a sailor on a night like this!
Not too gentle and not too rough
But you've got to tell them when you've had enough
Back in Nagasaki
Where the fellers chew tobaccy
And the women wicky-wacky
Woo.

You're nobody, nobody's sweetheart now,
There's no place for you somehow,
With all of your fancy clothes, silken gowns,
You'll be out of place in the middle of your own hometown,
When you walk down the avenue,
All the folks just can't believe that it's you.
With all those painted lips and painted eyes,
Wearing a bird of paradise,
It all seems wrong somehow,
It seems so funny,
You're nobody's sweetheart now!

Some of these days you're gonna be so lonely,
Some of these days you're gonna want me only,
You'll miss my love and miss my kiss,
You're gonna miss your little daddy when he goes away!

You'll be so lonely alone without me,
You know, baby, why I went away;
Oh, when I'm leaving, there's no doubt your heart'll be grieving;
You're gonna miss your daddy, mama, some of these days.