Viktor Vaughn [랩]

Beef rap could lead to gettin' teeth capped
Or even a wreath for mom dukes on some grief crap
I suggest you change your diet
It can lead to high blood pressure if you fry it

Or even a stroke, heart attack, heart disease
It ain't no startin' back once arteries start to squeeze
Take the easy way out, phony, until then they know
They wouldn't be talkin' that bologna in the bullpen

So disgustin, pardon self as I discuss this
They talk a wealth of shit and they ain't never seen the justice
Bust this like a cold milk from out the toilet
Two batteries some Brillo and some foil, he'll boil it

He be better off on PC glued
And it's a feud so don't be in no TV mood
Every week it's mystery meat, seaweed stewed

He wears a mask just to cover the raw flesh
A rather ugly brother with flows that's gorgeous
Drop dead joints hit the whips like bird shit
They need it like a hole in they head or a third tit

Her bra smell, his card say, aw, hell
Barred from all bars and kicked out the Carvel
Keep a cooker where the jar fell
And keep a cheap hooker that's off the hook like Ma Bell

Top bleeding, maybe fellow took the loaded rod gears
Stop feeding babies colored, sugar coated lard squares
The odd pairs swears and God fears
Even when it's rotten, we've gotten through the hard years

I wrote this note around New Year's
Off a couple a shots and a few beers, but who cares
Enough about me, it's about the beats
Not about the streets and who food he about to eat

A rhymin' cannibal who's dressed to kill, it's cynical
Whether is it animal, vegetable or mineral
It's a miracle how he get so lyrical
And proceed to move the crowd like a old negro spiritual

For a mil' do a commercial for Mello Yello
Tell 'em devil's hell, no, sell y'all own Jello
We hollow krills, she swallow pills
He follow flea collar, three dollar bills

And squeal for halal veal, in y'all appeal
Dig the real, it's how the big ballers deal
Twirl a L after every meal

Word up to all rappers, shut up with ya shuttin' up
And keep your shirt on, at least a button up
Yuck, is they rhymers or strippin' males?
Outta work jerks since they shut down Chippendales

They chippin' nails, doom, chippin' scales
Let alone the pre-orders that's counted off shippin' sales
This one goes out to all my peoples skippin' bail
Dippin' jail, whippin' tail and sippin' ale

Light the doobie 'til it glow like a ruby
After which they couldn't find the villain like Scooby
He's in the lab on some old Buddha Monk shit
Overproof drunk shit and who'da thunk it

Punk, try and ask why ours be better
It could be the iron mask or the Cosby sweater
Yes, you, who's screwed by the dude on the CD nude

Before we go any further, friends

As you call 'em they call you when they need somethin'
Trees for the blunt, two G's for the front
I found a way to get peace of mind for years and left the hell alone
Turn a deaf ear to the cellular phone

Send me a letter or better, we could see each other in real life
Just so you could feel me like a steel knife
At least so you could see the white of their eyes
Bright with surprise once they finish spittin' lies

Associates, is your boys, your girls, bitches, niggaz, homies?
Close, but really don't know me
Mom, dad, comrade, peeps, brothers, sisters, duns, dunnies
Some come around when they need some money

Others make us laugh like the Sunday funnies
Fam be around whether you paid or bummy
You could either ignore this advice or take it from me
Be too nice and people take you for a dummy

So nowadays he ain't so friendly
Actually they wouldn't even made a worthy enemy
Read the signs, no feeding the baboon
Seein' as how they got your back bleeding from the stab wounds

Y'all know the dance, they smile in your face, y'all know the glance
Try ta put 'em on, they blow the chance
Never let your so-called mans know your plans
How many of us have them? A show of hands

Friends is a term some people use loosely
I'm real choosy on what I choose to let crews see
You telling me, I try to act broke
Jealousy, the number one killer among black folk

Fellas be under some type of spell like crack smoke
Ghetto Cinderellas, lead 'em right to your stack, loc
Just another way a chick'll lead to your end
I check the dictionary for the meanin' of 'Friends'

It said, person, one who likes to socialize with
Sympathize and help her and that's about the size of it
Most of the time these attributes is one-sided
To bolster the crime they opt to shoot you through your eyelid

And they can't hide it goin' wild like a white bitch
Sometimes you need to cut niggaz off like a light switch
Click, and when things get quiet
Catch 'em like a thief in the night, bow, what a riot

I first met Mister Fantastik at a arms deal
Don't let it get drastic, think of how your moms will feel
When it get for real the steel get to sparkin'
Everything darken and ain't no talkin'

For somethin' so cheap it sure buys a lot of trouble
You better off focusing than tryin' to plot the bubble
Or else it'd be a sad note to end on, the guns we got
One's we can depend on, friends

Some come in the form of co-dependence
A lotta times only end up bein' co-defendants
Ten bucks say they'll tell for a lower sentence
And leave you up under the jail beggin' for a penance

It don't make no sense, what happened to the loyalty?
Honor amongst crooks, trust amongst royalty
I'd rather go out in a blaze, than give 'em the glory
How many of us have a similar story, friends?

Before lovers we used to have some type of over standing
Just so when I let her get the man-thing she know it's no strings
We could do the damn thing but, hoe, it's no rings
Just how the tramp swings, will she see 'em again?

That depends on how good was the skins
And could she memorize the lessons
It ain't no need to pretend
Even though she let 'em stab it, she know they just, friends

Friends, how many of us have them?
Friends, ones we can depend on?
Friends, how many of us have them?
Friends, before we go any further

KEEP YA HOES IN CHECK!(..Super!)
I got this girl and she wants me to duke Her
I told her I'd come scoop her around 8, she said "Super!"
that sounds great, shorty girl's a trooper
no matter what I need her to do, she be like "Super!"
own his own throne, the boss like King Koopa
on the microphone he flossed the ring "Super!
average emcees is like a TV blooper
MF DOOM...hes like D.B. Cooper
out wit the moolah, I let her get a outfit
jus to cool her off she said niggaz ain't about shit
I wonder if she meant it, I doubt it
the way it be in her mouth, she can't live witout it
and can't live with this, handle yo bidness
villain'll stay on a scandalous hoes shit list
one pack of cookies please Mr. Hooper
its fun smackin rookies, he is the "Super!"
look like a black wookie when he let his beard grow
weirdo, brown skin'ded always kept his hair low
rumor has it its a S-curl accident
DOOM was always known to keep the best girls backs bent
some say its the eyes, some say the accent
a lotta guys wonder where they stacks went
I call her thunder thighs, with the fatty swolla
only mess wit high rollas, do what daddy told her
no matter the city she with me to do the thang thang
work in the coochie, hooptie chitty chitty bang bang
same name on the titty as on the name ring
pretty like Baby D off "all in the same gang"
keep my eye on her really don't trust her
but I treat her like a daughter, taught her how to bust a nut
and the heat to turn beef to horsemeat chalupa
teach her how to hold it, of course he is the "Super!"
see most cats treat her like foofer
or beat her to a stupor, take it from the "Super!"
ya need to make her feel cuter
and lay down the G like Luther, everythin'll be "Super!"
do for her, keep her in a new fur
so she look sweet when she go to meet the "Super!"
got the buddha get the Grenadiers, twist it
put it in the air, come 'ere, kiss it
listen here scooter, let her try to bag you
when she's on the rag never let her fry the Ragu
which will have you under some type of spell crying "dag boo"
her name on ya back in her tattoo
whether a bourgie broad, nerd hoe, street chick
don't call her wifey if you met her at the freaknick
you don't want her don't waste her time, I'll dupe her
oh and be a father to ya child like the "Super!"
he keep his hoes in check
sends 'em out to get glows from off frozen necks
tell 'em take his clothes, leave him posin nekkid for real
better yet, get 'em for the check off the record deal
find out where he keep the tek an the blue steel
make sure for extra wreck let 'em know how you feel
and while he's runnin down to all star weekend to ball
I'm comin with the U-HAUL!(Super

Darker than the east river, larger than the Empire State
Where the beats to guard the barbed wire gate
Is on the job, not my fate, tired of the wait
To the villain bring deliverance from the Dire Straits

Fire at a higher rate, why'd they make the liars
Fliers scatter, buy a plate, isolate the wires
Try the straight pliers if not the vise grips
A real price saver way to acquire nice whips

What a steal for real on wheels of steel
Stunner a funner summer number one meal deal, bummer
A bizarre phenomenon is your armor on
Take your cash coma or break your fast, Ramadan

Trans action drama, aw, come on, Barney
Clack, clack, pardon me wack rap, Kon Karne
He came to feed the childrens like Sally Strothers
After that he's going back to Cali where's the love is

Wilder than the Nile, old power like the Great Pyramid of Giza
And stay leanin' like the tower of Pisa
Give him something he can feel that's off the squeeza
Raw with the pen and on the mic off the hezza

Get shot off that wide eye talk
If he had a pot he'd still piss on the sidewalk
Can't take the street out the street person
Looking for the perfect beat could worsen into heat bursting

They couldn't spot him on the spot date
Got the only tape that comes with a free hot plate
Whoever do get to see me sing
With the 3-D ring, sittin' stationary like B.B. King

Can see how it really sting, it ain't no front row
Standing room only at the motocross stunt show
The ruckus ain't up to snuffilufigus
Me and Sub is like the brown Smothers Brothers

My love is faster than the seven seas, bigger than mount Kilimanjaro
If they don't know fill them in tomorrow on the horror show
I'm into no return Bob's record
Swear to God before he gets a job he robs Hackard

Blessed with a hot flow, tested and got doe
Invested and stressed the best to finesse a opto
As I reminisce never forgot when I was very broke
Shot the Henny straight, couldn't afford to cop the cherry coke

Or should I say broke with wealth
To know enough to give them just rope to yoke they self
Playin' me before I take the ring and pawn it
The long arm of the law couldn't even put they fingers on it

Dog on it, do the statistics
How he bust lyrics was too futuristic for ballistics
And far too eccentric for forensics
I dedicate this mix to Subroc, the Hip Hop Hendrix

Give it a sec for the pain to start
This wreck right here, it ain't for the faint of heart
They thought they saw the worst verse
From the team of G men who seem like nerds at first

Once they get to know us people dig us
Leaders in the fight for equal rights for niggaz
Inventor of the more demented flow, nobody doubt it
Just go for it, if you bout it bout it or rowdy, rowdy

Whatever's clever, the master fold
Who every hooka heard of but now, ho, no
If we see tomorrow, the next day classes
The villain in the back with the x-ray glasses

Have no fear, the ninja here
Feel 'em like the tinge in your ear from drinkin' ginger beer
When it's on loco head gon' lay low
And heat it like beef patty, coco bread kon queso

If you say so lace the whole case load
They say he wear a metal mask in case his face show
He told 'em they flows is bitch talk and ayo's
His whole crew walk with pitchfork and halos

Say, ho, if you never worked a J-O
And keep more cash then a stash in a peso
Okay, yo, y'all know who to follow
Tie 'em up in the crib and leave the place hollow

Oh, shoot the goose, she's loose
So wild you couldn't chase it down with straight fruit juice
Frown like the first time you taste cous cous
Stash the deuce deuce, troops askin' truce, truce

Today on intense wreck week
We have the super villain in his own defense to speak
It's all part of my mental techniques
Available to freaks and pencil neck geeks

Train the same brain to a insane train of thought
On a campaign trail he came to gain your support
Charge cash for a autograph
Say some shit to make your daughter laugh then slaughter the ass

Seem 'em on the big screen like Steve McQueen
Do something and never be back once he leaves the scene
Keep more medicated pads than Stridex
For his own side wrecks with no known side effects

Before you press charges use your noodle
So what when he grab the mic he scratch your cute cuticles
Keep your mouth shut, everything will be beautiful
It would be often rude to you, now get back to your hooty hoo

Damn it, it ain't worth the drama, can it
From the calm bandit eat rhymers like pomegranate
Soon as he stepped in he lit the room
Boom, reschedule my noon with Britt Hume

Doom in love with Mary Jane, she's my main thing
Pulled her right from that web head, what a lame brain
Maintain and say it, don't spray it
You wanna see your girl again, you might as well pay it

If I had a dime for every rhymer that bust guns
I'll have a cool mil' for my sons in trust funds
When I was broker than a broke dick dog
I always kept a L to smoke in thick fog

When it rain it sure do thunderstorm
I got more rhymes in the summer than musty underarms
One, two, microphone checker
First learned to neck off a Home Ec homewrecker

This is back when he was like crib age
When he hit the stage it's like a gauge to the rib cage
Break the mic like a rock star, break a guitar
Jump off the stage like, yee haw

> [MF Doom]
One lonely evening alone home
End up with carpal tunnel syndrome
Here I am don't forget the heavy back aches
Grown and living off of little Debbie snack cakes
Supposed to be checking e-mails
All I got is messages from ass naked females
Kookies
I don't know no jenny she said its free and I wont owe her a penny
And that's the last time I saw her
But thousands of more horror and on-line Gomorra
And Sodom
They got 'em with they curls out
And they got a better sales pitch then the girl scouts
I wonder what I owe her
For a whole box of caramel coconut samoa
Nite nite
Ok honey sweet dreams now it gets very serious like peach creams
A metal hand filled squish it on the quilt
Misses wakes up and I'm killed over spilled milk
Locked in looking at your picture
Fully clothed winter and I right there wit cha
Thinking about the last time I split your wishbone
A man could only wish you could do the same till he get home
Fat chance
At least he got snacks
Better have the due till a brother get back
Till then smack when I jack
I hope wanna hit peoples kookies with a fried pack
That's three different flavors
Chocolate, vanilla, and strawberry wafers
He acting all hard bout to get beat up
I'll show him what time it is once I get his feet up
As soon as he fell off his beat down all I hear is
Thirteenth cell put the sheet down
Damn C.O.
What the hell do she know
Besides the fact that she wants her back dug out on the d-low
A workaholic with a fountain in the ink pen
House in the mountains and he stop drinking again
In the wee hours he's gotten farther
Maybe three showers getting hot and bothered
The wiz with her legs bent pregnant
God blessed the dick she wondered where her egg went
He got to hell but it's hard to drink with out it
And could use some kookies but trying not to think about it
Watch him bet on jazz from knowledge on file
Every other commercial college hoes gone wild
Soft batch he prefer the other bunch like they got for lunch
Chocolate fudge butter crunch
Don't mess with the ritz bitz, wheat thins, saltine triskits
Motts so's and cheese its
Catch sugar fits every time he sees a nice pair of
Chips ahoy double chocolate chunk
Something with the bubble and the junk in the trunk
Even the oreo
No matter what the weather
Always kept dipped in milk and stuck together
In the game he's shameless even uses a code name Famous Amos
Cheaper than a short stay at the day's inn and good like 25 cent oatmeal raisin
Give it up to who invented the camera
Never mind the ginger bread men and the grandma's
Make sure she don't wake from her dream
Killer get caught with a hand full of cream filled
Kookies
It might seem ill

I get no kick from champagne
Their alcohol doesn't thrill me at all
So tell me why shouldn't it be true?
I get a kick out of brew

There is only one beer left
Rappers screaming all in our ears like we're deaf
Tempt me, do a number on the label
Eat up all their MC's and drink 'em under the table

Like it's on me, put it on my tab, kid, however you get there
Foot it, cab it, iron horse it, you leaving on your face forfeit
I crush the mic hold it like the heat he might toss it
Told him tell they stole it, he told her he lost it
She told him get off it and a bunch other more shit

Getting money, DT's be getting no new leads
It's like he eating watermelon, stay spitting new seeds
It's the weed, give me some of what he's drooping off
Soon as he wake up choking like it was whooping cough

The group been soft, first hour at the open bar and their trooping off
He went to go laugh and get some head by the side road
She asked him to autograph her derriere, it read
To wide load, this yard bird taste like fried toad
Turned love villain take pride and code words

Crooked eye mold nerd geek with a cold heart
Probably still be speaking in rhymes as an old fart
Study how to eat, to dine by the pizza guy
No, he's not too fly to skeet in a skezzer eye

And squeeze her thigh, maybe giver her curves a feel
And the same way she feel it when she flow with nerves of steel
They call him super when they need their back or plumbing fixed
Powers only one left, the pack comes in six
Whatever happened to two and three

A hood tried to slide with four and five and got caught
Like, what you doing G?
Don't make 'em have to get cutting like truancy
Matter fact not for nothing right now you and me

Looser than a pair of Adidas, I hope you bought your spare tweeters
MC's sound like cheerleaders
Rapping and dancing like Red Head Kingpin
Dude, can we do this thing again no matter how be blinging

You do it for the smelly hubbies
Seeds know what time it is like it's time for Telletubbies
Few can do it, even fewer can sell it
Take it from the dude who wears mask like a tarded helmet

He plots shows like robberies
In and out, one, two, three, no bodies please
Run the cash and you won't get a wet sweatshirt
The mic is the shootie, nobody move, nobody get hurt

Bring heat, like the boy I'm going to war
Came in the door and everybody on the floor
A whole string of jobs like we are on tour
Every night on the score coming to your corner store