Kendall Payne

Hey, Alice are you completely
Satisfied with Wonderland
And all it's wonder?
Cause if you're not, you know I've
Heard that they're handing out a
money-back guarantee at the door.

Going blind to the pain,
Going deaf to the sight,
Going dumb to the cries,
Of the innocent life.

I read the paper,
And I drank all the juice
In my refridgerator, now I'm
Starved for knowledge,
And thirsty for the truth.
And in the pages I could
Sense all the longing in the world
I close my eyes, cause I'm longing too.

Going blind to the pain,
Going deaf to the sight,
Going dumb to the cries,
Of the innocent life.

Who knows your name,
anymore, anymore?
I'll say your name,
forever more, forever more.

Blind to the pain,
Going deaf to the sight,
Going dumb to the cries,
Of the innocent life,
Of the innocent life.

Digging deep, I feel my conscience burn
I need to know who and what I am
This hunger jolts me from complacency
Rocks me, makes me meet myself
Jacob walked a limp to remind him
Of the greater gift of the greater one
But when I fell, I fell to my own resources
How can I carry the truth, if I can't even crawl to you?


:

I wanna feel something sweeter than this sin
Cover me in leaves roll me over again
I've been everybody else now I wanna be
Something closer to myself

Paint me in a different light
Shed me yet another coat of skin
Mark me with ash until I'm clean again
Cause I'm so sick and tired
Of being sick and tired
I know I can love you, I know that I can


:

I wanna feel something sweeter than this sin
Cover me in leaves roll me over again
I've been everybody else now I wanna be
Something closer to myself

Digging deep, I feel my conscience burn
I need to know who and what I am
This hunger jolts me from complacency
Rocks me, makes me meet myself
Jacob walked a limp to remind him
Of the greater gift of the greater one
But when I fell, I fell to my own resources
How can I carry the truth, if I can't even crawl to you?


:

I wanna feel something sweeter than this sin
Cover me in leaves roll me over again
I've been everybody else now I wanna be
Something closer to myself

Paint me in a different light
Shed me yet another coat of skin
Mark me with ash until I'm clean again
Cause I'm so sick and tired
Of being sick and tired
I know I can love you, I know that I can


:

I wanna feel something sweeter than this sin
Cover me in leaves roll me over again
I've been everybody else now I wanna be
Something closer to myself

The summer sun has come to stay,
Bikinis, tans, outrageous legs,
They're all retarded and they all look the same,
And barbie's body is melting down,
On her face a big fat frown,
'cause Mr. Cellulite just moved into town.

Well me and B we hate supermodels,
It's not that we know anyone personally,
It's just that I'm tired of being compared.

The boys they come here,
With expectations for the summer,
And I refuse to take any part of this barbaric ritual,
'cause God has given me a mind,
That I will use from time to time,
And I got more on my head,
Than what's made by Paul Mitchell.

It's just that I'm tired of being compared

Was it worth the tears you cried...
to fit the size?

Think it over once or twice,
What lasts the longest in this life,
Character, or rock hard thighs?
And in the end do you believe,
That beauty lies in what you see?
'cause if you do, then baby
Youve been deceived.

Hey, Alice are you completely
Satisfied with Wonderland
And all it's wonder?
Cause if you're not, you know I've
Heard that they're handing out a
money-back guarantee at the door.

Going blind to the pain,
Going deaf to the sight,
Going dumb to the cries,
Of the innocent life.

I read the paper,
And I drank all the juice
In my refridgerator, now I'm
Starved for knowledge,
And thirsty for the truth.
And in the pages I could
Sense all the longing in the world
I close my eyes, cause I'm longing too.

Going blind to the pain,
Going deaf to the sight,
Going dumb to the cries,
Of the innocent life.

Who knows your name,
anymore, anymore?
I'll say your name,
forever more, forever more.

Blind to the pain,
Going deaf to the sight,
Going dumb to the cries,
Of the innocent life,
Of the innocent life.

40 days in Hollywood 40 nights in hell
How's life in your comfort zone?
Out here on sacred ground I'm doing swell
The new word is I'm crazy could have told you that before
But if you've got the guts to join me leave your sandals at the door
Because there's no turning back, no wasting time
No giving up on what I know is mine
No way I'm stopping not a chance I'm backing down
I've come to fight for mercy and take this angel town

I hear it so clear it pounds upon my heart
Who will give ear, and sacrifice to start
Am I alone? If so, it is well with me
Do you know that the truth will set you free

40 days in Hollywood, 40 nights in Hell
Sweet seduction plagues the streets I know now why she fell
But there's no time for distractions and I will not close my eyes
I'm hunting for the hurting, desperate in their cries

Boy know your place.
Lies do not become us.
Real is more attractive than a slick and polished mask.
Girl dig down deep,
I know there's more between us.
There's bound to be a question
You're just dying for me to ask.

If you can be honest
I can be too.
If you'll take the first step
I'll follow you through.
But no one wants to bleed.
No one wants to hide.
No one wants to hurt alone inside.

Child don't close your eyes
The truth contains much beauty
And though it scars your soul
It can heal the wounds it makes
You've been deceived to think
That pain is to be dreaded,
And you've got nothing left.
It'll give more than it takes.




If you can't find a peace
I'll help find it for you
I don't know how,
But one thing that's sure
Is I won't leave you now.

If you can be honest
I can be too
If you take the first step
I'll follow you through
No one wants to bleed
No one wants to hide
No one wants to hurt alone inside.

I know some things never change
but this can't be one of them.
and i don't think i can stand it
any longer...

(
)
Are you scared?
Are you scared?
Are you scared?
'cause if your scared
you're not alone
I once thought i was brave---
but i can't stop crying

sometimes i think im going crazy
But i am waiting patiently
though i fear it will all be in vain

(

)

It's not the time, it's not the place I am afraid (

)

They keep telling me, I'm not alone
They're all standing by me, but I am not my own
This thing is growing like a cancer I must kill
I am so confused, I don't know what I feel

I refuse to believe this is a child
It's not a person yet it takes quite a while
And guilt is great on my shoulders tonight
Could someone please tell me what is wrong and what is right
What is wrong and what is right, what is wrong and what is right

But I know it's life, I can't deny that it's life
Oh is it life? Can I deny this its life? I am afraid

What these years have brought me
What these years have taught me
Heartache and fame
A chance to change
A Hope to be stronger
That beauty can smolder
A stage and a curtain
That nothing's for certain
Oh these years have been hard on my bones

What this world has brought me
What this world has taught me
Senseless spinning
Never tie instead of winning
Ice cream for licking
The clock's always ticking
No one is free
Someone must have a key
Oh this world has been hard on my bones
All this time
I'd been seeking my own
Oh this road has been hard on my bones

What this love has brought me
What this love has taught me
Patience in battle
Who's in the saddle?
Joy and dispair
That I really do care
Uncertain desire
The risk going higher
Yeah this love has been hard on my bones

What this God has brought me
What this God has taught me
Passion and grace
How to stand in one space
Laughing at lillies
What truly fufils me
Death on a cross
It was I that was lost
Oh this God has been life to these bones
Oh this God has been life to my bones
Yes this God has been life to my bones

a modern day moses, waking the streets
with shouts of glory, blistered feet
hes met the maker, hes met the reason hes alive
and hes on fire inside

a modern day mother, living in the slums
feeding the hungrey, making sure the race gets run,
always asking if we fought with steady feet
she fights on her knees

let my people go

a modern day martin in a world of civil words exchange
but dreaming bigger, he thinks maybe he could make a change
hes heard the stories, he wants some of his own
and hes not alone.



the time is not the moments here, walk in faith or stand in fear
change the course of history, did you ever think
no one ever though --- who would have believed?

let my people go

a modern day me what have i become, what can i be?
if there is greatness out there to be acieved
i want to be more than someone who just passes through this lige
i want to stand up for what is right

Good week I've got
Gonna see him once again
Been working out, reading up
Be all smart and slim
Who'd knew I'd be this anxious
Who'd have guessed this horrid fate?
All I know is I
Have to be perfect by Thursday
Perfect by Thursday

I rarely get to see him
And his name is all I know
He smiles like a king
And that's all he'd dare to show
I'm faithfully attending
My motive almost pure
Reckless in my thinking
But it's his that I'm not sure

Perfect by Thursday
I'm planning the evening
I know what I'm wearing
And what I'll be singing
Perfect by Thursday

One day left
And it's not looking very good
I haven't seen much progress
To perfection like I should
But now I cannot quit
Because today could be the day
That all the effort
All the work decides to finally pay.

And then you will fall in love
I smile when you walk by
I laugh even louder
You don't even bother

I hold every memory
As sweet as a lemon
As loose as a fire

So now he's on the TV screen
He's catching for some man
Moved away and left me here
I don't understand
But I'm convinced that he'll be back
When I do least expect
Despite my opposition
I fear that I am correct

Perfect by Thursday
I'm sprinting to make it
If I have to fake it
You know I can take it

I'll tame this lion of flesh before the night is over
My love will not let me rest until my mind is sober
Reputations from my past chained so tight
You break free you break fast on my decision tonight

Formerly known as nothing and and no one
Formerly known as lost

I've been sold to lies I've been told by former generations
Who tell me what's worth having a hold on for cheap sensationss
But you ask me at this moment who I say I am
A new creation they don't have to understand

I will not be bound by what they tell me I can be
I will not stay silent I will speak my liberty

In the midst of my darkest hour you see my tear-stained face
This broken form that no longer feels power with no apparent place
But even when this world has turned her back on me
When it's cold where it once had burned
When my thoughts are frightening

You will never leave me

When I fail at living and loving when I fail you Lord
I want things that I know very well I cannot afford
When I feel like I have no purpose except to live and die
Or all they tell me is that I'm worthless why even try

I cannot be sure of my love for you
But in the midst of my doubt...you are true

The winds came by and they carried me away
At least that's what your momma said she'd say
Of course I knew that you would never believe
But baby sometimes even big girls are allowed to weep

Oh Brenda Gene my peanut butter queen
Innocent and bright don't think of me as mean
Sweet Brenda Gene for all you haven't seen
You know I hate to leave you fatherless at fourteen

I'm sure you think I've left you alone
Torn apart our happy home
But love, I never planned it this way
Never this soon and never this day



Heaven's quite a sight to see I'm sure you'll be here too
And though it's beautiful my dear it can't compare to you

I've got a new way of living now a little less of a lot
A little more of nothing
Thought you might have seen the change in me
Little quicker to listen little slower to speak

I was wrong when I said I was strong I am weak and I need
All that you have to give
I cannot keep the voices quiet inside
Hear them sing hear the scream, at least I know I'm alive

Now I am meeting myself and I am liking what I see
I am not afraid anymore Not afraid to be bored
Not afraid to be me

Every battle leads to another war
Every day I'm reminded of what I'm fighting for
It's never easy and it's never the same
But it's worth all I've got and so I'll give it again

Now I don't know why, I don't know why
But it makes me want to cry, cry

I am meeting myself and I am ready to see
Truth can break our heart that is when it will start
To set us free

I will show you love
like you’ve never loved before
I will go the distance
and back for more if you just say the word
'Cause you will come alive again and
call the trying times your friend
The pain that you have suffered through
will never get the best of you
You will hope in something real that
won’t depend on how you feel
When you call my name then I will
answer, answer
'Cause I am on your side
though the wind and waves
beat against your face
And you were on my mind
when the world was made
Trust in me my child,
Trust in me my child

Walk out on the water
where you have no control
So scared to death of failure
you sacrifice your soul, please let that go
'Cause you have climbed an uphill road,
You have worn a heavy load
You have cried through endless nights
and nearly given up the fight
Watched your dreams like falling stars the heartaches made you who you are
Now looking back you see that I have
always been there
I am on your side
though the wind and waves
beat against your face
And you were on my mind
when the world was made
Trust in me my child,
Trust in me my child

Where you gonna hide?
Where you gonna hide from Me?
Where you gonna go?
Where you gonna go that I can’t see?

'Cause I have heard you cry
and it breaks my heart for I love you so
I would never lie,
this is not the end
there is still a hope
I am on your side
though the wind and waves
beat against your face
You were on my mind
when the world was made
Trust in me my child,
Trust in me my child

So much deeper than the oceans is the heart of man
So much higher than the mountains
Are the things that I don't understand
Like why I'm crying over someone who will never give a damn

We have boarded up the basement for the storm has found its prey
I have bottled my emotions and saved them for a rainy day
Now I'll drink the bitter poison of a love that's been delayed

Since You've been gone, I can't fight it I can't fight it
I've tried for too long I can't hide it I can't hide it anymore

This has called for desperate measures
We have left our pride behind
We are aging with the hours of this superficial life
And I refuse to be a failure, I have to give it one more try

But I doubt that you are listening and I doubt that you are moved
I have doubted every step along this long and darkened journey
But I have never doubted you
Now the longing has awoken and I don't know what to do

Gather along the lines, Gather along the lines. You'll be safe inside so gather along the lines
No one has to know as long as you don't smoke those cigarettes
You can keep your heart of stone and say you forgive but you don't ever forget

We can't keep this up much longer, Grace is driving the hardest bargain
The perfect world we have construced keeps more people out than lets them come in

So let it shine if you've got any light left
Let it rise and sing as loud as you can get
We've got to live, we've got to laugh, we've got to love
We've got to learn to breath outside the lines
We got to learn to be outside the lines

Gather along the lines
Gather along the lines
Keep your prejudice and pride
Just gather along the lines

Everyone will think that you are so important to the Lord
But never bend you knee oh that wasted time you can't seem to afford
We were caught inside the bubble, some sense of family some sense we belonged
And when we pleased them they were happy but God forbid that we should ever do wrong

I don't think he's threatened when we ask questions when we have doubts and disbelief
I don't think he's angry when we are human that's what he made us to be

I am not a perfect girl, nor are you a perfect man
But we have found each other here inside this wild and crazy world
And somehow make a perfect match

You bring out the worst in me but it's the side I need to see
And through the conflicts and the difference and damage done
We are strong and still are one

You will fail me, you will fail me again and again and again
And I will fail you, I will fail you again and again and again
Again and again and again
But we will learn to love in spite of failure
Yes we will learn to love because of failure
And we will stay together

We are broken human fools, we are selfish, we are cruel
But there is hope for the exception to someday become the rule
Let it start with me, let it start with you

Are you lonely for a friend? Are you lonely for a fantasy?
Do you feel like talking back at me or would you like it quiet now?
Well its hard to understand, what with all my inexperience
You say I've lost my innocence, but I haven't missed it if it's gone
Would you kindly take my hand feel it pulsing with complexity
The days are dawning dark on me since you been round you brought me down to your size

You're so small no one can fit inside your world

And it kinda makes me mad, but it mostly makes me sad for you
The hoops that you keep jumping through will trip you up or break you down
When you find yourself alone when they've all betrayed and broke your trust
You'll see the truth inside of us was always there, just you were scared to believe

And you like it, you like it that way

And you want for me to hurt just like you have hurt for countless years
With no one there to catch your tears, it is justified in your mind
I am sorry for your chains, but I will not wear them as my own
From here I think we'll walk alone but I doubt you'll find your peace of mind when I'm gone

When you've been wounded, deeply wounded by a friend
You wonder when, if ever, you will trust again
When you've been broken, deeply broken by a man
You wonder when, if ever, you will love again

Truth be told I'm not quite sure when things went right
But the darkest tunnel always has a distant light
And I've arrived, yes I've arrived and right on time
You were there to greet me arms stretched open wide
You were there to meet me on the other side

Now I believe in something it's been a long time coming
It may not mean that much to you but it means all the world to me
I'm belonging somewhere it took me time to get here
But now that I've become a part of you I never want to leave

When you've been hurting, deeply hurting all alone
You wonder when, if ever, you will find a home
When you've been searching, endless searching for the truth
You wonder when, if ever, it will search for you
You wonder if someone will ever search for you

Don't touch me, Don't touch me there (2x)
I am bare and he is staring, we are trapped and caged like animals
I am small it isn't fitting. I am screaming but no one's listening
Don't touch me, Don't touch me there

I forgot what it feels like to feel safe, I forgot what it feels like to feel brave
A shattered soul never heals, this heart of flesh has turned to steal
I've forgotten how to feel

He liked her, he liked her that way
He broke her she has never been the same
Can you imagine? Can you fathom such a place where evil spreads it's seed?
It's upon us, It's beneath us, It's up to us to do something
He liked her, he liked her that way?

Listen little children to the story of a girl who found her knight and shining armor
When he saved her from the dragon he was strong and not afraid that there was
Smoke and there was fire and they lived happily ever after in his castle far away
Listen little children to the story of a girl

Such a lovely day to carry on your shoulders
It turned from blue to grey and you seem so much older
But its worth all the money in the world to find a way back to normal
If there's such a place

The doctor called your name and things became so sober
I suppose the price we'll pay will be worth it when it's over
But it takes every effort to believe in the unseen when you see clearly
That thing's are not okay

Well I know you are frightened, and I know you are angry
And I know you tired of the unknown
But I am beside you, and I will remind you
That you don't have to go it alone

Seems a tailor made sickness for your sins dear
If you planned your life away we never would be standing here
But with an impending bitter end
You have learned the lesson how
The sweet is in the now

Well I know you are frightened, and I know you are angry
And I know you tired of the unknown
But I am beside you, and I will remind you
That you don't have to go it alone
Alone, Alone, We are not alone, Alone, Alone, Never, Not alone

There are no guarantees, no promise they can make us
Our faith's a fighting seed planted deep in desperate trust
I will take every moment I can get
And won't regret I share your name
To Love is worth the pain

How long have I been dreaming? Who forgot to wake, to wake me up?
I know it sounds crazy but daddy now I think I'm in love
Cause when he steps in the room my heart begins to pound

You said, "Never settle," you promised there was one out there for me
It's true, I might have doubted but he's standing here and now I believe
Yes, I know you'll be proud of the man that chose me

It's elementary to the wise, for the fool in full disguise
Beggars bow and poets kneel, and as for me? it's finally real

I will always love you and I will always be your little girl
None could come between us, you'll forever be the first man in my world
But when he smiles I can see how much he reminds me of you
A man of faith, a man of strength, who loves me like you do

It's all the time I've spent in tears, worth the heartache, worth the fears
To stand beside him on this day after you give me away

How long have I been sleeping? Who forgot to wake, to wake me up?
Daddy, he's amazing, he's everything that I've been dreaming of
And now he has become my very best friend

Were we ready, who's to say the answer?
Who is ever ready for these things?
No one could prepare us for the laughter
No one could prepare us for the pain

You feel like burning embers
You feel like coming home
You feel like my forever
And that's all I need/want/have to know

Every night I ask for your forgiveness
In grown up skin I still act like a child
I can make believe that I am flawless
You're close enough to see the cracks I hide

You have caused me tears of joy relentless
I cannot now imagine life without
I owe you more than humble words could confess
I love you more than I even know how

You feel like burning embers
You feel like coming home
You feel like my forever
And that's all I need to know

You feel like Christmas morning
You feel like summer rain
You feel like holy waters
That rinse away my stains

You feel like children singing
You feel like midnight calm
You feel like breathing deeply
Until the storm is gone

Don't let your life slip through the cracks in your hand
If you hold on tight you might stand a chance

Don't be yourself if you're not someone you like
There's hope for change in anyone's life

The paper skin I'm living in it tells the truth, it proves I'm broken
This paper skin, so frail so thin and every touch can tear me open
La la la la la la la la la, La la la la la la la la

Don't make your love suffer insecurity
Trade the baggage of "self" to set another man free

Don't dream out loud you never know who will hear
Delight in bringing you down and fill your head with their fears

On paper skin words won't rescind they sink too deep and slice me open
In paper skin I never mend it bends me back until I'm broken
La la la la la la la la la, La la la la la la la la