[spoken] [KG:] Dude, we gotta fuckin' write something new. C'mon. [strums] [JB:] I don't like that. So far ba--, off to a bad start. [strums again] [JB:] Better, closer, warmer. [strums again] [JB:] That's it. Okay. [sung] I love ya baby but all I can think about is Kielbasa sausage, your butt cheeks is warm. I check my dipstick, you need lubrication honey, My kielbasa sausage has just got to perform. Now get it on! I see you walkin', but all I can think about is Dianetics, your butt cheeks is warm. I check my dipstick, you need lubrication honey, My kielbasa sausage has just got to perform. Now I've been set loose-ah, I'm shooting my juice-ah, Right in your caboose. Now fuckin' get it on! Now get it on. Get it on! Dianetics Jr. much better than Krishna, Dianetics Jr. much better indeed, And all you people here you're tremendous, (Except the people in the back), And you're smokin' up a big-ass bowl of weed With me, me and KG. All right! Oh yeah, All right! Oh my God! All the ladies in the house say yeah (yeah), C'mon, you muthafucka say a prayer (prayer), When ya fight, ya gotsta fight fair, You muthafucka, ho, you muthafucka, You know what time it is? Tenacious D time, you muthafucka, go! Fuck yeah! Yeah, yeah! [spoken] Dude, that was TNT.
(spoken) Kyle Gass: Jack. Jack Black: Yeah? KG: Do you think some people... do you think that there's some people that aren't really... that are actually robots, living among us? JB: No. KG: ...that we can't tell... JB: No, we dont have the technology yet. But Rage. Rage. Rage... KG: Yeah? JB: You know what I was thinking? Stop playing. I was thinking of a fucking brilliant song. KG: Yeah? JB: Check it out, just do what I do. KG: Ok. JB: Just play this note. And then we both keep playing... just keep both playing that note. Every once in a while bend it. And that's it... and just remember who wrote that song. Me baby, me. KG: Oh.. JB: See, it's fucking simple. That's one song in the bank. Next song. KG: Is, uh? JB: Next song! KG: How can? But it's one note... JB: Next! KG: Anybody could have wrote it, anybody could have done that. Its one song, its one note. JB: But guess who did write it... ME! KG: Yeah but did you... did you write the, the listen... JB: Dude I did, I told you to do the bending every once in a while! KG: Oh yeah you did. JB: Woohoo, I win! KG: Shit. JB: I win. One to nothin'!
This is the greatest and best song in the world´s... Tribute. Long time ago me and my brother Kyle here, we was hitchhikin´ down a long and lonesome road. All of a sudden, there shined a shiny demon in the middle of the road. And he said!! "Play the best song in the world, or I´ll eat your soul." Well me and Kyle, we looked at each other, and we each said... "Okay." And we played the first thing that came to our heads, . Just so happened to be, The Best Song in the World, it was The Best Song in the World. Look into my eyes and it´s easy to see One and one make two, two and one make three, It was destiny. Once every hundred-thousand years or so, When the sun doth shine and the moon doth glow And the grass doth grow... Needless to say, the beast was stunned. Whip-crack went his schwumpy tail, And the beast was done. He asked us. "(snort) Be you angels?" And we said, "Nay. We are but men." Rock!! Ahhh, ahhh, ahhh-ah-ah, Ohhh, whoah, ah-whoah-oh! This is not The Greatest Song in the World, no. This is just a tribute. Couldn´t remember The Greatest Song in the World, no, no. This is a tribute, oh, to The Greatest Song in the World, All right!! It was The Greatest Song in the World, All right!! It was the best muthafuckin´ song the greatest song in the world. And the peculiar thing is this my friends the song we sang on that fateful night it didn´t actually sound anything like this song!! This is just a tribute. You gotta believe me!! And I wish you were there!! Just a matter of opinion. Ah, fuck!! Good God, God lovin´!! So surprised to find you can´t stop it. All right!! All right!!
High above the mucky-muck, castle made of clouds, There sits Wonderboy, sitting oh so proudly. Not much to say when you're high above the mucky-muck. Yeah, yeah. Wonderboy, what is the secret of your power? Wonderboy, won't you take me far away from the mucky-muck man? [spoken] Now it's time for me to tell you about Young Nastyman, archrival and nemesis of Wonderboy, with powers comparable to Wonderboy. What powers you ask? I dunno how 'bout the power of flight? That do anything for ya? That's levitation, holmes. How 'bout the power to kill a yak from 200 yards away... with mind bullets! That's telekinesis, Kyle. How 'bout the power to move you? [sung] History of Wonderboy and Young Nastyman, Riggah-goo-goo, riggah-goo-goo. A secret to be told, a gold chest to be bold, And blasting forth with three-part harmony, yeow! Wonderboy, what is the secret of your power? Wonderboy, won't you take me far away from the mucky-muck man? [spoken] Well, Wonderboy and Young Nastyman joined forces; they formed a band the likes of which have never been seen, and they called themselves Tenacious D. That's right, [sung] Me! And KG! [KG (spoken):] That's me. [sung] We're now Tenacious D! Come fly with me, fly! Wonderboy, what is the secret of your power? Wonderboy, won't you take me far away from the mucky-muck man, Oh! [spoken] Take my hand! Young Nastyman, and we'll fly! Bring out your broadsword. There's the hydra. Slice his throat! And grab his scroat. You take the high road, I'll take the low. There, the crevasse, Fill it with your mighty juice.
(spoken) (KG:) We should talk about the hard fucking though. (JB:) Hard fucking? (KG:) Because I think it's a pretty common complaint. (JB:) (laughing) The ladies don't really like the hard fucking. (KG:) You feel like your giving them some extra juice. (JB:) They're not into that. (KG:) No. You think your like, taking 'em to the limit. (JB:) Maybe they are though, in to that. You know what the test is? You just say, "Get on top honey, you do what you like." (KG:) (laughing) (JB:) And then sometimes she'll be fucking you really hard. It's like wait, "Well you like that? You like that? Slow down I'm gonna spurt! Agh! Um, sorry. You shouldn't have fucked me so hard." (laughing)
This is a song for the ladies but fellas... listen closely
You don't have to fuck her hard in fact sometimes that's not right to do.. Sometimes u got to make some love and fuckin give her some smooches too.. Sometimes you got to squeeze.. Sometiems you got to say "Please".. Sometimes you gotta say "Hey," "I'm gonna fuck you.. softly" "I'm gonna screw you gently" "I'm gonna hump you sweetly" "I'm gonna ball you discreetly" and then you say "Hey, I brought you flowers" and then you say "Wait a minute Sally," "I think I got sometin' in my teeth could you get it out for me?" That's fuckin' teamwork! What's your favorite posish? That's cool with me, It's not my favorite but I'll do it for you. What's your favorite dish? I'm not gonna cook it but I'll order it from ZANZIBAR! And then I'm gonna love you completely Then I'll fucking fuck you discreetly and then I'll fuckin bone you completely but then I'm gonna fuck... you hard..... Hard........
Climb upon my faithful steed, Then we gonna ride, gonna smoke some weed. Climb upon my big-ass steed, And ride, ride, ride.
Eeeee-eee-eee-eeeee-eeeee-eee-eee-eeeee-eeeee-eeeee-eeeee, What's the name of the song, Explosivo! Don't know what it's about, But it's good to go. What's the name of my girlfriend I don't know, But she's built like the shit And she's good to go, go, She's good to go, She's good to go.
We are fuelled by Satan, Yes we're schooled by Satan. Fuelled by Satan! Writin' those tasty riffs just as fast as we can. Schooled by Satan!
We were the inventors of the cosmic astral code. We've come to blow you away, We've come to blow your nose. We've come to fuckin' blow, We've come to blow the show. We've come to fuckin' blow, You know it, you know it!
Eeeee-eee-eee-eeeee-eeeee-eee-eee-eeeee-eeeee-eeeee-eeeee, What's the name of the song, Explosivo! Don't know what it's about But it's good to riddle-ah!
[spoken] I am not one of you. I come from an ancient time. I am known as The Kicker of Elves. I am also known as The Angel Crusher!
Dio has rocked for a long, long time, Now it's time for him to pass the torch. He has songs of wildebeests and angels, He has soared on the wings of a demon.
It's time to pass the torch, You're too old to rock, no more rockin' for you. We're takin' you to a home, But we will sing a song about you.
And we will make sure that you're very well taken care of. You'll tell us secrets that you've learned. Raow! Your sauce will mix with ours, And we'll make a good goulash baby. Dio, time to go! You must give your cape and scepter to me. And a smaller one for KG. Go! Go! Dio! Dio!
[Jack] Oh, my god. I've done it. Kage, come here I want you! (오, 세상에. 해냈어. Kage, 이리 와 봐!) [Kage]What?! What?! God! I was sleeping dude! What are you talkin about? (뭐? 뭐? 제발! 나 자고있었어 이놈아! 무슨말 하는거야?) [Jack] Oh, my god... (오, 신이시여...) [Kage] What? (뭐?) [Jack] I did it. (해냈어.) [Kage] What'd You Do? (뭘 해냈는데?) [Jack] I've done it.. I fuckin did it. (그걸 해냈다고... 염병할.) [Kage] What? (뭐?) [Jack] The most powerful tool in singing technology since yodeling, dude. Oh, my god, inward singing! (요들 이래로 가장 강력한 창법이지, 이놈아. 바로 들이쉬며 노래하기다!) [Kage] What? (뭐?) [Jack] Check it out. It's an invention and it makes non-stop rocking possible. (이것 봐, 이건 주구장창 노래부르는 걸 가능하게 만드는 혁명이야.) Think about it, man! Rock singers are only rockin you half the time, (생각해봐! 락 가수는 딱 반만큼만 노래부를수 있지,) the other time they're... they're... they're... they're... breathing in but not any more baby! HAHAHA... not with inward singing. Check it out... (나머진머진머진머진 숨쉬어야 되지만 이젠 아냐 Baby! 하하하... 들숨창법덕택에. 보라고..)
*Jack breathing*
[Singing] And then I start some lyrics and you (내가 가사를 부르고) [Inward Singing] Can't believe I'm singing (넌 내가 노래하는 걸 못믿지) [Singing] And I'm never fucking stopping and I'm (난 절대 멈추지 않아) [Inward Singing] Always fucking singing (몇날며칠 노래하지) [Singing] Now you know that I will never (넌 이제 내가 더이상) [Inward Singing] Stop the fucking singing (노래를 멈추지 않을 걸 알지) [Singing] I'm like a fucking one man band, I'm like a fucking one man (난 솔로 밴드가 좋아, 난 솔로 밴드가) [Inward Singing] Band! (좋아!)
[Jack]And I can sing like that all fuckin night... (난 이렇게 밤 새도록 노래부를 수 있어) [Kage] Wow... it wasn't really non-stop though. There was a slight... (와우... 비슷하긴 하지만 진정한 논스톱이 아니었...) [Jack]AHH shut up! It is non stop and theother thing is that when I'm fucking singing in it sounds even BETTER than when I'm singing out! (아~ 닥쳐! 이건 논스톱인데다가 노래까지 더 잘 부르게 해줘!) Shut up! Fuck you! You fuckin dick! Always ney saying everything I create! You piece of shit, you create something like inward singing! You fucking shit you fucking sit in your tower... (닥쳐! 엿 먹어! 씨X 새X! 내가 만든건 뭐든 토달지! 똥 조각, 이 씨X 똥 염병 네 탑에서 썩을...)
*Kage Laughing*
[Jack]...and fucking nap... what's funny? You fucking bitch! (병신같은 낮잠에...뭐가 웃겨? 이 개자식아!)
Last week, Kyle quit the band, Now we're back together, uh. Misunderstanding, didn't understand. It doesn't matter, now we're back together again. A-la la la la la. Couldn't split up Kato and Nash. (that's true) Couldn't split up Tango and Cash. That's also true! This is our song of exultant joy because We only came to kick some ass. Rock the fuckin' house and kick some ass. What we gonna do with all the cash? Smoke hash, and then we thrash. We'll throw a big ol' bash y'all. And everyone is invited to the bash. And everyone you're all invited to the bash! C'mon Kyle, one time c'mon! [skat]
The road is fuckin' hard, The road is fuckin' tough-ah, There's no question that-eh It is rough, rough stuff. It's the fuckin' road my friend But it's the only road I know. When I'm lunchin' on a tasty boosh Right after the show. You g-go go go!
The road is fuckin' hard, It's also really fuckin' tough, There's no question that It don't take no guff. The road is a be-a-itch my friend But it's the only fuckin' road I know, When I'm snackin' on a tasty boosh Right after the show. You g-go go go!
I met a tasty baby in Michigan. We screwed two times then I left. Sometimes I think of my baby in Michigan. Why can't I stay in one place For more than two days. Why?! Because I'm talkin' about the road. [5X] Road!
KG: Do you think that um, do you think that when the album, when this is out... JB: Yeah? KG: Do you think it will make us um, more attractive to the ladies? JB: Pshh, yeah, in fact, I been getting ready. KG: Yeah? JB: Yeah, I been doin cock pushups. KG: Cock Pushups? JB: Yeah. KG: What are those? JB: Its where you fuckin lay down flat on the ground. KG: Yeah... JB: And then you let your boner lift you up off the ground. KG: N...no, that's, that'd be impossible. Your cock can support your whole weight? JB: Well not at first... KG: Yeah? JB: But over time. KG: Hmm...how many pushups can you do? JB: ...cock pushups? KG: Yeah...I guess, you could only do one really. JB: Yeah, well one is all ya need
Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee Lee Lee Lee Lee Lee Lee Lee Lee, We're talkin' fuckin' Lee. I had a friend named Lee, He cast a spell a spell on me. If me and Lee and KG could be three, Flyin' free Tenaciously, Skinny-dippin' in a sea of Lee, I'd propose on bended knee To Lee Lee Lee, Lee Lee Lee, Lee Lee, Lee Lee Lee, Lee Lee Lee, Lee Lee, Le-Lut-Le-Le-Le-Lee Lee Lee, Le-Lut-Le-Le-Le-Lee Lee, If me, and Lee, and KG, (that's me) Could be three, (could be three) Plant a tree, (plant a tree) Just for Lee, (just for Lee) Just for Lee, (Lee) Just for Lee! Lee, Lee, Lee: ["Psycho" Knife Song style, 16X] Leeee, Leeee, Leeee: LEE!
JB: BRRRRRRRRRRING....BRRRRRRRRRRRRING KG: *Click sound* Two Kings. JB: Hey Kage. KG: Hey. JB: How's it goin? KG: Good, good. JB: What're ya doin? KG: Oh God, I was just, I w- JB: I love you. KG: ...what'd you say? JB: Said I love you,man. Just wanted to say it. KG: Hey, thanks. Thank you. That's awesome, fuckin awesome...I mean, uh, that's cool you can, you can say that. JB: ...Don't you have something to say? KG: No...oh I mean, I uh, I like you.I like you too dude. JB: Whoa, like? OH HO HO MAN! I'm glad I fuckin did this test on you. The friendship test. KG: What? JB: No, man KG What are you talkin about? JB: What happened before, when I said I loved you,that was a test. Because man I coulda made a total ass of myself if I hadn't done this test on you. *whistle* hoo hoo! KG: But you don't? JB: Boy! KG: You don't, really love me? JB: Dude listen. You fuckin passed the test ok? But barely. Ya know what you got? KG: What? JB: F plus. Click
Friendship is rare, Do you know what I'm sayin' to you? Friendship is rare. My derriere, When you find out much later That they don't really care. It's rare to me, can't you see? It's rare to me, can't you see? Oh shit there's a bear, Could you hand me that shotgun buddy, Also that chair? We're fighting a bear Now your life's in grave danger And you don't even care. It's rare to me, can't you see? It's rare to me, can't you see? It's rare to me, Say a prayer for me, 'Cause it's rare to be In Tenacious D. Friends will be friends They're running naked in the sand, Friends holding hands Will someday surely form a band, Friends will be friends They say that friends are friends To the bitter end. Long-as-there's-a-record-deal-we'll-always-be-friends! Long-as-there's-a-record-deal-we'll-always-be-friends! Friends will be friends They're running naked in the sand, Friends holding hands Will someday surely form a band, Friends will be friends They say that friends are friends To the bitter end. Long-as-there's-a-record-deal-we'll-always-be-friends! Long as there's a record deal we'll always be friends, yeah
JB: God, I'm fuckin hungry. Let me check the fridge... Dude, where's my fuckin schnitzel? Hey, wake up. Wake up you asshole, wake up. KG: Whahahat? Wh? JB: Wake up. KG: What? JB: You ate my fuckin schnitzel. KG: What? JB: You ate my fuckin schnitzel. KG: Well it was in there. If you put it in there, then it's fair game. JB: Yeah? KG: For anybody that wants to eat it. JB: Well then maybe this is fair game. WOW! KG: Ow God, Hey! JB: Yeah, that's right its a karate chop! KG: What're ya doin? JB: Well if you didn't like that, how 'bout this? KIKAY! KG: OW!
With karate I'll kick your ass Here to Tiennamen Square. Oh yeah, muthafucka, I'm 'onna kick your fuckin' derriere. You broke the rules, Now I'll pull out all your pubic hair, You muthafucka. You muthafucka.
Kyle betrayed me And then he lied tried to hide And I died deep inside And you know the reason why.
I'm 'onna kick your ass From here to right over there. Oh yeah muthafucka, I'm 'onna kick your fuckin' derriere. You broke the rules, Now I'll pull out all your pubic hair, You muthafucka. You muthafucka.
[sung] It doesn't matter if it is good, It only matters if it rocks. The main thing that we do is to rock your socks off. There's no such thing as a rock prodigy, 'Cause rock 'n roll is bogus, right KG? (right!) Only thing that really matters is a classical sauce. And that's why me and KG are classically trained To rock your fuckin' socks off! Give 'em a taste KG. [KG (spoken):] Okay.
That is Bach and it rocks It's a rock block of Bach That he learned in the school Called the school of hard knocks!
Give it up for KG, give it up for me, Give it up for KG, give it up for me, Give it up for rock, Give it up for blues, Give it up for everything that is not to lose. Now rock your socks off woman, We'll rock your shit up y'all. Give it up children now to freak your shit out! All right!
[spoken] Now I know what a lot of you are sayin': "I just figured out what I'm 'onna do with the rest of my days. I'm 'onna get me an oversized guitar, gain forty pounds and be the next D. " Well I got sour news for you, jack. It ain't that easy. For instance, are you willing to make the commitment to wakin' up at the crack a' noon, for deep-knee rock squats!? Seven or eight at a time!? In a row? How 'bout are you willing to make the commitment to rock-hard tasty abs washer-board style? Glistening in the sun. How 'bout are you willin' to make the commitment, wakin' up, goin' okay, it's gig time, what t-shirt am I gonna wear? Can't decide: Can't decide: Brain aneurysm! We've been through so much bullshit just to be here tonight to rock your fuckin' socks off. And all we ask in return is so precious little. All we're askin' you to do is drop trou and squeeze out a Cleveland Steamer on my chest.
[sung] 2-3-4, Give it up for KG, give it up for me, Give it up for KG, give it up for me, Give it up for rock, give it up for blues, Give it up for everything that is not to lose. Now rock your socks off woman, We'll rock your shit up y'all. Give it up children won't you freak your shit out! All right! [ad-lib hollers & screams]
Kage, (yeah) Lets go to this drive through,(oh good im starvin) (may i help you) Yeah, umm, uhh (can i have your order) yeah, uhh, im looking at the menu uhh, (would you like special curly fries?) please dont, dont, dont offer me anything, ill tell you what i want, (ok) umm,ok you know how you have the six piece nuggets (the..the six piece nuggets?) just uhh, can ya just give me four nuggets, im tryin ta.. (that comes i six or twelve piece) shut up and listen to my order take the six nuggets and throw two of them away im just wanting a four nugget thing, im tryin to watch my calerie intake (that comes in six or twelve piece) PUTT TWO OF THEM UP YOUR ASS and give me four chicken McNuggets (alright ,a six peice nugget) then can i have a junior western bacon chi,a JUNIOR western bacon chi, im trying to watch my figure (a western bacon cheeseburger) a JUNIOR western bacon chi, (would you like that with onions) no onions, (western bacon sheese, twelve and six piece nuggets) and im gunna go with a fillett of fish sandwich since that has less calleries cuz its fish,now if you could take a cokacola and just go half cokacola half diet coke,cuz im tryin to watch my figure tryin to lose some of the weight (you want half cokacola half diet coke?) and a SMALL, A SMALL, chocolate shakecuz im tryin to watch my figure not a large a small (it comes in small, medium, large) ummm, also a small seasoned curly, SMALL seasoned curlys (ok ok, a small seasoned curly) umm, fuck my ass, what else give me uhh alright cherries jubilee and thats it wait kage what do you want? uhhh, jeez let me have uhh ithink i want the regular western bacon cheeseburger large shake umm seas... AUGHHH god come on with the order im i ahh you take forever thats all i want thats all i want good how much is that sir (that will be uhhh... $14.75 at the window please drive up.) do you have any money oh shoot yeah i got.. you have som...i got.. give it to me ok we only have uhh alright im gunna need to cancel the last two things on the order (ok cancel...) ok thank you lets go
[spoken] Damn, a hard day's rockin'. Better slip off ma shoes. Maybe give a little stretch, and a bend. Dip m'toe to jacuzzi, baby. Slip out this book: The Buttress of Windsor. Ho ho ho, who's this? How's it goin'? [sung] That's the first thin' I say to you. How's it goin'? Are you flowin'? Listen honey, Thinkin' 'bout a couple things to say to you, Showin', growin', Man I'd like to place my hand upon your fuckin' sexy ass and squeeze. And squeeze! Take off your blouse, And your underpants, Then take a look, 'Cause here me and KG come naked, Out of the side-hatch, With the oils and perfume and incense. Now you're groovin', Put on a cool '70s groove. A funky groove to fuck to. A funky groove to fuck to. Me, me and KG, It's all about sex supreme, We likes to cream jeans. (sex) Have you ever been worked on By two guys who are hot for your snatch? (sex) That's what I'm offerin' you. You step into our room, And then you smell the perfume, You lay upon our roundish bed, And then you feel a tickling on your head. It's KG with the feather and the French tickler, Look out baby he got the tools. And then you feel sumpin' down by your feet. It's me, it's JB, I'm suckin' upon your toes. We don't mind sucking on toes! Good luck finding a boyfriend who sucks toe, ow! Havin' sex with me and KG, Now you're talkin' double team supreme. Let's roll! Oh! [2-part:] Ahh, oh! What! Yeah! Huh! Nah! Oh! Ah, that's it, that's right, ohmygah, oh-I-think-I'm-gonna, Ohh! Deht! Deht! Eeee! ...Splooge! [spoken] That was the one. [KG:] Hail Satan! [JB:] Hail Satan! [KG:] Hail Satan! [JB:] Hail Satan!
All you people up there in City Hall, You're fuckin' it up for the people that's in the streets. This is a song for the people in the streets, Not the people of City Hall. All you motherfuckers in the streets it's time to rise up, Come along children and fuckin' rise!
Lots of times when me and KG are watchin' All the fuckin' shit that goes down at City Hall, We get the feeling we should fuck shit up, Yeah we should fuckin' start a riot. A Riot!
We'd have 'em screaming in the streets, we'd have 'em tippin' over shit and breakin' fuckin' windows of small businesses, and settin' fuckin' fires! and settin' fuckin' fires! and settin' fuckin' fires!
(spoken) And then after the smoke has cleared, and the rubble has been swept away, me and KG will peek out our heads. We've been watching the riots on a monitor twenty floors below sea level, from a bunker.
We did it Rage-Kage, we beat the bastards of City Hall! (laughs) But now what will we do? We must rebuild. But who will lead us in the rebuilding process? Man, it's got to be someone with the know-how and the elbow grease to lead us to a new land. No, not me and KG, we don't have the cognitive capacity to lead... Alright, we'll do it!
(sung) We'll lead as Two Kings, We'll lead as Two Kings. Ahhhaaa (Kings, we'll lead as Two Kings) Ah-ha ah-how, We'll lead as Two Kings.
(spoken) The first decree is to legalize marijuana. The tyranny and the bullshit's gone on too long. You old fuckin' shrivs who blocked its legalization, you're banished from the land!
(sung) We'll lead as Two Kings, We'll lead as Two Kings. Ahhhaaa (Kings, we'll lead as Two Kings) Ah-ha ah-how, Lead as Two Kings.
(spoken) The second decree: no more pollution, no more car exhaust, or ocean dumpage. From now on, we will travel in tubes!
(sung) We'll lead as Two Kings, oh, yeah, We'll fuckin' lead as Two Kings. (spoken) Get the scientists working on the tube technology, immediately. (Tube technology) Chop, chop, let's go.
(spoken) Third decree: no more... rich people... and poor people. From now on, we will all be the same... ummm, I dunno, I gotta think about that (sung) We'll lead as Two Kings Ah yeah, ah yeahhhahahaha. Ha-ha-ho-hee, ha-ha-ho-hee-ha-ha-ho-ho-ho-ho.
(spoken) (JB:) Oh my God. (KG:) Ahh... What? (JB:) Dude, the red phone is flashing. (KG:) Oh, yeah. (JB:) Let me scoop that up. Hello? Two Kings. (KG:) Who is it? (JB:) What?! No! No fucking way! (KG:) What? (JB:) Rage, there's a potato famine in Idaho, you gotta go down there! (KG:) Oh my God... what? (JB:) Dude, I gotta stay here! (KG:) Why do I have to go? (JB:) Please! Please! (KG:) Oh, God, okay. (JB:) Awesome... is he gone? Alright, emergency meeting of Parliament. All right Parliament, I know this is fucked up, But Rage, he can't be King anymore. Dudes, he's encroaching on my decrees! Seriously, let's make him Duke. A kick ass Duke. Or leader formerly known as King, but-- uh-oh he's comin' back...
(sung) We'll lead as Two Kings, oh yes We'll really lead as Two Kings.
(spoken) (KG:) Uh, dude? (JB:) Rage. (KG:) I went all over Idaho... (JB:) Yeah? (KG:) Uh, plenty of potatoes everywhere. (JB:) What? There was no famine? (KG:) Yeah, there was no famine, no. (JB:) Dude. (KG:) I don't know what's uh... (JB:) A toast... (KG:) A toast... (JB:) Long live the D. (KG:) Long live the D. (clinking of glasses) (JB:) Long live me. I'm sorry, I poisoned your wine. (KG:) What? (JB:) For the good of the land. (KG:) You p-- I poisoned yours... huh heh, as well. (JB/KG:) Noooooooooo!!!!! No!
(sung) City, city, city, city, city, city, shitty. Shitty, city, shitty, shitty, city, city, shitty. Hall, hall, hall, hall, hall, hall, hall, hall.
People inside me are askin' me to smoke up City Hall, 'Cause no one here is talkin'. People inside me are askin' me to blow up City Hall, 'Cause no one here is rockin'.
People inside me are askin' me to blow up City Hall, 'Cause everyone is Rock-'em Sock-'em Robots. Everyone is Rock-'em Sock-'em Robots. Everyone is Rock-'em Sock-'em GO! OH!
(spoken) (JB:) Don't- cut that part out.
(KG:) We've got it.
(JB:) Um, do you believe in God? (KG:) I believe, I believe. (JB:) You do? (KG:) I believe in God. I believe in God. (JB: (laughs) Y'do-- (KG:) I believe in God. (JB:) Do you? (KG:) I believe in God.
(Malibu Nights (Hidden track)
(KG (spoken):) Yeah, but you didn't fuckin' come up with this one (KG starts playing) (JB (spoken):) I got some lyrics. (sung) Malibu nights, tangerine dreams, Malibu neighs, Malibu dreams, Malibu, makin' a poo. Stinky poo, lookin'd view. Because it's time for my breakfast, It's time for some cheese. It's time for the stink, time for the breeze, time for the... curreeeeees!