The government totally sucks You motherfucker The government totally sucks
Ben Franklin was a rebel indeed He liked to get naked while he smoked on the weed He was a genius but if he was here today The government would fuck him up his righteous A!
Now let me tell you something about the government (uh huh) They're fucking up the environment (say what?) They're taking all the fucking beautiful animals (yeah?) And making them fucking extinct (oh no!)
The government totally sucks You motherfucker The government totally sucks The government totally sucks
Cos the land of love and freedom, Is just a baby's breath away And if we hold hands together We can bring back the USA
The USAAAAAA, yeah! Bring back the USAAAA, yeah! The fucking USAAAA yeah! Bring back the US!
Government totally sucks! [Lee] That was amazing, you changed people's lives tonight! [JB] yeah it was awesome, compared to bullshit!
This is a song called the history of tenacious d And its not just a list of bullshit things That we've done in the past, But its a chronicling of our rise to POWER!
We ride with kings on mighty steeds Across the devil's plain We've walked with Jesus and his cross He did not die in vain No!
We' ve run with wolves We've climbed K2 even stopped a moving train We've travelled through space And time my friends to rock this house again Rock!
We ride we ride and we'll never subside We'll ride till the planets collide And if you say that we do not ride, I'll turn your fucking hide RIDE!
Kyle's fingers be silver
Jack's voice then be gold Both lest you think we're vain!
We know its the showcase and we don't care Tenacious D we reign....
We reign Supreme OH GOD!!!!!!!!!! Burrito supreme, And a chicken supreme and a Cutless Supreme Supreme Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!
Go now Kyle Go now Kyle SUpreme!!!!!!!!!! Go now Kyle Go now Kyle SUpreme!!!!!!!!!! Go now Kyle Go now Kyle Burrito supreme And a chicken supreme And a Cutless Supreme SUpreme
[Sasquatch] Arrgggghhhh! [JB] Arrrggghhhh! [Sasquatch] That`s good, lets go an adventure, [JB] Yeah, la la la [Sasquatch] I`ve got lots to show you, la la la [JB] Can i be a sasquatch too? la la la [Sasquatch] You already are la la la you`re my son JB, my wittle baby sass, la la la la la la la la la la la la [JB] Ahhh. [Sasquatch] Lets take a dip in the strawberry river, (la la la) [JB] Yay! [Sasquatch] C`mon! (C`mon baby lets go!)
Here we go, here we go, here we go, Ooh la la la, oo papagenu, he`s my papasass! Ooh la la la, oo papagenu, he`s my sassafrass! Here we go, here we go, here we go, Ooh la la la, oo papagenu, he`s my papasass! Ooh la la la, oo papagenu, he`s my sassafrass!
[JB] Wheeeee! [Sasquatch] We`re flying! [JB] We`re flying! [Sasquatch] Hold on boy!
[JB] Down where the sasquatch hide, In the misty mountainside, He`s got shiny diamonds that he`s got to protect, Look into the sasquatch eye, Did you know that sass could fly? Sasquatch is my daddy and he`s going to protect, me! Half man, half machine, On the cover of a magazine, Bigfoot is my father and he`s got to protect, me! These lyrics don`t make sense, Think i`ve found the evidence, That yeti is my papa and he wants to protect, me!
The mission is clear, I'm going over there I'm going to do the mission
I flip around the corner, flat as a pancake And then i- oh noo! A camera
Stay back here, devise a plan Dive into the bushes
Against all odds Infiltrate, storm the gates! storm the gates!
Ninja style, samuri (Storm the gates!) Metal pole, climb that shit (Storm the gates) Climb into that mother-fucker Now i'm climbin up, up on the roof I got cat-like reflexes
Against all odds Infiltrate, oh! storm the gates!
Two air-vents on the roof, thats what the guy was talkin a- Shit!
Electric Eye Infiltrate, storm the gates! storm the gates! storm the gates!
Car chase city, That's the name, Of my game. It was all proven, Now its totally lame! KG really fucking, Blew us some ass! Now we're fucking, Headed for a, Total collapse!
Car chase city, Roll away from a bus! Thought that we wasn't, But we totally was!
Car chase city, Now we're off on the map! Car chase city, Now I'm takin' a crap!
Now it's getting hairy, So we're changin' the key. Never underestimate, The power of E!
KG fuckin' put his foot on the gas! If I go to prison, got the Pick in my ass!
Fuck this shit! It's gone too far!
Kage pulled up at the end of the car! Car chase city, Now we're taking the lane! KG blew it, Now we're goin insane!
Let's rock! Let's roll! Let them try to fill up the hole! Let's rock! Let's roll! Car chase city patrol!
Car chase city! Car chase city-ah! Car chase city!
Let's rock! Let's roll! Car chase city patrol! Let's rock! Let's roll! Just a fuckin' rigmarole!
Uh!
Piss! Speed! Tremble! Oh! Aagh! Gas! Brakes! Spin it, go Kyle! So spin it, go Kyle! S'broke! Flip it! Gas! Nitro! Go!
Let's rock! Let's roll! Car chase city patrol! Let's rock! Let's roll! Just a fuckin' rigmarole!
Let's rock! Let's roll! Car chase city patrol! Let's rock! Let's roll! Rockin' was the ulti-mofo! Uh!
Car chase city! Car chase city! Car chase city! Car chase city!
[Host:] Hey guys, you're running a little late. There's no spot left. You got any new material?
[JB] What we got's gonna turn your brain to shit.
[KG] Dust off the stage, Open Mic Host. Step aside.
[Beelz] I am complete! 나는 이제 완벽하다! [Both] Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck! 제에에에에에엔자아아앙! [Beelz] yes you are fucked, shit out of luck 맞아 젠장이라고해야지! 네 빌어먹을 운도 끝이야! now i'm complete and my cock you will suck 난 이제 완벽해 내 거시기도 완벽해! the world will be mine and you're first in line 세계는 이제 내것이다 너희가 첫번째 희생자지! you brought me the pick and now you both shall die! 여기로 나를 불렀으니 이제 둘다 죽어라! [JB] Wait! wait!Wait! 잠깐 잠깐 잠깐 기다려! you mother fucker! 이 망할자식아! we challenge you to a rock off! 우리 락으로 대결하자 give us one chance to rock your socks off 우리에게 한번만 기회를 주면 너를 감동시켜주지 [Beelz] Fuck, fuck, fuck 젠장! 된장! 된장! the demon code prevents me 악마의 문서에는 써있구나 from declining a rock off challenge 락의 대결을 받아들이라고 what are your terms? what is the cash? 뭘 원해? 무엇을 걸거냐? [JB] If we win, you must take your sorry ass back to hell. 만약 우리가 이기면 닥치고 지옥으로 꺼져버려. and also you will have to pay our rent 그리고 우리 집세좀 내줘 [Beelz] And what i if win? 만약 내가 이기면? [JB] then you can take Kage back to hell... 그럼 케이지를 지옥으로 데려가도 좋아. [KG] What? 뭐? [JB] trust me Kage, its the only way, 날 믿어 케이지, 이게 유일한 방법이야. [KG] What the fuck are you talking about? 무슨 개소리를 하는거야? [JB] to be your little bitch. 이 돼지 같은 녀석을 말야 Fine! Let the rock off begin!hahahahaa 좋아! 락 대결을 시작하자! 하하하하 Im the devil i love metal! 나는 악마 메탈이 좋다! Check this riff it's fucking tasty 이걸로 맛좀봐라! i'm the devil i can do what i want, 나는 악마다 원하는건 뭐든지 할수 있어 whatever i got i'm gonna flaunt, 갖고 싶으면 뺏어버리지 there's never been a rock off i've ever lost 난 락대결에서 한번도 진적이 없어 i cant wait to take Kage back to hell 케이지를 얼른 지옥으로 데려가고싶네 i'm gonna fill him with my hot demon gel 이 젤처럼 꽉꽉 짜줘야지 i'll make him squeal like my scarlet pimpernel 그 다음엔 내 거시기에다 발라 박아줘야지 [JB] Noooooo! 안돼! cmon Kage bring the thundah 케이지 이제 우리차례야 [KG] there's just no way that we can win, 우리가 이길 방법이 없어 that was a masterpiece. 저건 완전 대박이었다고 [JB] listen to me 들어봐, [KG] he rocks too hard because he's not a mortal man 저 락은 완전 최고였어 인간이 아니잖아 [JB] goddamn-it Kage, 왜그래 케이지! he gonna make you his sex slave, 저놈은 너를 성노예로 만들어 버릴거야. youre gonna gargle mayonnaise 그래도 좋아!? [KG] Noo. 아니 unless we bust a massive monster mamma-jam. 우린 그저 엄청 큰 괴물하고 싸우는거라고 [KG] dude, we've been through so much shit, 우리 많은 일을 겪었었지. [JB] deactivated lasers with my dick 내 거시기로 레이저도 이겼어 [BOTH] now its time to blow this fucker down! 이제 저 녀석을 눕혀버릴 차례야! [JB]C'mon Kage now it's time to blow doors down 가자 케이지 이제 문을 부숴버릴 차례야 [KG] I hear you Jables now it's time to blow doors down 듣고있어 제이블 이제 문 부술 차례야 [JB] Light up the stage cuz its time for a showdown 마지막 무대에 불을 켜! [KG] We'll bend you over then we'll take ya to brown town 저 재수없는 자식의 무릎을 꿇게 만들자 [BOTH] Now we've got to blow this fucker down 자 이제 저 녀석을 쓰러트리자! [KG] He's gonna rape me if we do not blow doors down 문을 부수지 못하면 나는 강간당하겠지 [JB] C'mon Kage cuz it's time to blow doors down 가자 케이지 이제 문을 부술 차례야! [KG] OOOOOOh (?) It's time for the black out 우린 할수 있어 심호흡을 하고!! [JB] Hey anti-christ-er, Beelzeboss, 이봐 적그리스도! 악마자식아! we know your weakness our rocket-sauce 우린 네 약점을 알아! 그리고 락의 원천도! we rock the casbah, and blow your mind 우리는 락의 성채로 네놈을 날릴거야 we will defeat you, for all mankind 모든 인류를 위해 너를 날려주마 you hold the scepter, 니가 주도권을 가지고 있지만 we hold the key 우린 열쇠를 가지고 있어 you are the devil, 너는 악마고 we are the D [17x] 우리는 D야! (17x) You guys are fuckin' lame. Come on Kage, 이게뭐야! 내가이겼어 이리와 케이지! You're comin with me. 나하고 같이가자! Taste my lightning Fuckers! 내 거시기좀 빨아봐!! [JB] NOOOO! 안돼!! [Beelz]ow! Fuck! 아! 젠장! My Fuckin' horn! 내 뿔! ooohh no! 아 안돼! [JB] From whence you came you shall remain, 니가 다시 완벽해 질때까지 until you are complete again 지옥에 남아 있어라!! Nooooooo! Fuck you Kage and Fuck you Jables! 안돼!! 죽어라 케이지 ! 그리고 엿먹어라 제이블! I'll get you Tenacious D! 언젠가 죽이겠다 터네이셔스 D!!
Cause it's the Pick of Destiny child, You know we will be rockin' cause it's fuckin' insane. It's just the Pick of Destiny child, More precious than a diamond on a platinum chain.
In Venice Beach there was a man named Kage. When he was buskin he was all the rage. He met Jables and he taught him well. All the techniques that were developed in hell. Cock-pushups and the power slide. Gig simulation now there's nowhere to hide. They formed a band, they named Tenacious D. and then they got the Pick Of Destiny.
Cause it's the Pick of Destiny child, You know we will be rockin' cause it's fuckin' insane. It's just the Pick of Destiny child, our tasty moves are better than a chicken chow mein.
Cause he who is sleazy, is easy to pleasy. and she who is juicy, must be loosy-goosey. and he who is groovy, will be in my movie, so come on!
The wizard and the demon had a battle royale, The demon almost killed him with an evil kapow. But then he broke his tooth, and thus the demon said Ow.
Cause it's the Pick of Destiny child, You know we will be rockin' cause it's fuckin' insane. It's just the Pick of Destiny child, You know our movie's better than a Citizen Kane
Cause he who's a geezer, must live in my freezer. and she who is snarky, is full of malarkey. and he who is groovy, must be in my movie, so come on!
Cause if you're a diva, then go to Geneva. and if you're a croney, then suck on my boney. and if you are groovy, then get in my movie, It's called the Pick of Destiny. It's called the Pick of Destiny!
You can't kill the metal The metal will live on Punk-Rock tried to kill the metal But they failed, as they were smite to the ground New-wave tried to kill the metal But they failed, as they were stricken down to the ground Grunge tried to kill the metal Ha,hahahahaha They failed, as they were thrown to the ground Aargh! yaow! [x2]
[Singing]
No-one can destroy the metal The metal will strike you down with a vicious blow We are the vanquished foes of the metal We tried to win for why we do not know
New-wave tried to destroy the metal, but the metal had its way Grunge then tried to dethrone the metal, but metal was in the way Punk-rock tried to destroy the metal, but metal was much too strong Techno tried to defile the metal, but techno was proven wrong Yea!
JB: BRRRRRRRRRRING....BRRRRRRRRRRRRING KG: *Click sound* Two Kings. JB: Hey Kage. KG: Hey. JB: How's it goin? KG: Good, good. JB: What're ya doin? KG: Oh God, I was just, I w- JB: I love you. KG: ...what'd you say? JB: Said I love you,man. Just wanted to say it. KG: Hey, thanks. Thank you. That's awesome, fuckin awesome...I mean, uh, that's cool you can, you can say that. JB: ...Don't you have something to say? KG: No...oh I mean, I uh, I like you.I like you too dude. JB: Whoa, like? OH HO HO MAN! I'm glad I fuckin did this test on you. The friendship test. KG: What? JB: No, man KG What are you talkin about? JB: What happened before, when I said I loved you,that was a test. Because man I coulda made a total ass of myself if I hadn't done this test on you. *whistle* hoo hoo! KG: But you don't? JB: Boy! KG: You don't, really love me? JB: Dude listen. You fuckin passed the test ok? But barely. Ya know what you got? KG: What? JB: F plus. Click
(spoken) Kyle Gass: Jack. Jack Black: Yeah? KG: Do you think some people... do you think that there's some people that aren't really... that are actually robots, living among us? JB: No. KG: ...that we can't tell... JB: No, we dont have the technology yet. But Rage. Rage. Rage... KG: Yeah? JB: You know what I was thinking? Stop playing. I was thinking of a fucking brilliant song. KG: Yeah? JB: Check it out, just do what I do. KG: Ok. JB: Just play this note. And then we both keep playing... just keep both playing that note. Every once in a while bend it. And that's it... and just remember who wrote that song. Me baby, me. KG: Oh.. JB: See, it's fucking simple. That's one song in the bank. Next song. KG: Is, uh? JB: Next song! KG: How can? But it's one note... JB: Next! KG: Anybody could have wrote it, anybody could have done that. Its one song, its one note. JB: But guess who did write it... ME! KG: Yeah but did you... did you write the, the listen... JB: Dude I did, I told you to do the bending every once in a while! KG: Oh yeah you did. JB: Woohoo, I win! KG: Shit. JB: I win. One to nothin'!
This is the greatest and best song in the world´s... Tribute. Long time ago me and my brother Kyle here, we was hitchhikin´ down a long and lonesome road. All of a sudden, there shined a shiny demon in the middle of the road. And he said!! "Play the best song in the world, or I´ll eat your soul." Well me and Kyle, we looked at each other, and we each said... "Okay." And we played the first thing that came to our heads, . Just so happened to be, The Best Song in the World, it was The Best Song in the World. Look into my eyes and it´s easy to see One and one make two, two and one make three, It was destiny. Once every hundred-thousand years or so, When the sun doth shine and the moon doth glow And the grass doth grow... Needless to say, the beast was stunned. Whip-crack went his schwumpy tail, And the beast was done. He asked us. "(snort) Be you angels?" And we said, "Nay. We are but men." Rock!! Ahhh, ahhh, ahhh-ah-ah, Ohhh, whoah, ah-whoah-oh! This is not The Greatest Song in the World, no. This is just a tribute. Couldn´t remember The Greatest Song in the World, no, no. This is a tribute, oh, to The Greatest Song in the World, All right!! It was The Greatest Song in the World, All right!! It was the best muthafuckin´ song the greatest song in the world. And the peculiar thing is this my friends the song we sang on that fateful night it didn´t actually sound anything like this song!! This is just a tribute. You gotta believe me!! And I wish you were there!! Just a matter of opinion. Ah, fuck!! Good God, God lovin´!! So surprised to find you can´t stop it. All right!! All right!!
High above the mucky-muck, castle made of clouds, There sits Wonderboy, sitting oh so proudly. Not much to say when you're high above the mucky-muck. Yeah, yeah. Wonderboy, what is the secret of your power? Wonderboy, won't you take me far away from the mucky-muck man? [spoken] Now it's time for me to tell you about Young Nastyman, archrival and nemesis of Wonderboy, with powers comparable to Wonderboy. What powers you ask? I dunno how 'bout the power of flight? That do anything for ya? That's levitation, holmes. How 'bout the power to kill a yak from 200 yards away... with mind bullets! That's telekinesis, Kyle. How 'bout the power to move you? [sung] History of Wonderboy and Young Nastyman, Riggah-goo-goo, riggah-goo-goo. A secret to be told, a gold chest to be bold, And blasting forth with three-part harmony, yeow! Wonderboy, what is the secret of your power? Wonderboy, won't you take me far away from the mucky-muck man? [spoken] Well, Wonderboy and Young Nastyman joined forces; they formed a band the likes of which have never been seen, and they called themselves Tenacious D. That's right, [sung] Me! And KG! [KG (spoken):] That's me. [sung] We're now Tenacious D! Come fly with me, fly! Wonderboy, what is the secret of your power? Wonderboy, won't you take me far away from the mucky-muck man, Oh! [spoken] Take my hand! Young Nastyman, and we'll fly! Bring out your broadsword. There's the hydra. Slice his throat! And grab his scroat. You take the high road, I'll take the low. There, the crevasse, Fill it with your mighty juice.
(spoken) (KG:) We should talk about the hard fucking though. (JB:) Hard fucking? (KG:) Because I think it's a pretty common complaint. (JB:) (laughing) The ladies don't really like the hard fucking. (KG:) You feel like your giving them some extra juice. (JB:) They're not into that. (KG:) No. You think your like, taking 'em to the limit. (JB:) Maybe they are though, in to that. You know what the test is? You just say, "Get on top honey, you do what you like." (KG:) (laughing) (JB:) And then sometimes she'll be fucking you really hard. It's like wait, "Well you like that? You like that? Slow down I'm gonna spurt! Agh! Um, sorry. You shouldn't have fucked me so hard." (laughing)
This is a song for the ladies but fellas... listen closely
You don't have to fuck her hard in fact sometimes that's not right to do.. Sometimes u got to make some love and fuckin give her some smooches too.. Sometimes you got to squeeze.. Sometiems you got to say "Please".. Sometimes you gotta say "Hey," "I'm gonna fuck you.. softly" "I'm gonna screw you gently" "I'm gonna hump you sweetly" "I'm gonna ball you discreetly" and then you say "Hey, I brought you flowers" and then you say "Wait a minute Sally," "I think I got sometin' in my teeth could you get it out for me?" That's fuckin' teamwork! What's your favorite posish? That's cool with me, It's not my favorite but I'll do it for you. What's your favorite dish? I'm not gonna cook it but I'll order it from ZANZIBAR! And then I'm gonna love you completely Then I'll fucking fuck you discreetly and then I'll fuckin bone you completely but then I'm gonna fuck... you hard..... Hard........
Climb upon my faithful steed, Then we gonna ride, gonna smoke some weed. Climb upon my big-ass steed, And ride, ride, ride.
Eeeee-eee-eee-eeeee-eeeee-eee-eee-eeeee-eeeee-eeeee-eeeee, What's the name of the song, Explosivo! Don't know what it's about, But it's good to go. What's the name of my girlfriend I don't know, But she's built like the shit And she's good to go, go, She's good to go, She's good to go.
We are fuelled by Satan, Yes we're schooled by Satan. Fuelled by Satan! Writin' those tasty riffs just as fast as we can. Schooled by Satan!
We were the inventors of the cosmic astral code. We've come to blow you away, We've come to blow your nose. We've come to fuckin' blow, We've come to blow the show. We've come to fuckin' blow, You know it, you know it!
Eeeee-eee-eee-eeeee-eeeee-eee-eee-eeeee-eeeee-eeeee-eeeee, What's the name of the song, Explosivo! Don't know what it's about But it's good to riddle-ah!
[spoken] I am not one of you. I come from an ancient time. I am known as The Kicker of Elves. I am also known as The Angel Crusher!
Dio has rocked for a long, long time, Now it's time for him to pass the torch. He has songs of wildebeests and angels, He has soared on the wings of a demon.
It's time to pass the torch, You're too old to rock, no more rockin' for you. We're takin' you to a home, But we will sing a song about you.
And we will make sure that you're very well taken care of. You'll tell us secrets that you've learned. Raow! Your sauce will mix with ours, And we'll make a good goulash baby. Dio, time to go! You must give your cape and scepter to me. And a smaller one for KG. Go! Go! Dio! Dio!
[Jack] Oh, my god. I've done it. Kage, come here I want you! (오, 세상에. 해냈어. Kage, 이리 와 봐!) [Kage]What?! What?! God! I was sleeping dude! What are you talkin about? (뭐? 뭐? 제발! 나 자고있었어 이놈아! 무슨말 하는거야?) [Jack] Oh, my god... (오, 신이시여...) [Kage] What? (뭐?) [Jack] I did it. (해냈어.) [Kage] What'd You Do? (뭘 해냈는데?) [Jack] I've done it.. I fuckin did it. (그걸 해냈다고... 염병할.) [Kage] What? (뭐?) [Jack] The most powerful tool in singing technology since yodeling, dude. Oh, my god, inward singing! (요들 이래로 가장 강력한 창법이지, 이놈아. 바로 들이쉬며 노래하기다!) [Kage] What? (뭐?) [Jack] Check it out. It's an invention and it makes non-stop rocking possible. (이것 봐, 이건 주구장창 노래부르는 걸 가능하게 만드는 혁명이야.) Think about it, man! Rock singers are only rockin you half the time, (생각해봐! 락 가수는 딱 반만큼만 노래부를수 있지,) the other time they're... they're... they're... they're... breathing in but not any more baby! HAHAHA... not with inward singing. Check it out... (나머진머진머진머진 숨쉬어야 되지만 이젠 아냐 Baby! 하하하... 들숨창법덕택에. 보라고..)
*Jack breathing*
[Singing] And then I start some lyrics and you (내가 가사를 부르고) [Inward Singing] Can't believe I'm singing (넌 내가 노래하는 걸 못믿지) [Singing] And I'm never fucking stopping and I'm (난 절대 멈추지 않아) [Inward Singing] Always fucking singing (몇날며칠 노래하지) [Singing] Now you know that I will never (넌 이제 내가 더이상) [Inward Singing] Stop the fucking singing (노래를 멈추지 않을 걸 알지) [Singing] I'm like a fucking one man band, I'm like a fucking one man (난 솔로 밴드가 좋아, 난 솔로 밴드가) [Inward Singing] Band! (좋아!)
[Jack]And I can sing like that all fuckin night... (난 이렇게 밤 새도록 노래부를 수 있어) [Kage] Wow... it wasn't really non-stop though. There was a slight... (와우... 비슷하긴 하지만 진정한 논스톱이 아니었...) [Jack]AHH shut up! It is non stop and theother thing is that when I'm fucking singing in it sounds even BETTER than when I'm singing out! (아~ 닥쳐! 이건 논스톱인데다가 노래까지 더 잘 부르게 해줘!) Shut up! Fuck you! You fuckin dick! Always ney saying everything I create! You piece of shit, you create something like inward singing! You fucking shit you fucking sit in your tower... (닥쳐! 엿 먹어! 씨X 새X! 내가 만든건 뭐든 토달지! 똥 조각, 이 씨X 똥 염병 네 탑에서 썩을...)
*Kage Laughing*
[Jack]...and fucking nap... what's funny? You fucking bitch! (병신같은 낮잠에...뭐가 웃겨? 이 개자식아!)
