Alanis Morissette

Do I stress you out?
My sweater is on backwards and inside out
And you say how appropriate
I don't want to dissect everything today
I don't mean to pick you apart you see
But I can't help it
There I go jumping before the gunshot has gone off
Slap me with a splintered ruler
And it would knock me to the floor if I wasn't there already
If only I could hunt the hunter

And all I really want is some patience
A way to calm the angry voice
And all I really want is deliverance

Do I wear you out
You must wonder why I'm relentless and all strung out
I'm consumed by the chill of solitary
I'm like Estella
I like to reel it in and then spit it out
I'm frustrated by your apathy
And I am frightened by the corrupted ways of this land
If only I could meet the Maker
And I am fascinated by the spiritual man
I am humbled by his humble nature

What I wouldn't give to find a soulmate
Someone else to catch this drift
And what I wouldn't give to meet a kindred

Enough about me, let's talk about you for a minute
Enough about you, let's talk about life for a while
The conflicts, the craziness and the sound of pretenses
Falling all around..... all around

Why are you so petrified of silence
Here can you handle this?
*SILENCE*
Did you think about your bills, you ex, your deadlines
Or when you think you're gonna die
Or did you long for the next distraction
And all I need now is intellectual intercourse
A soul to dig the hole much deeper
And I have no concept of time other than it is flying
If only I could kill the killer

And all I really want is some peace man
A place to find a common ground
And all I really want is a wavelength
And all I really want is some comfort
A way to get my hands untied
And all I really want is some justice....

I want you to know that I'm happy for you
I wish nothing but the best for you both
An older version of me
Is she perverted like me
Would she go down on you in a theatre
Does she speak eloquently
And would she have your baby
I'm sure she'd make a really excellent mother

'Cause the love that you gave that we made
wasn't able to make it enough for you to be open wide, no
And every time you speak her name
Does she know that you told me you'd hold me
Until you died, 'Till you died
But you're still alive

< Chorus >
And I'm here to remind you
Of the mess you left when you went away
It's not fair to deny me
Of the cross I bear that you gave to me
You, you, you oughta know

You seem very well, things look peaceful
I'm not quite as well, I thought you should know
Did you forget about me, Mr. Duplicity
I hate to bug you in the middle of dinner
It was a slap in the face how quickly I was replaced
Are you thinking of me when you fuck her

'Cause the love that you gave that we made
wasn't able to make it enough for you to be open wide, no
And every time you speak her name
Does she know how you told me you'd hold me
Until you died, 'Till you died
But you're still alive

Repeat Chorus

'Cause the joke that you laid on the bed that was me
And I'm not gonna fade
As soon as you close your eyes and you know it
And every time I sratch my nails down someone else's back
I hope you feel it ... well can you feel it

Repeat Chorus

Sometimes is never quite enough
If you're flawless, then you'll win my love
Don't forget to win first place
Don't forget to keep that smile on your face

Be a good boy
Try a little harder
You've got to measure up
And make me prouder

How long before you screw it up
How many times do I have to tell you to hurry up
With everything I do for you
The least you could do is keep quiet

Be a good girl
You've gotta try a little harder
That simply wasn't good enough
To make us proud

I'll live through you
I'll make you what I never was
If you're the best, then mabye so am I
Compared to him compared to her
I'm doing this for your own damn good
You'll make up for what I blew
What's the problem.... why are you crying

Be a good boy
Push a little farther now
That wasn't fast enough
To make us happy
We'll love you just the way you are if you're perfect

I'm broke but I'm happy
I'm poor but I'm kind
I'm short but I'm healthy, yeah
I'm high but I'm grounded
I'm sane but I'm overwhelmed
I'm lost but I'm hopeful, baby

What it all comes down to
Is that everything's gonna be fine fine fine
I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is giving a high five

I feel drunk but I'm sober
I'm young and I'm underpaid
I'm tired but I'm working, yeah
I care but I'm restless
I'm here but I'm really gone
I'm wrong and I'm sorry baby

What it all comes down to
Is that everything's gonna be quite alright
I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is flicking a cigarette

What it all comes down to
Is that I haven't got it all figured out just yet
I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is giving the peace sign

I'm free but I'm focused
I'm green but I'm wise
I'm hard but I'm friendly baby
I'm sad but I'm laughing
I'm brave but I'm chicken shit
I'm sick but and pretty baby

What it all boils down to
Is that no one's really got it all figured out just yet
I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is playing the piano

What it all comes down to my friends
Is that everything's just fine fine fine
I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is hailing a taxi cab...

Wait a minute man
You mispronounced my name
You didn't wait for all the information
Before you turned me away
Wait a minute sir
You kind of hurt my feelings
You took me for a sweet backloaded puppet
and you've got meal ticket taste

< Chorus >
I see right through you
I know right through you
I feel right through you
I walk right through you

You took me for a joke
You took me for a child
You took a long hard look at my ass
And then played golf for a while
Your shake is like a fish
You pat me on the head
You took me out to wine dine 69 me
But didn't hear a damn word I said

Repeat Chorus

Hello Mr. Man
You didn't think I'd come back
You didn't think I'd show up with my army
And this ammunition on my back
Now that I'm Miss Thing
Now that I'm a zillionaire
You scan the credits for your name
And wonder why it's not there

Repeat Chorus

You know how us Catholic girls can be
We make up for so much time a little too late
I never forgot it, confusing as it was
No fun with no guilt feelings
The sinners, the saviours, the loverless priests
I'll see you next Sunday

< Chorus >
We all had our reasons to be there
We all had a thing or two to learn
We all needed something to cling to
So we did

I sang Alleluia in the choir
I confessed my darkest deeds to an envious man
My brothers they never went blind for what they did
But I may as well have
In the name of the Father, the Skeptic and the Son
I had one more stupid question

Repeat Chorus

What I learned I rejected but I believe again
I will suffer the consequence of this inquisition
And if I jump in this fountain, will I be forgiven

Repeat Chorus

We all had delusions in our head
We all had our minds made up for us
We had to believe in something
So we did

I recomend getting your heart trampled on to anyone
I recommend walking around naked in your living room
Swallow it down (what a jagged little pill)
It feels so good (swimming in your stomach)
Wait until the dust settles

< Chorus >
You live you learn
You love you learn
You cry you learn
You lose you learn
You bleed you learn
You scream you learn

I recommend biting off more than you can chew to anyone
I certainly do
I recommend sticking your foot in your mouth at any time
Feel free
Throw it down (the caution blocks you from the wind)
Hold it up (to the rays)
You wait and see when the smoke clears

Repeat Chorus

Wear it out (the way a three-year-old would do)
Melt it down (you're gonna have to eventually anyway)
The firetrucks are coming up around the bend

Repeat Chorus

You grieve you learn
You choke you learn
You laugh you learn
You choose you learn
You pray you learn
You ask you learn
You live you learn

I had no choice but to hear you
You stated your case time and again
I thought about it

You treat me like I'm a princess
I'm not used to liking that
You ask how my day was

** Chorus
You've already won me over in spite of me
Don't be alarmed if I fall head over feet
Don't be suprised if I love you for all that you are
I couldn't help it
It's all your fault

Your love is thick and it swallowed me whole
You're so much braver than I gave you credit for
That's not lip service

Repeat Chorus

You are the bearer of unconditional things
You held your breath and the door for me
Thanks for your patience

You're the best listener that I've ever met
You're my best friend
Best friend with benefits
What took me so long

I've never felt this healthy before
I've never wanted something rational
I am aware now
I am aware now

Repeat Chorus

What's the matter Mary Jane, you had a hard day
As you place the don't disturb sign on the door
You lost your place in line again, what a pity
You never seem to want to dance anymore
It's a long way down
On this roller coaster
The last chance streetcar
Went off the track
And you're on it.
I hear you're counting sheep again Mary Jane
What's the point of trying to dream anymore
I hear you're losing weight again Mary Jane
Do you ever wonder who you're losing it for
Well it's full speed baby
In the wrong direction
There's a few more bruises
If that's the way
You insist on heading
Please be honest Mary Jane
Are you happy
Please don't censor your tears
You're the sweet crusader
And you're on your way
You're the last great innocent
And that's why I love you
So take this moment Mary Jane and be selfish
Worry not about the cars that go by
All that matters Mary Jane is your freedom
Keep warm my dear, keep dry
Tell me
Tell me
What's the matter Mary Jane

An old man turned ninety-eight
He won the lottery and died the next day
It's a black fly in your chardonnay
It's a death row pardon two minutes too late
And isn't it ironic, don't you think

**Chorus
It's like rain on your wedding day
It's a free ride when you've already paid
It's the good advice that you just didn't take
And who would've thought it figures

Mr. Play It Safe was afraid to fly
He packed his suitcase and kissed his kids good-bye
He waited his whole damn life to take that flight
And as the plane crashed down he thought
"Well isn't this nice"
And isn't it ironic, don't you think

Repeat Chorus

Well life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
When you think everything's okay and
Everything's going right
And life has a funny way of helping you out when
You think everything's gone wrong and
Everything blows up in your face

A traffic jam when you're already late
A no-smoking sign on your cigarette break
It's like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife
It's meeting the man of my dreams
And then meeting his beautiful wife
And isn't it ironic, don't you think
A little too ironic, and yeah I really do think

Repeat Chorus

Well Life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
And Life has a funny, funny way of helping you out
Helping you out

I don't want to be the filler if the void is solely yours
I don't want to be your glass of single malt whiskey
Hidden in the bottom drawer
I don't want to be a bandage if the wound is not mine
Lend me some fresh air
I don't want to be adored for
what I merely represent to you
I don't want to be your babysitter
You're a very big boy now
I don't want to be your mother
I did't carry you in my womb for nine months
Show me the back door

**Chorus
Visiting hours are 9 to 5 and if I show up at 10 past 6
Well I already know that you'd find some way
to sneak me in and oh
Mind the empty bottle with the holes along the bottom
You see it's too much to ask for and I am not the doctor

I don't want to be the sweeper of the eggshells that you walk upon
I don't want to be your other half I believe that 1 and 1 make 2
I dont want to be your food or the light from the fridge
on your face at midnight
Hey what are you hungry for
I don't want to be the glue that holds your pieces together
I don't want to be your idol
See this pedestal is high and I'm afraid of heights
I don't want to be lived through
A vicarious occassion
Please open the window

Repeat Chorus

I don't want to live on someday when my motto is last week
I don't want to be responsible for your fractured heart
and its wounded beat
I don't want to be a substitute for the smoke you've been inhaling
What do you thank me
What do you thank me for

Repeat Chorus

You like snow but only if it's warm
You like rain but only if it's dry
No sentimental value to the rose that fell upon your floor
No fundamental excuse for the granted I'm taken for

'Cause it's easy not to
So much easier not to
And what goes around never comes around to you

You like pain but only if it doesn't hurt too much
You sit...and you wait...to receive
There's an obvious attraction
To the path of least resistance in your life
There's an obvious aversion no amount of my insistence
could make you try tonight

'Cause it's easy not to
So much easier not to
And what goes around never comes around to you
To you to you to you to you to you...
There's no love no money no thrill anymore

There's an apprehensive naked little trembling boy
With his head in his hands
There's an underestimated and impatient little girl
Raising her hand

But it's easy not to
So much easier not to
And what goes around never comes around to you
To you, to you

get up get up get up off of it
get up get up get up off of it
get out get outta here enough already
get up get up get up off of it
wake up

I recommend getting your heart trampled on to anyone
I recommend walking around naked in your living room
Swallow it down (what a jagged little pill)
It feels so good (swimming in your stomach)
wait until the dust settles

*You live you learn
You love you learn
You cry you learn
You lose you learn
You bleed you learn
You scream you learn

I recommend biting off more than
you can chew to anyone
I certainly do
I recommend sticking your foot in your mouth
at any time Feel free
Throw it down (the caution blocks you from the wind)
Hold it up (to the rays)
You wait and see when the smoke clears

* Repeat

Wear it out (the way a three-year-old would do)
Melt it down (you're gonna have to eventually anyway)
The fire trucks are coming up around the bend

* Repeat

You grieve you learn
You choke you learn
You laugh you learn
You choose you learn
You pray you learn
You ask you learn
You live you learn

dear dar(lin') your mom (my friend)
left a message on my machine she was frantic
saying you were talking crazy that
you wanted to do away with yourself
I guess she thought i'd be a perfect resort
because we've had this inexplicable connection
since our youth and yes they're in shock
they are panicked you and
your chronic them and their drama
you this embarrassment us
in the middle of this delusion
if we were our bodies
if we were our futures
if we were our defenses i'd be joining you
if we were our culture
if we were our leaders
if we were our denials i'd be joining you
I remember vividly a day years ago
we were camping you knew more than
you thought you should know
you said "I don't want ever to be brainwashed"
and you were mindboggling you were intense
you were uncomfortable in your own skin
you were thirsty but mostly you were beautiful
if we were our nametags
if we were our rejections
if we were our outcomes i'd be joining you
if we were our indignities
if we were our successes
if we were our emotions i'd be joining you
you and I we're like 4 year olds
we want to know why and how come about everything
we want to reveal ourselves
at will and speak our minds and
never talk small and be intuitive
and question mightily and find god my tortured beacon
we need to find like-minded companions
if we were their condemnations
if we were their projections
if we were our paranoias i'd be joining you
if we were our incomes
if we were our obsession
if we were our afflictions i'd be joining you
we need reflection we need a really
good memory feel free to call me a little more often

And you're like a 90's Jesus
And you revel in your psychosis
How dare you?
And you sample concepts like hors d'oheurves
And you eat their questions for dessert
Is it just me or is it hot in here?


And you're like a 90's Kennedy
And you're really a million years old
You can't fool me
They'll throw opinions like rocks in riots
And they'll stumble around like hypocrites
Is it just me or is it dark in here?


You may never be or have a husband
You may never have or hold a child
You will learn to lose everything
We are temporary arrangements


And you're like a 90's Noah
And they laughed at
you as you packed up all your things
And they wonder why you're frustrated
And they wonder why you're so angry
Is it just me or are you fed up


And God bless you in your travels and
your conquests and queries

that I would be good even if I did nothing
that I would be good even if I got the thumbs down
that I would be good if I got and stayed sick
that I would be good even if I gained ten pounds

that I would be fine even if I went bankrupt
that I would be good if I lost my hair and my youth
that I would be great if I was no longer queen
that I would be grand if I was not all knowing

that I would be loved even when I numb myself
that I would be good even when I am overwhelmed
that I would be loved even when I was fuming
that I would be good even if I was clingy

that I would be good even if I lost sanity
that I would be good
whether with or without you

I had no choice but to hear you
You stated your case time and again
I thought about it

You treat me like I'm a princess
I'm not used to liking that
You ask how my day was

*You've already won me over in spite of me
Don't be alarmed if I fall head over feet
Don't be surprised if I love you for all that you are
I couldn't help it
It's all your fault


Your love is thick and it swallowed me whole
You're so much braver than I gave you credit for
That's not lip service

* Repeat

You are the bearer of unconditional things
You held your breath and the door for me
Thanks for your patience


You're the best listener that I've ever met
You're my best friend
Best friend with benefits
What took me so long


I've never felt this healthy before
I've never wanted something rational
I am aware now
I am aware now

* Repeat

please be philosophical
Please be tapped into your femininity
Please be able to take the wheel from me
Please be crazy and curious


Papa love your princess so that
she will find loving princes familiar
Papa cry for your princess so that
she will find gentle princes familiar


Please be a sexaholic
Please be unpredictably miserable
Please be self absorbed much, not the good kind
Please be addicted to some substance


Papa listen to your princess so that
she will find attentive princes familiar
Papa hear your princess so that
she will find curious princes familiar


Please be the jerk of my knee
I've fit you always
You finish my sentences I think I love you
What is your name again no matter
I'm guessing your thoughts again correctly
And I love the way you press my buttons
so much sometimes I could strangle you


Papa laugh with your princess so that
she will find funny princes familiar
Papa respect your princess so that
she will find respectful princes familiar


Please be strangely enigmatic
Please be just like my.....

as we were talking outside it was cold
we were shivering yet warmed by the subject matter
my wife is in the next room
we've been having troubles
you know please don't tell her or anyone
but I need to talk to somebody
you said "wouldn't it be a shame
if I knew how great I was five minutes before
I died i'd be filled
with such regret before I took my last breath"
and I said "you're willing to tell me this now
and you're not going to die any time soon"
and I said I haven't been eating chicken
or meat or anything and you said yes
but you've been wearing leather and laughed
and said we're at the top of the food chain
and yes you're still a fine woman and I cringed
I was hoping I was hoping we could heal each other
I was hoping I was hoping we could be raw together
we left the restaurant where the head waiter
(in his 60's) said "good-bye sir thank you
for your business sir you're
successful and established sir and
we like the frequency with which you dine here sir
and your money" and when I walked by
they said "thank you too dear"
I was all pigtails and cords
and there was a day when
I would've said something like "hey dude
I could buy and sell this place so kiss it"
I too once thought I was owed something
I was hoping I was hoping we could challenge each other
I was hoping I was hoping we could crack each other up
I too thought that when proved wrong I lost somehow
I too once thought life was cruel
it's a cycle really you think
i'm withdrawing and guilt tripping you
I think you're insensitive
and I don't feel heard and
I said do you believe
we are fundamentally judgmental?
fundamentally evil? and you said yes
I said I don't believe in revenge in right
or wrong good or bad you said
"well what about the man that
I saw handcuffed in the emergency room
bleeding after beating his kid
and she threw a shoe at his head.
I think what he did was wrong and
I would've had a hard time feeling compassion for him"
I had to watch my tone for fear of having you feel judged.
I was hoping I was hoping we could dance together
I was hoping I was hoping we could be creamy together

An old man turned ninety-eight
He won the lottery and died the next day
It's a black fly in your Chardonnay
It's a death row pardon two minutes too late
Isn't it ironic... don't you think


It's like rain on your wedding day
It's a free ride when you've already paid
It's the good advice that you just didn't take
Who would've thought... it figures


Mr. Play It Safe was afraid to fly
He packed his suitcase and kissed his kids good-bye
He waited his whole damn life to take that flight
And as the plane crashed down he thought
"Well, isn't this nice."
And isn't it ironic ... don't you think?


It's like rain on your wedding day
It's a free ride when you've already paid
It's the good advice that you just didn't take
Who would've thought... it figures


Well life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
When you think everything's okay and everything's going right
And life has a funny way of helping you out when
You think everything's gone wrong and everthing blows up
In your face


A traffic jam when you're already late
A no-smoking sign on your cigarette break
It's like 10,000 spoons when all you need is a knife
It's meeting the man of my dreams
And then meeting his beautiful wife
And isn't it ironic... don't you think
A little too ironic.. and yeah I really do think...


It's like rain on your wedding day
It's a free ride when you've already paid
It's the good advice that you just didn't take
Who would've thought... it figures

Well life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
And life has a funny way of helping you out
Helping you out