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2:41 | 
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from The Lonely Island - Dick In A Box [single] (2006)
Hey girl I got somethin` real important to give you
So just sit down and listen Girl you know we`ve been together such a long long time (such a long time) And now I`m ready to lay it on the line (Wooow) You know it`s Christmas and my heart is open wide Gonna give you something so you know what`s on my mind A gift real special, so take off the top Take a look inside it`s my dick in a box Not gonna get you a diamond ring That sort of gift don`t mean anything Not gonna get you a fancy car Girl ya gotta know you`re my shining star Not gonna get you a house in the hills A girl like you needs somethin` real Wanna get you somethin` from the heart Somethin` special girl It`s my dick in a box, my dick in a box babe It`s my dick in a box, my dick in a box girl See I`m wise enough to know when a gift needs givin` (yeah) And I got just the one, somethin` to show ya that you are second to none To all the fellas out there with ladies to impress It`s easy to do just follow these steps 1: Cut a hole in a box 2: Put your junk in that box 3: Make her open the box And that`s the way you do it It`s my dick in a box... my dick in a box babe It`s my dick in a box, my dick in a box girl Christmas; dick in a box Hanukkah; dick in a box Kwanzaa; a dick in a box Every single holiday a dick in a box Over at your parent`s house a dick in a box Mid day at the grocery store a dick in a box Backstage at the CMA`s a dick in a box (yeah-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow) a dick in a box.. |
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2:32 |
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from The Lonely Island - Jizz In My Pants [Explicit] [single] (2008)
Lock eyes from across the room
건너편에서 마주친 눈 down my drink while the rhythms boom 음악이 흐르며 들어가는 음료 take your hand and skip the names 손을 잡고 이름은 생략하고 no need here for the silly games 장난 같은 것들은 필요하지 않아 make our way through the smoke and crowd 사람과 안개를 지나가며 the club is the sky and I’m on your cloud 클럽은 하늘이고 나는 네 구름에 있고 move in close as the lasers fly 레이져가 쏘아 다니는 새에 가까워지고 our bodies touch and the angels cry 우리 몸이 부딪히며 천사들이 우네 leave this place go back to yours 여기를 떠나 네 곳으로 가 our lips first touch outside your doors 네 문 밖에서 입술끼리 맞 닿고 a whole night what we’ve got in store 우리 앞엔 밤이 있지 whisper in my ear that you want some more 내 귀에 더 달라고 속삭이는 너 and I 그리고 난 JIZZ IN MY PANTS 바지에 싸버렸어 This really never happens you can take my word 이런 일은 절대로 일어나지 않아 날 믿어 I won’t apologize, that’s just absurd 사과하면 더 어이 없겠지 Mainly your fault from the way that you dance 사실 그렇게 춤추는 네 탓이야 and now I 그리고 난 JIZZ IN MY PANTS 바지에 싸버렸어 don’t tell your friends or I’ll say your a slut 친구들한테 말하면 창녀라고 말한다 plus its your fault, you were rubbing my butt 그리고 네 탓이야 내 엉덩이를 만졌는걸 I’m very sensitive, some would say that’s a plus 난 엄청 민감해 그게 낫단 사람도 있지 Now I’ll go home and change 인제 갈아 입으러 갈게 I need a few things from the grocery 장보러 갈게 좀 생겼어 do things alone now mostly 요샌 혼자서 뭐든지 다하고 있지 left me heart broken not lookin’ for love 부서진 내 가슴 사랑을 찾지 않고 surprised in my eyes when I looked above 올려다보니 놀라고 말았어 the check out counter and I saw her face 계산대에서 누군갈 봤어 My heart stood still so did time and space 심장이 굳고 우주와 시간도 굳었어 Never felt that I could feel real again 다시 진실함을 느낄줄은 몰랐어 But the look in her eyes said I need a friend 그치만 그녀의 눈은 친구가 필요하다고 말했어 She turned to me that’s when she said it 나한테 돌아보며 그녀는 말했어 Looked me dead in the face, asked “Cash or Credit?” 조용히 바라보며 '카드 아니면 현금?'이라고 묻는 너 And I 그리고 난 JIZZED IN MY PANTS 바지에 싸버렸어 It’s perfectly normal, nothing wrong with me 상당히 정상적인 일이지 나한테 문제는 없어 But we’re going to need a clean up on aisle 3 그치만 3번 계산대를 치워야겠는걸 And now I’m posed in an awkward stance 어색한 포즈로 서있는 나 because I 왜냐면 JIZZED IN MY PANTS 바지에 싸버렸어 To be fair you were flirting a lot 사실은 네가 희롱을 한거잖아 plus the way you bag cans got me bothered and hot 더구나 캔을 넣는 모습이 날 흥분시켰어 please stop acting like you’re not impressed 관심 없단 표정 같은거 짓지마 One more thing, I’m gonna pay by check 하나만 더, 수표로 낼게 Last week - I saw a film 지난 주- 영화를 봤어 As I recall it was a horror film 생각해보니 호러 영화였어 Walked outside into the rain 비가 오는 밖으로 걸어갔어 Checked my phone and saw you rang and I 전화기를 보니 네가 전화를 걸었어그리고 난 JIZZED IN MY PANTS 바지에 싸버렸어 Speeding down the street when the red lights flash 빨간불이 깜빡일 때 도로를 가로질러 need to get away need to make a dash 도망쳐야해 빨리 나와야해 A song comes on that reminds me of you and I 네 생각이 나는 음악이 흘러나와 그리고 난 JIZZ IN MY PANTS 바지에 싸버렸어 The next day my alarm goes off and I 다음 날 알람이 울려 그리고 난 JIZZ IN MY PANTS 바지에 싸버렸어 Open my window and a breeze rolls in and I 창문을 여니 바람이 들어와 그리고 난 JIZZ IN MY PANTS 바지에 싸버렸어 When Bruce Willis was dead at the end of sixth sense I 브루스 윌리스가 식스 센스 마지막 부분에서 죽었을 때 난 JIZZED IN MY PANTS 바지에 싸버렸어 I just ate a grape and I 방금 포도를 먹었어 그리고 난 JIZZED…IN…MY PANTS 바지에 싸버렸어 JIZZED…IN…MY PANTS 바지에 싸버렸어 Ok seriously you guys can we…ok… 얌마들아... 좀 진지해져봐라... 응.. I JIZZ RIGHT IN MY PANTS EVERY TIME YOU’RE NEXT TO ME 네가 내 옆에 있으면 난 언제나 싸버려 AND WHEN WE’RE HOLDING HANDS ITS LIKE HAVING SEX TO ME 손을 잡고 있을땐 섹스 하는 것 같아 YOU SAY IM PREMATURE I JUST CALL IT ECSTASY 넌 내가 조루하다하지만 난 그냥 환희이라고 해 I WEAR A RUBBER AT ALL TIMES ITS A NECESSITY 꼭 필요하니까 언제나 고무[콘돔]를 끼고 있어 'Cause I 왜냐면 나 JIZZ…IN…MY PANTS 바지에 싸버려 yes I 그래 나 JIZZ…IN…MY PANTS 바지에 싸버려 |
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1:17 |
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from The Lonely Island 1집 - Incredibad (2009)
(Spoken) Hey yo, check this out. I was just at the club right, heard these two dudes talking, one of them said to the other one, that they knew someone, who said you guys are wack!
(Who said we're wack?) You said we're wack? You take it back! (Who said we're wack?) You talkin' smack? You gonna get smacked. (You're sayin' that we're wack but it just ain't so.) Someone said we're wack! Why would they say that? I don't think we're wack. Who said we're wack? Who said we're wack? I can't believe that. They must be smoking crack, To say that we're wack. Say that we're wack? You'll probably get smacked. If you say we're wack. Did you say we're wack? (Who said we're wack?) I'll paint your eye black, Once I check my facts. (Who said we're wack?) How could a person up and call a person wack? How could the devil turn the blue sky black? How many babies born will ever reach their dreams? And how could a person call another person wack? Heard a rumor, that someone said we're wack. I think that it's wack, to call someone wack. I am not wack, no matter what you say, What did you say? Did you say I'm wack? All the ladies in the house put your hands up! All the fellas in the house put your hands up! Now whoever said we're wack put your hand up! Now everyone else put your hands down! (Spoken) Oh, there he is, there he is. |
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2:35 |
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from The Lonely Island 1집 - Incredibad (2009)
What is that, Cristal? (No!) Dom P? (Hell no!) (This is that Carlos Santana champagne!) Oh shit, Santana DVX? That's my joint! (Mine too, but a lot of these busters don't know about it) WELL LET'S TELL THESE MOTHERFUCKERS~! As a kid, I used to lay awake and think When was Santana gonna make a drink? But now I'm all grown and my dream came true Santana champagne, from here to you From the heart of Napa Valley and the guitar king Comes a sparkling wine, to make a blind man sing Yo it's the cham-pan-yah, from the man with the bandana I can't stand a flute with anything but Santana What's the first name in cham - it's Carlos And to that man I propose a toast In the 60's, he had lots of freebie sex But now he's gettin down with the DVX Excuse me fellas! Am I to understand that Carlos Santana has made a champagne? (That's right motherfucker! Here, try it) Alright [pops bottle] AWWWWWWWWW SHIT~! I feel alive for the first time Each sip hits my lips like a landmine Without Carlos in my life I was livin a lie He makes his guitar weep, but his champagne cries He's a Southwest, tie wearin bolo champ Comin straight out the box with a bolo champ' Yo he a beast with the sugar and yeast, mix it in pots Like the way his release mixed jazz blues and pops And the salsa fusion, he's lady's shoe producin Plus he teamed with Rob Thomas for a music revolution On the 7th day, it was said God rest But on the 8th day he made the DVX Gentlemen, gentlemen, what is all the hubbub about? (Carlos Santana!) That's right I see bitches-is enjoyin my sparkling wine (We certainly are) Well be careful cause this shit'll get you fucked up Bitch! I'm like no other, one of a kind, my sparkling wine Santana DVX make you wanna have sex (OOOOH) I'm rich bitch! I'm havin my chips Get laid all the time, by 70's chicks - uhh Won hella Grammies, batches throw me they panties I'm probably your daddy, I probably nutted in your mammy I'm a Bay boy, city life, been around the corner Try to play me foul and my vatos gon' run up on ya A legend, a boss, that's what I are Ask about me pimp, 'tana be killin the guitar Old enough to know better but young enough to not care I get active - might slap a bitch with my hair (WHIP) Left coast up top I bang that shit My sparkling wine'll pop Cristal on her lip Cain't stop, won't stop gettin my bread Pack arenas and coliseums now watch me shred Ohhhh, San-tan-tan-tan-ahhhh A monkey drank a bottle and learned to speak A queer drank a bottle and became a freak A lion drank a bottle and forgot how to growl A horse drank a bottle, and fucked a cow~! |
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2:31 |
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from The Lonely Island 1집 - Incredibad (2009)
Lock eyes from across the room
건너편에서 마주친 눈 down my drink while the rhythms boom 음악이 흐르며 들어가는 음료 take your hand and skip the names 손을 잡고 이름은 생략하고 no need here for the silly games 장난 같은 것들은 필요하지 않아 make our way through the smoke and crowd 사람과 안개를 지나가며 the club is the sky and I’m on your cloud 클럽은 하늘이고 나는 네 구름에 있고 move in close as the lasers fly 레이져가 쏘아 다니는 새에 가까워지고 our bodies touch and the angels cry 우리 몸이 부딪히며 천사들이 우네 leave this place go back to yours 여기를 떠나 네 곳으로 가 our lips first touch outside your doors 네 문 밖에서 입술끼리 맞 닿고 a whole night what we’ve got in store 우리 앞엔 밤이 있지 whisper in my ear that you want some more 내 귀에 더 달라고 속삭이는 너 and I 그리고 난 JIZZ IN MY PANTS 바지에 싸버렸어 This really never happens you can take my word 이런 일은 절대로 일어나지 않아 날 믿어 I won’t apologize, that’s just absurd 사과하면 더 어이 없겠지 Mainly your fault from the way that you dance 사실 그렇게 춤추는 네 탓이야 and now I 그리고 난 JIZZ IN MY PANTS 바지에 싸버렸어 don’t tell your friends or I’ll say your a slut 친구들한테 말하면 창녀라고 말한다 plus its your fault, you were rubbing my butt 그리고 네 탓이야 내 엉덩이를 만졌는걸 I’m very sensitive, some would say that’s a plus 난 엄청 민감해 그게 낫단 사람도 있지 Now I’ll go home and change 인제 갈아 입으러 갈게 I need a few things from the grocery 장보러 갈게 좀 생겼어 do things alone now mostly 요샌 혼자서 뭐든지 다하고 있지 left me heart broken not lookin’ for love 부서진 내 가슴 사랑을 찾지 않고 surprised in my eyes when I looked above 올려다보니 놀라고 말았어 the check out counter and I saw her face 계산대에서 누군갈 봤어 My heart stood still so did time and space 심장이 굳고 우주와 시간도 굳었어 Never felt that I could feel real again 다시 진실함을 느낄줄은 몰랐어 But the look in her eyes said I need a friend 그치만 그녀의 눈은 친구가 필요하다고 말했어 She turned to me that’s when she said it 나한테 돌아보며 그녀는 말했어 Looked me dead in the face, asked “Cash or Credit?” 조용히 바라보며 '카드 아니면 현금?'이라고 묻는 너 And I 그리고 난 JIZZED IN MY PANTS 바지에 싸버렸어 It’s perfectly normal, nothing wrong with me 상당히 정상적인 일이지 나한테 문제는 없어 But we’re going to need a clean up on aisle 3 그치만 3번 계산대를 치워야겠는걸 And now I’m posed in an awkward stance 어색한 포즈로 서있는 나 because I 왜냐면 JIZZED IN MY PANTS 바지에 싸버렸어 To be fair you were flirting a lot 사실은 네가 희롱을 한거잖아 plus the way you bag cans got me bothered and hot 더구나 캔을 넣는 모습이 날 흥분시켰어 please stop acting like you’re not impressed 관심 없단 표정 같은거 짓지마 One more thing, I’m gonna pay by check 하나만 더, 수표로 낼게 Last week - I saw a film 지난 주- 영화를 봤어 As I recall it was a horror film 생각해보니 호러 영화였어 Walked outside into the rain 비가 오는 밖으로 걸어갔어 Checked my phone and saw you rang and I 전화기를 보니 네가 전화를 걸었어그리고 난 JIZZED IN MY PANTS 바지에 싸버렸어 Speeding down the street when the red lights flash 빨간불이 깜빡일 때 도로를 가로질러 need to get away need to make a dash 도망쳐야해 빨리 나와야해 A song comes on that reminds me of you and I 네 생각이 나는 음악이 흘러나와 그리고 난 JIZZ IN MY PANTS 바지에 싸버렸어 The next day my alarm goes off and I 다음 날 알람이 울려 그리고 난 JIZZ IN MY PANTS 바지에 싸버렸어 Open my window and a breeze rolls in and I 창문을 여니 바람이 들어와 그리고 난 JIZZ IN MY PANTS 바지에 싸버렸어 When Bruce Willis was dead at the end of sixth sense I 브루스 윌리스가 식스 센스 마지막 부분에서 죽었을 때 난 JIZZED IN MY PANTS 바지에 싸버렸어 I just ate a grape and I 방금 포도를 먹었어 그리고 난 JIZZED…IN…MY PANTS 바지에 싸버렸어 JIZZED…IN…MY PANTS 바지에 싸버렸어 Ok seriously you guys can we…ok… 얌마들아... 좀 진지해져봐라... 응.. I JIZZ RIGHT IN MY PANTS EVERY TIME YOU’RE NEXT TO ME 네가 내 옆에 있으면 난 언제나 싸버려 AND WHEN WE’RE HOLDING HANDS ITS LIKE HAVING SEX TO ME 손을 잡고 있을땐 섹스 하는 것 같아 YOU SAY IM PREMATURE I JUST CALL IT ECSTASY 넌 내가 조루하다하지만 난 그냥 환희이라고 해 I WEAR A RUBBER AT ALL TIMES ITS A NECESSITY 꼭 필요하니까 언제나 고무[콘돔]를 끼고 있어 'Cause I 왜냐면 나 JIZZ…IN…MY PANTS 바지에 싸버려 yes I 그래 나 JIZZ…IN…MY PANTS 바지에 싸버려 |
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2:36 |
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from The Lonely Island 1집 - Incredibad (2009)
Shorty
Aww shit get your towels ready it's about to go down Everybody in the place hit the fucking deck But stay on your motherfucking toes We running this let's go I'm on a boat I'm on a boat Everybody look at me cause I'm sailing on a boat I'm on a boat I'm on a boat Take a good hard look at the motherfucking boat I'm on a boat motherfucker take a look at me Straight floating on a boat on the deep blue sea Busting five knots wind whipping out my coat You can't stop me motherfucker cause I'm on a boat Take a picture trick I'm on a boat bitch We drinking Santana champ Cause it's so crisp I got my swim trunks And my flippie floppies I'm flipping burgers you at Kinko's Straight flipping copies I'm riding on a dolphin doing flips and shit The dolphin's splashing getting everybody all wet But this ain't Seaworld this is real as it gets I'm on a boat motherfucker don't you ever forget I'm on a boat and It's going fast and I got a nautical themed pashmina afghan I'm the king of the world On a boat like Leo If you're on the shore then you're sure not me oh Get the fuck up this boat is REAL Fuck land I'm on a boat motherfucker Fuck trees I climb buoys motherfucker I'm on the deck with my boys motherfucker This boat engine make noise motherfucker Hey ma if you could see me now Arms spread wide on the starboard bow Gonna fly this boat to the moon somehow Like Kevin Garnett anything is possible Yeah never thought I'd be on a boat It's a big blue watery road Poseidon Look at me oh Never thought I'd see the day When a big boat coming my way Believe me when I say I fucked a mermaid I'm on a boat I'm on a boat Everybody look at me cause I'm sailing on a boat I'm on a boat I'm on a boat Take a good hard look at the mothafuckin' boat |
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2:07 |
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from The Lonely Island 1집 - Incredibad (2009)
Well, he was the Sax Man from the state of Tennessee First set in with the band at the ripe old age of three, weeks old And when he blew into that horn all the people gathered 'round Club manager jumped right up and said, "Boy, I gotta have that sound!" Scream "Hallelujah Lord!", I said the Sax Man's got my soul Everybody gotta move their feet when the Sax Man started to blow Now blow it Sax Man! * (weak saxophone noises) Nnnn, 'kay, he's a little shy, but his genius cannot hide Cause when the Sax Man starts to win he gonna take you on a ride Take it Sax Man! * Ow! Take it Sax Man! He'll be right with you folks! * All right, Sax Man, that's my fault, I put you on the spot But now you're all warmed up and this-a next one's gonna be hot Kick it Sax Man! (Come on!) * (What the fuck are you doing?!) * Haha, okay! Why don't we have a little inspiration now. You know this game, Sax Man! Repeat after me, here we go, and! Shibidi bop bop buda bop bop * Bip bip bipbip bip bip bipbip bip * Aridididi bop bududidadi Fuckin' play something, Sax Man! * Okay, move it on! Sax Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan, Sax Man! |
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2:20 |
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from The Lonely Island 1집 - Incredibad (2009)
Andy: Lazy Sunday, wake up in the late afternoon, call Parnell just to see how he's doin.
Chris: Hello? Andy: What up, Parns? Chris: Yo, Samberg, what's crackin'? Andy: You thinkin' what I'm thinkin'? Both: Narnia! Andy: Man, it's happenin'. Chris: But first my hunger pangs are stickin like duct tape. Andy: Let's hit up Magnolia and mack on some cupcakes. Chris: No doubt, that bakery's got all the bomb frostings. Andy: I love those cupcakes like McAdams loves Gossling. Chris: Two! Andy: No, six! Chris: No, twelve! Both: Bakers' dozen! Andy: I told you that I'm crazy for these cupcakes, cousin! Chris: Yo, where's the movie playin'? Andy: Up on west side, dude! Chris: Well let's hit up Yahoo Maps to find the dopest route! Andy: I prefer MapQuest. Chris: That's a good one too. Andy: Google maps is the best! Chris: True that. Both: Double true! Andy: Yo, 68th to Broadway. Chris: Step on it, sucka! Andy: Whatcha wanna do Chris? Both: Snack attack, muthafucka! Both: The Chronic(what?)cles of Narnia. Yes, the chronic(what?)cles of Narnia. We love the chronic(what?)cles of Narnia. Pass the chronic(what?)cles of Narnia. Andy: Yo, stop at the deli, the theater's overpriced. Chris: You got the back pack? Andy: Gonna pack it up nice. Chris: Don't want security to get suspicious! Andy: Mr.Pibb and Red Vines equals crazy delicious! Chris: Yo, reach in my pocket, pull out some dough. Andy: Girl acted like she'd never seen a ten befo'. Both: It's all about the Hamiltons, baby. Andy: Throw the snacks in the bag, Chris: And I'm a ghost like Swayze. Chris: Roll up to the theater, Andy: Ticket buyin', what we're handlin' Chris: You can call us Aaron Burr, Both: From the way we're droppin' Hamiltons. Chris: Now parked in our seats, movie trivia's da illest. Andy: Whose "Friends" alum starred in films with Bruce Willis? Chris: We answered so fast it was scary. Andy: Everyone stared in awe when we screamed Both: Matthew Perry! Andy: Now quiet in the theater or it's gonna get tragic. Chris: We're about to get taken to a dream world of magic. Both: The Chronic(what?)cles of Narnia Yes, the chronic(what?)cles of Narnia We love the chronic(what?)cles of Narnia Pass the chronic(what?)cles of Narnia |
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1:04 |
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from The Lonely Island 1집 - Incredibad (2009)
Hey, what's up, man?
Ah, not much, you? Hey, are you ready for the party tonight? Yeah man, I already got a case of Santana champagne, so... Should be good. Oh, nice. Yeah, that's good champagne. Hello! Oh, shit. Oh no. This guy's a real - Oh man, don't make eye contact. Ding dong, Normal Guy in the house! Hey, man. Hey. Ah, it's great seeing you other normal guys! Oh yeah. Uh huh. What're you guys up to? Uh, not much. Nothing. Hey what are you other normal guys up to? Seriously, nothing, we're just hanging out. Do you guys know what I hate? What? Hanging out with a weirdo! Oh my god. Yeah. Hanging out with some loser weirdo! Yeah, we - It's my biggest peeve! Yeah, well, I was just actually - It's like they don't even know where we're coming from! Right, we understand. I can't take it when some weirdo shows up unannounced! Okay, well I gotta get going. There's nothing wrong with any of us! You guys can keep talking. Okay, man, we got - None of us have any major problems! Oh, man. This guy. Yeah we - Hey let's make a pact! What? Let's make a suicide pact! Uh... No, that's crazy. I'll go first. And the award for Best Comedy Sketch goes to... The Lonely Island (Who said we're wack? You said we're wack? You take it back!) Ah, thank you, thank you very much! (Who said we're wack? You talkin smack? You're gonna get smacked!) |
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3:13 |
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from The Lonely Island 1집 - Incredibad (2009)
[The Lonely Island]
Imagine in your mind a posh country club The stuffy old money where the poor get snubbed The spread is bland sauerkraut and boiled goose There's no way these people will ever cut loose But then I walk in the room, hold my boombox high And what happened next, will blow your mind [Julian Casablancas] Everything got outta control The music was so entrancing Everyone got out on the floor It was a bunch of old white people dancing [The Lonely Island] Now picture if you will a bunch of business men Stuffed in the boardroom like pigs in a pen The ties around their necks are like a hangman's noose In the middle of the table there's a boiled goose The old people smell makes you want to puke in the sink These dudes will never dance, yeah that's what you think I stride in the room all young and hip Hold up my boombox and say listen to this [Julian Casablancas] Then everyone started to move People rejoiced instead of financing Your preconceived notions were shattered By these super old white people dancing [The Lonely Island] The Big Apple, where people never dance Spirits go down while profits expand The cops or the dealers, who's got the juice The street benders peddling their boiled goose So many types of people will never get along Till I bust out my boombox and play this song [Julian Casablancas] The music washed away all the hate And society started advancing Every demographic was represented It was a rainbow coalition of dancing Whoa ! Everyone was wearing fingerless gloves Whoaaaaaoaaaaaoh ! I saw a Spanish guy doing the Bartman [The Lonely Island] Transport now to an old folks home Where the elderly are tossed on their brittle bones The orderlies are stealing, there's no excuse Everyday for lunch they eat boiled goose So I grabbed my boombox and hit the turbo base And what happened next was a total disgrace [Julian Casablancas] Everybody started having sex The music was way too powerful A bunch of old people fucking like rabbits It was disgusting to say the least Oh! A boombox can change the world You gotta know your limits with a boombox This was a cautionary tale A boombox is not a toy |
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0:34 |
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from The Lonely Island 1집 - Incredibad (2009)
I'm on a shrooms (Yeah) I'm on a shrooms (Yeah) I'm on a shrooms (Yeah) I'm on a shrooms La La La La La La La La La La La La La La La La La La La La La La La La La La I'm on a shrooms |
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1:47 |
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from The Lonely Island 1집 - Incredibad (2009)
Mr. Samberg, thanks for coming to your performance review.
No problem. So you're in charge around here, is that fair to say? Absolutely, I'm the boss. Well, so take us through a day in the life of, "The Boss". Well the first thing I do is-- Talk to corporate (like a boss) Approve memos (like a boss) Lead a workshop (like a boss) Remember birthdays (like a boss) Direct work-flow (like a boss) My own bathroom (like a boss) Micro-manage (like a boss) Promote synergy (like a boss) Hit on Deborah (like a boss) Get rejected (like a boss) Swallow sadness (like a boss) Send some faxes (like a boss) Call a sex line (like a boss) Cry deeply (like a boss) Demand a refund (like a boss) Eat a bagel (like a boss) Harassment Lawsuit (like a boss) No Promotion (like a boss) 5th of vodka (like a boss) Shit on Deborah's desk (like a boss) Buy a gun (like a boss) In my mouth (like a boss) Oh fuck man, I can't fucking do it, shit! Pussy out (like a boss) Puke on Deborah's desk (like a boss) Jump out the windows (like a boss) Suck a dude's dick (like a boss) Score some coke (like a boss) Crash my car (like a boss) Suck my own dick (like a boss) Eat some chicken strips (like a boss) Chop my balls off (like a boss) Black out in the sewer (like a boss) Meet a giant fish (like a boss) Fuck his brains out (like a boss) Turn into a jet (like a boss) Bomb the Russians (like a boss) Crash into the Sun (like a boss) Now I'm dead (like a boss) Uh huh. So that's an... average day for you then. No doubt. You chopped your balls off and died. Hell yeah. And I think at one point there you said something about sucking your own dick? Nope. Actually, I'm pretty sure you did. Nah, that ain't me. OK, well this has been eye-opening for me. I'm the boss. Ya, I know, I got that. You said it about 400 times. I'm the boss. Ya, ya, I got it. I'm the boss. No, I heard you, see you later! (like a boss) (보스처럼) |
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2:04 |
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from The Lonely Island 1집 - Incredibad (2009)
hello hi, do you want to go to a party with me? no, games on. oh, i almost forgot,i'll be right there we like sports and we dont care who knows from shooting hoops to the super bowl we like sports and we dont care who knows football, football, football tennis hockey golf the game is starting, everyone is here, i got my snacks, my friends, and a beer just 2 normal guys, hanging out, having fun right guy number 2,yeah guy number 1 E to the S to the P to the N is all i watch cause im the man if my team loses, i'll be mean all night, if you tell me to relax, we'll get in a fight watching sports with girls is a pain, they dont know the rules, theres no time to explain single, double, triple, home run before the celebration, i'll shoot my gun i like my friend, hes a real guys guy hes not a loud mouth, like that cunt hole Steve we like sports and we dont care who knows from Wimbledon to the Astrodome we like sports and we dont care who knows football, football, football tennis hockey golf now when i say SPORTZ, you say NUTZ SPORTZ NUTZ SPORTZ NUTZ when i say CHEATING, you say SUX CHEATING SUX CHEATING SUX i drink whiskey cause i like the taste, you think its bitter, but i think its great i also drink whiskey and we smoke cigars dont believe me? smell our cars we're real men, and we like sportz, if you say that we're not, then we'll see you in court im team captain and i chose you im the other team captain and i chose you too we steal the ball and we're off to the races we scare the other team with our mad dog faces like what what what what what what what what what what what what we like sports and we dont care who knows from the pre game jokes to the wrap up show we like sports and we dont care who knows football, football, football tennis hockey golf throw me the baseball now toss me the big skin now feed me the rock now give me the rock |
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3:14 |
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from The Lonely Island 1집 - Incredibad (2009)
(The following song is brought to you by Chex Mix) Some dude once said that love is a many funny things I know there's a perfect girl out there for me, 'cause I see her in my dreams Dream girl, you're a fantasy, you're the only one Out there for me My love Dream girl you amaze me, all dressed in paisley Love how not one but both eyes are lazy When I first saw you you were drivin' the bus Thick skin, strong nose like a rhinoceros Dream girl so beautiful, lips all crummy Skin like asphalt, nose so runny Thick thighs, no waist, not a care in the world You not crazy girl, you just my baby girl You're a vision in sweats with the neon patch Half eaten squirrel hangin' outta your mouth Rainbow poncho, the female Tonto Hear a loud noise drop a bucket like a bronco Dream girl, you're a fantasy, you're the only one Out there for me My love You got your cellphone ring set to Sex and the City You like a hot bowl of grits only way more gritty Straight drippin' in turquoise my Santa Fe queen One short leg you got the Santa Fe Lean It's music to my ears when you scream in your sleep And when you lift your skirt in public yo I can't help but peek You like Cleopatra with the eyes of a pig Love to watch you in the backyard when you go out to dig Girl how'd you get those mouse traps glued to your neck Little rascal, how'd you get screwed to the deck? You put away slurpees like a trash can Your smile's all stainy and you're not too brainy and I like that! Talking to your shoe like it's your friend I like that! Yellin' at the walls of make pretend I like that! Tellin' you to stop it then you don't You say you're gonna stab me in my sleep But you won't! Last week thought I saw you on the street Turns out it was a bag of trash Just a big ol' bag of trash I thought you looked like a bag of trash Dream girl I pitch a tent when you stomp in the room Like a hellbound turkey mixed with a baboon You're sexy and you're spicy like a bowl of Chex Mix And I always feel safe when I'm in your flesh mitts Your teeth so clean coulda swore you were British Never take your Chex Mix ' cause you always get skittish Open clams with both feet 'cause you're ambidextrous No point 'cause we know you eat nothin' but Chex Mix Chex Mix number one food snack in the land It's the cereal taste that you eat with your hand Chex Mix at your local grocer buy a box Your family will all say CHEX MIX ROCKS! Chex Mix, you're the snack for me, you're the only one I'll ever eat or buy Chex Mix, you're delicious, you got 60% less fat than potato chips TM |
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2:05 |
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from The Lonely Island 1집 - Incredibad (2009)
Jah!
Rastafarianism Yes I, Ras Trent Ba da ding ding ding ding whoa Who dem? You no want test me champion sound Oh fire pon Babylon And fire pon a batty boy Rude boy livin in the shanty dorms My roommate Nick is an ignorant bald head Now chant down Babylon midterm essays Then puff from de chalice I fi make from a Sprite can Last week I read a book about Selassie I Then told my bomboclat parents I was switching religions Excuse I Oh hot stepper, you do so many dutty crimes Nyabinghi And plus you're fully skylarking all the time Oodah look ya now Have you ever noticed how bald heads suck? Ba da da ding ding ding ding dong dang ding dong duck Excuse I for my skanking, give thanks and praise Me toil part time at jah Cold Stone Creamery Inna dub style... Roller skates A dvd of Cool Runnings Murder, She Wrote Yagga yagga yagga yow Are you there Jah? It's me, Ras Trent Are you there Jah? It's me, Ras Trent Are you there Jah? It's me, Ras Trent Please guide me pon your bike path of righteousness Oh stannahoy, stannahoy, stannahoy, stannahoy Jah! Fussing and fighting and Zion and Roots Red Stripe, Shabba, Ragamuffin, and culture Me night nurse never want to plant de corn Skiddily whoa Diddily, skiddily biddily biddily whoa |
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2:41 |
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from The Lonely Island 1집 - Incredibad (2009)
Hey girl I got somethin` real important to give you
So just sit down and listen Girl you know we`ve been together such a long long time (such a long time) And now I`m ready to lay it on the line (Wooow) You know it`s Christmas and my heart is open wide Gonna give you something so you know what`s on my mind A gift real special, so take off the top Take a look inside it`s my dick in a box Not gonna get you a diamond ring That sort of gift don`t mean anything Not gonna get you a fancy car Girl ya gotta know you`re my shining star Not gonna get you a house in the hills A girl like you needs somethin` real Wanna get you somethin` from the heart Somethin` special girl It`s my dick in a box, my dick in a box babe It`s my dick in a box, my dick in a box girl See I`m wise enough to know when a gift needs givin` (yeah) And I got just the one, somethin` to show ya that you are second to none To all the fellas out there with ladies to impress It`s easy to do just follow these steps 1: Cut a hole in a box 2: Put your junk in that box 3: Make her open the box And that`s the way you do it It`s my dick in a box... my dick in a box babe It`s my dick in a box, my dick in a box girl Christmas; dick in a box Hanukkah; dick in a box Kwanzaa; a dick in a box Every single holiday a dick in a box Over at your parent`s house a dick in a box Mid day at the grocery store a dick in a box Backstage at the CMA`s a dick in a box (yeah-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow) a dick in a box.. |
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1:06 |
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from The Lonely Island 1집 - Incredibad (2009)
(No I'm being serious)
Yo It's the Wild Wild West You came to the right place, my man Get ready, here we go (New shit) Welcome my friends, to The Old Saloon Everyone in town is hangin out If you got a drink, well you drink it down Then we'll all go have sex with whores (Brand new) Buffalo Bill, I just rode into town On my horse? You betcha on my horse That's the thing in the Old West times Everybody enjoys a good horse ride If you cheat at cards you'll get thrown out Right out the saloon doors on your butt Come back in and buy a round of whiskey Guess what? All is forgiven! (DJ Larry) Well I understand you're Calamity Jane And you're another guy that's probably an Injin Man this whiskey is warm and it smells like piss (DJ Larry) Oh no! My 'stache smells like piss! So that's your story, I'm stickin to it The Old Wild West is no place for a lady I'm the bartender but I'm also the Mayor So, just put that in your pipe and smoke it (DJ Lah...) Tiny Tim, man it's almost Christmas Sure is dusty here |
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2:47 |
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from The Lonely Island 1집 - Incredibad (2009)
JORMA These days, a lot of catz is outta line ANDY Seems to me like they need to get punched JORMA Yeah, but where you gonna punch them? ANDY Yo, the choice is obvious ANDY I'll punch you in the jeans, I'll punch you in the jeans This is not a case of man vs. machine JORMA You think that you're safe, thought you got away clean ANDY I'll roll up on you smooth and punch you in the jeans JORMA I've got my fist clenched, gonna throw a hay-maker Rockin' your slacks from here to jaimaca Shaking your boots 'cause I'm the earth-quaker Bringing those jeans around here was a mistake-a ANDY I got a vendetta, it's against your jeans Gonna put my knuckles up against the seams They could be on your legs, or on the clothes line But when I see the zipper and cloth, it's go time JORMA And I'm zeroed in, I got the tunnel-vision ANDY Gonna cover you in sh*t like a ton of pigeons JORMA Man I hate your jeans, I'm gonna bruise that denim JORMA It really doesn't matter, as long as you're in 'em ANDY & JORMA Yo we'll punch your jeans, we said it before Best believe this is not a metaphor Better watch your back, 'cause we're on the creek, and we won't stop until your jeans are six feet deep JORMA Man I'll murder your jeans, I'll feed 'em to the fishes, Here's what I'd do if I had three wishes Punch your jeans on all three counts It would bring me satisfaction in large amounts ANDY Yo, if I had three wishes I would do the same We see eye to eye in this jean punch game (yeah) I'd lay them in a field where there's chemical spray But I'd punch them first JORMA Yo that goes without sayin' (yeah) Acid wash, pleats, or a nifty cuff It's just another jean for my fist to stuff ANDY Throwing fist to cuffs, eat pants like bagged lunches Jeans pronounced dead JORMA Cause of death? ANDY Hecka punches ANDY & JORMA Yo we'll punch your jeans, we said it before, Best believe this is not a metaphor You got something to say? We got the proper retorts Beat your jeans so bad that they wish they were shorts ANDY Gonna revise your Levi's with physical harm Put divets in the rivets with my physical arm JORMA Gonna beat those jeans, wanna dip 'em in slime Turn your 501's into 499's ANDY When I punch your jean I like to imagine a face The fly is the nose and the balls are the base of the face JORMA You got taste and it shows, my man ANDY God damn your jean brand got me throwing my hand JORMA Gonna go back in time and find the man who made jeans And choke him to death, if you know what I mean ANDY Yo I know what you mean, so keep your jeans on a hush So breakout out out When you get a bum rushed ANDY & JORMA You we'll punch your jeans, we said it before Best believe this is not a metaphor So take off your jeans and reverse the curse 'Cause we're the best jean punchers in the universe JORMA It really doesn't matter as long as you're in 'em (x2) |
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2:55 |
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from The Lonely Island 1집 - Incredibad (2009)
Reach for the stars!
You stand on a distant planet Skyline of red plateaus Strange air and vegetation You're a winner! Welcome to the Space Olympics The year Thirty Twenty Two Take part in a grand tradition Your name echoes in the holes of the universe! Believe in yourself! Take your game into outer space! Every single galactic athlete Needs a coded ID badge Drug tests are mandatory You're a winner! The Athlete's Village is on Zargon You all get a junior suite We don't cover incidentals So keep your ass off the minibar! You're the best in the world! Brace yourself 'cause there's no gravity! You're in the motherfuckin' Space Olympics! Let it be known by every nation You'll only get one meal a day There was a bit of a budget SNAFU And food funding is insufficient We can't really enforce a curfew As there is no light or sound Just one of the many problems With hosting a sporting event in space. Attention all athletes. There are minor scheduling adjustments. Space Disc! Is totally cancelled. Space Swords! Is totally cancelled. Space Luge! Is also cancelled. And all other events are pending! Welcome to your Space Olympics All the oxygen has run out And someone who will not be named Accidentally hit self-destruct As you file to your escape pods I'll distract the alien hordes And as I stare death in the face I know my sins will take me to hell. You do it for the love My love And there ain't no woman that could take your spot my love |
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2:27 |
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from The Lonely Island 1집 - Incredibad (2009)
We're sitting here today with film star Natalie Portman
Hello, so Natalie, what's the day In life of Natalie Portman like? Do you really wanna know? Please, tell us I don't sleep motherfucker off that yak and Durban Doin' one twenty, gettin' head while I'm swervin' Damn Natalie, you a crazy chick Yo, shut the fuck up and suck my dick I bust in dudes mouth like gushers motherfucker Roll up on NBC and smack the shit outta Jeff Zucker What you want, Natalie? To drink and fight What you need, Natalie? To fuck all night Don't test when I'm crazy on that airplane glue Put my foot down your throat till you shit in my shoe Leave you screaming, pay for my dry cleaning Fuck your man, it's my name that he's screamin' I'm sorry Natalie, but are we to believe you Condone driving while intoxicated? I never said I was a role model What about the kids that look up to you? Do you have a message for them? All the kids lookin' up to me can suck my dick It's Portman motherfucker, drink till I'm sick Slit your throat and poor nitrous down the hole Watch you laugh and cry while I laugh you die And all the dudes you know I'm talkin' to you We love you Natalie, I wanna fuck you too P is for Portman, P is for pussy I'll kill your fuckin' dog for fun, so don't push me Well, Natalie I'm surprised All this from a Harvard graduate Well, there's a lot you may not know about me Really? Such as? When I was in Harvard I smoked weed every day I cheated every test and snorted all the yay I gotta a def posse and you gotta bunch of dudes I sit right down on your face and take a shit Natalie, you are a bad ass bitch, hell yeah And I always pay for your dry cleanin' When my shit gets in your shoe, what? And as for the drug use, well I can vouch for that My dick is scared of you, girl Okie-dokie, one final question If you can steal a smooch from Any guy in Hollywood, who would it? No more questions, what |
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2:54 |
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from The Lonely Island 1집 - Incredibad (2009)
Now let's take a trip down memory lane
Back to junior high school where it all began Three bad little kids raising hell at school We were just thirteen straight actin' a fool Every day after class, kiv's house was the spot Making crazy prank calls hoping not to get caught Best friends, blood brothers, yo, we one and the same 'Till one fateful afternoon when everything changed One day playing punch out up in kiv's room The house started shaking and we heard a "kaboom" Looked out the back window saw a billow of smoke Yo, your backyard is smashed, man this isn't a joke (Let's go check this out man!) (I bet, let's go) All the smoke and debris led straight to the basement Yo, what the hell is that? man, it looks like a spaceship! We all ran for cover and the hatch opened wide And a little green dude stepped out from inside He said, "I'm from mars, and I come in peace I have something to ask, and it's not discreet There's a mutated strain in our dna helix And you three kids are the ones who can heal it" But we're just thirteen, man, what can we do? "Um, how should I put this? I think we should screw" (what?) "On our home planet we can no longer breed I've been sent a self-receptacle for storing your seed" Storing our seed? yo, I think he means sex Man, I'm a virgin, we all are, bad! "I'm just gonna lie here, and close my eyes" Aw, what should we do? now it's spreading it's thighs! "You'll be heroes on our planet!" but why us three? "You're the chosen ones, you'll just have to trust me" (Yo should we do it?) (I don't know!) (Yo, I say we put it to a vote.) All in favor, say aye. aye! Okay, we're in! "cool." Who should go first? "I have three depositories to capture your burst" Wait, at the same time? "yeah, that's what I was thinking Now here's some wine coolers, let's get you boys drinking" We pounded the drinks, and started getting tipsy We took our positions, and started getting frisky One in the front and two in the back Had it locked up like a Chinese finger trap "Keep pumping away! my wife and family thank you" I'm about to explode! yo son, me too! Three way climax! best friends forever! Who would thought that we've lost our virginities together "Andy, Jorm and Kiv, you've saved our race Your reward is one wish then I'll go back to space" We looked at eachother, didn't have to talk Knew exactly what he wanted before he took off Mr. alien sir, for what it's worth We wanna be the greatest fake mc's on earth "your wish is granted, and thanks again You may have saved my planet but I'm losing three friends What happened today was both incredible and bad Therefore your name is incredibad" |
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from The Lonely Island - I'm On A Boat [single] (2009)
Shorty
Aww shit get your towels ready it's about to go down Everybody in the place hit the fucking deck But stay on your motherfucking toes We running this let's go I'm on a boat I'm on a boat Everybody look at me cause I'm sailing on a boat I'm on a boat I'm on a boat Take a good hard look at the motherfucking boat I'm on a boat motherfucker take a look at me Straight floating on a boat on the deep blue sea Busting five knots wind whipping out my coat You can't stop me motherfucker cause I'm on a boat Take a picture trick I'm on a boat bitch We drinking Santana champ Cause it's so crisp I got my swim trunks And my flippie floppies I'm flipping burgers you at Kinko's Straight flipping copies I'm riding on a dolphin doing flips and shit The dolphin's splashing getting everybody all wet But this ain't Seaworld this is real as it gets I'm on a boat motherfucker don't you ever forget I'm on a boat and It's going fast and I got a nautical themed pashmina afghan I'm the king of the world On a boat like Leo If you're on the shore then you're sure not me oh Get the fuck up this boat is REAL Fuck land I'm on a boat motherfucker Fuck trees I climb buoys motherfucker I'm on the deck with my boys motherfucker This boat engine make noise motherfucker Hey ma if you could see me now Arms spread wide on the starboard bow Gonna fly this boat to the moon somehow Like Kevin Garnett anything is possible Yeah never thought I'd be on a boat It's a big blue watery road Poseidon Look at me oh Never thought I'd see the day When a big boat coming my way Believe me when I say I fucked a mermaid I'm on a boat I'm on a boat Everybody look at me cause I'm sailing on a boat I'm on a boat I'm on a boat Take a good hard look at the mothafuckin' boat |
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2:37 |
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from The Lonely Island - I'm On A Boat [Edited Version] [single] (2009)
Shorty
Aww shit get your towels ready it's about to go down Everybody in the place hit the fucking deck But stay on your motherfucking toes We running this let's go I'm on a boat I'm on a boat Everybody look at me cause I'm sailing on a boat I'm on a boat I'm on a boat Take a good hard look at the motherfucking boat I'm on a boat motherfucker take a look at me Straight floating on a boat on the deep blue sea Busting five knots wind whipping out my coat You can't stop me motherfucker cause I'm on a boat Take a picture trick I'm on a boat bitch We drinking Santana champ Cause it's so crisp I got my swim trunks And my flippie floppies I'm flipping burgers you at Kinko's Straight flipping copies I'm riding on a dolphin doing flips and shit The dolphin's splashing getting everybody all wet But this ain't Seaworld this is real as it gets I'm on a boat motherfucker don't you ever forget I'm on a boat and It's going fast and I got a nautical themed pashmina afghan I'm the king of the world On a boat like Leo If you're on the shore then you're sure not me oh Get the fuck up this boat is REAL Fuck land I'm on a boat motherfucker Fuck trees I climb buoys motherfucker I'm on the deck with my boys motherfucker This boat engine make noise motherfucker Hey ma if you could see me now Arms spread wide on the starboard bow Gonna fly this boat to the moon somehow Like Kevin Garnett anything is possible Yeah never thought I'd be on a boat It's a big blue watery road Poseidon Look at me oh Never thought I'd see the day When a big boat coming my way Believe me when I say I fucked a mermaid I'm on a boat I'm on a boat Everybody look at me cause I'm sailing on a boat I'm on a boat I'm on a boat Take a good hard look at the mothafuckin' boat |
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2:48 |
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from The Lonely Island - I Just Had Sex [single] (2010)
[Lonely Island]
Sometimes Something beautiful happens in this world [Akon] Oh Akon And Lonely Island [Lonely Island] You don't know how to express yourself so You just gotta sing [Akon] I just had sex And it felt so good A woman let me put my penis inside her I just had sex And I'll never go back To the not-having-sex Ways of the past [Andy Samberg] Have you ever had sex? I have, it felt great It felt so good when I did it with my penis A girl let me do it It literally just happened Having sex could make a nice man out' the meanest [Jorma] You'll never guess where I just came from I had sex If I had to describe the feeling it was the best When I had the sex Man my penis felt great And I called my parents right after I was done [Andy Samberg] Oh hey, didn't see you there Guess what I just did Had sex, undressed, saw her boobies and the rest [Jorma] Well sure Nice of her to let you do that thing [Andy Samberg] Nice of any girl ever [Jorma] Now sing [Akon] I just had sex And it felt so good A woman let me put my penis inside her Wanna tell the world [Andy Samberg] To be honest I'm surprised she even wanted me to do it [Jorma] Doesn't really make sense [Andy Samberg] But man, screw it I ain't one to argue with a good thing She could be my wife [Jorma] That good? [Andy Samberg] The best 30 seconds of my life [Jorma] I'm so humbled by a girls ability to let me do her [Andy Samberg] Cuz honestly I'd have sex with a pile of manure With that in mind the soft, nice-smellin' girl's better [Jorma] She let me wear my chain and my turtle neck sweater [Akon] So this one's dedicated to them girls That let us flop around on top of them If you're near or far, whether short or tall We wanna thank you all for lettin' us fuck you [Jorma] She kept looking at her watch [Akon] Doesn't matter, had sex [Andy Samberg] But I cried the whole time [Akon] Doesn't matter, had sex [Jorma] I think she might have been a racist [Akon] Doesn't matter, had sex [Andy Samberg] She put a bag on my head [Akon] Still counts I just had sex And my dreams came true So if you had sex in the last 30 minutes then you're qualified to sing with me I just had sex And it felt so good A woman let me put my penis inside her I just had sex And I'll never go back To the not-having-sex Ways of the past |
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2:41 |
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from The Lonely Island - The Creep [single] (2011)
When you're out at a club and you see a fly girl do the creep and do the creep And if you wanna make friends at the ATM Do the creep And do the creep Well we got a new dance so get up on your feet It's real easy to do and it's called the creep Let your hands flop round like a marionette Pop your knees up and down sh sh shakin' your neck Now pull your waistband up like you expecting a flood And stick your hair down flat like it was covered in mud Trim up your pencil mustache and pop them peepers Put this in your speakers you a certified creeper When you see a country bitch laying out at the beach Do the creep And do the creep And when a fine PYT walks in front of your tree do the creep And do the creep I was six years old when I started creeping My parents took it to their room and I started peeping you can imagine their surprise when they lifted their heads And saw my little ass creeping at the foot of the bed And they knew I was a creep since the day I was born Get popping out of momma like some chemical And the doctor saw my head and he starting freaking Cause I came clean and I came out creeping Nicki Nicki Nicki Nicki Nicki Nicki When I was a girl I creeped in the boys locker room Hide deep inside it was my little creep stalker room As they disrobed I was oogling and oggling Little did they know that for me they was modelling And I would laugh ha ha ha ha ha ha ha And they would dance la la la la la la la laaa So pop pop pop your peepers and turn out your sneakers Don't sleep come and get ya creep on with me Go get ya sweating off ya bride at her wedding do the creep And do the creep But when you sneek into a wake and you see a beefcake Do the creep And do the creep When the judge is a hottie and you can't control ya body Do the creep And do the creep So get ya knees flexin' and your arms T rexin' Do the creep And do the creep And don't forget to smile |
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1:51 |
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from The Lonely Island - We're Back! [single] (2011)
aye yo, new lonely island, 2011
let’s get ‘em kiv! aye yo my dick don’t work, that shit is soft as a pillow my girlie lookin’ at me like “you for real dude?” aye yo, hold up, hold up, we gotta come harder than that! yo tell ‘em andy! i think there might be something wrong with my dick it’s like a melted stick of butter so soft that it can’t fill a rubber. aye yo come on man, this is lonely island, people are countin’ on us, i gotta run all these motherfuckers myself! whoo! aye yo i think i broke my dick in the sink it’s so small and ugly, all smashed and flat like it was playin’ rugby. hold up hold up, this is serious, kiv let ‘em know! yo for real though, i suffer from stinky dick. every time i take a piss it smells just like shit. haha yeah that’s what i’m talkin’ ’bout! andy show ‘em how it’s done! my dick looks like the fat that you cut off a steak, smashed in like my balls went and stepped on a rake. lonely island! grammy nominated, yea! hit ‘em again! yo straight out the box with my soggy little shrimp i was a eight year old girl before the doctor found my dick. we make too much money for this shit, murder music! i shit the bed cause my dick played a prank on my butt hit em! straight crept when i slept and stuck a laxative up.. suppository music! whatchy’all know about incontinence?! i got hepatitis c from horse, but no confusion, jeah! it wasn’t from the sex it was a blood transfusion! what?! motherfucker got horse blood! what y’all got? i write freaky fan fiction where cartoons fuck got cgi garfield lickin’ marmaduke’s nuts whoo! i would like to see that! this is that garfield sex music! now ya’ll just showin off! preach! i got a friend named reggie who lives down at the dump every other week i swing by and bring him some lunch oh!! now that just sounds nice! ima call it right there, game over motherfuckers! lonely island, we started this fake rap shit! the world needs us! |
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2:50 |
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from The Lonely Island - Motherlover [digital single] (2011)
oh dang what is it dawg i forgot its mothers day didnt get a gift for her other plans got in the way she'll be so dissapointed damn i forgot it too this could've been avoided what the hell are we gonna do my mom's been so alone ever since my daddy left cold no one to hold her tight life as put her to the test i know just what you mean my mom's been so sad and grey word my dad can't satisfy her in the bedroom ever since he passed away HOLD UP you thinkin what im thinkin im thinkin im thinkin too SLOW UP what time is it dawg it's time for a switcharoo we both love our moms women with grown women needs i say we break them off show them how much they really mean cause i'm a mother lover you're a mother lover we sould fuck each others mother's fuck each others moms ill push in that place where you came out as a baby no doubt that shit is crazy fucking each others moms cause every mothers day needs a mothers night if doing it is wrong i dont wanna be right i'm calling on you cuz i cant do it myself to me your like a brother so be my mother lover i'm layin in the cut waiting for your mom clutchin on this lube and roses i got my digital camera i'm a make your momma do a million poses they will be so suprised we are so cool and thoughtfull cant wait to pork your mom ima be the syrup she can be my waffle show love my momma loves bubble bath with chamomile straight up give it to my mom d d d d d d doggy style this a perfect plan for a perfect mothers day they'll have to rename this one all up under the covers day cause i'm a mother lover you're a mother lover we sould fuck each others mother's fuck each others moms ill push in that place where you came out as a baby aint no doubt that shit is crazy fucking each others moms break it down it would be my honor to be your new step father it would be my honor to be your new step father ill let you do my mother make me another brother and im gonna do your mother ill never use a rubber OH cause every mothers day needs a mothers night if doing it is wrong i dont wanna be right i'm calling on you cuz i cant do it myself to me your like a brother so be my mother lover they blessed us both with the gift of life she brought you in this world so ima sex her right this is the second best idea that we've ever had the choice can be no other be my mother lover HAPPY MOTHERS DAY |
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1:50 |
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from The Lonely Island 2집 - Turtleneck & Chain (2011)
[Jorma Taccone]
Ayo, new Lonely Island! 2011! Let’s get ‘em, Kiv! [Akiva Schaffer] Ayo, my dick don’t work, that shit is soft as a pillow My girlie lookin’ at me like “You for real, dude?” [Jorma] Ayo, hold up, hold up We gotta come harder than that! Yo, tell ‘em, Andy [Andy Samberg] I think there might be somethin’ wrong with my dick It’s like a melted stick of butter, so soft that it can’t feel the rubber Ayo, come on, man This is Lonely Island! People are countin’ on us! I gotta write all these motherfuckers myself! [Jorma] Ayo, I think I broke my dick in the sink It’s so small and ugly All splashed and flat like it was playin’ rugby Hold up, hold up, this is serious Kiv, let ‘em know [Akiva] Yo, for real though, I suffer from stinky dick Every time I take a piss it smell just like shit [Jorma] Haha, yeah, that’s what I’m talkin’ ’bout Andy, show ‘em how it’s done [Andy] My dick looks like the fat that you cut off a steak Smashed in like my balls went and stepped on a rake [Jorma] Lonely Island! Grammy-nominated, yeah! (Hit ‘em again) [Akiva] Yo, straight out the box with my soggy little shrivel I was an eight-year-old girl before the doctor found my dick [Jorma] We make too much money for this shit Murder music [Andy] I shit the bed ’cause my dick played a prank on my butt Straight tripped when I slept, and stuck a laxative up [Jorma] Suppository music! What y’all know about incontinence!? [Akiva] I got hepatitis C from a horse, but no confusion It wasn’t from the sex, it was a blood transfusion [Jorma] What? Motherfucker got horse blood! What y’all got!? [Andy] I write freaky fan fiction where cartoons fuck Got CGI Garfield lickin’ Marmaduke’s nuts [Jorma] Woo, I would like to see that! This is that Garfield sex music! Now y’all just show me love, preach [Akiva] I got a friend named Reggie who lives down at the dump (Tell ‘em) Every other week I swing by to bring him some lunch [Jorma] Oh, now that just sounds nice! I’ma call it right there! Game over, motherfuckers! Lonely Island, we started this fake rap shit The world needs us! |
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2:00 |
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from The Lonely Island 2집 - Turtleneck & Chain (2011)
This one goes out
from the bottom of our hearts to the most important lady in our lives It's time to pay some respect I hope you proud of us 'cause we're proud of you Mama! You raised me right Mama! Showed me the light Mama! Through pain and strife Mama! You gave us life When I fell down you were there to pick me up When I felt bad you were there to build me up Gave everything you had in the world to me and you made me the man I'm supposed to be Jane, even though I don't say it often enough I appreciate everything you did for us Never take you for granted 'cause it ain't hard to see the best parts of you are now a part of me Ah Mama! And when it was cold outside, you kept us warm and held us down... [Mom]Hi boys, who wants a snack? [Andy] MOM, GET OUT WE'RE IN THE STUDIO! [Jorma] OH MY GOD! [Mom] Just checking on my guys! [Jorma] GET OUT OF HERE! [Andy] WE'RE MAKING A TRACK YOU IDIOT! [Mom] Oooohhh! [Andy] JUST LEAVE! [Mom] Okie doke [Jorma] GO! GO! [Andy] YOU SUCK, MOM! Yeah my one true love, my heart, my ma Show her respect in the form of this song so when life gets hard and it makes you cry I'll always be there to wipe a tear from your eye My mom's my number one fan, my best friend and I'll never disrespect... *Door opens* [Jorma] MOM! [Mom] I know you said you were'nt hungry, but I made ants on a log [Andy] GET THE f-ck OUT [Jorma] LEAVE! LEAVE ME! GO! [Mom] So how's your little club going? [Andy] IT'S NOT A CLUB! [Jorma] IT'S A RAP GROUP! [Mom] Well I'll leave these here and eat them if you... [Jorma] FINE! [Andy] GO TO HELL, MOM! She's an angel on earth with invisible wings I put no one above in summer, winter or spring, or fall... *Door opens* [Mom] Have you guys seen the remote? [Andy] OH MY GOD! [Jorma] LEAVE US ALONE! [Andy] f-ck YOU MOM! [Jorma] LEAVE US ALONE! *window smashes* [Mom] Watch it [Andy] I HOPE YOU f-ckING DIE! Jump in front of a bullet if it could save my mom You got a a gun going bullet 'cause you will never see harm... *Door opens* [Mom] Nevermind, I found it *They all scream/shout/gl-ss smashes* ['Dale'] Laura, everything ok? [Andy] SHUT THE f-ck UP DALE! [Jorma] SHUT UP! [Mom] Hey! Be nice to Dale [Andy] f-ck DALE! [Jorma] f-ck DALE! [Andy] I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU HAVE s-x WITH THAT GUY! This goes out to all the mamas trying to protect their kids from drama Love was your goal to bring No matter what they say, you're beautifull so push them lighters in the sky, wave 'em back from side to side And if you feel lost and alone, let our voices guide you home [Mom] Is something burning down there? [Andy] GET THE f-ck OUT NOW! |
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2:47 |
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from The Lonely Island 2집 - Turtleneck & Chain (2011)
[Andy Samberg]
Sometimes (Oh-oh-ohhh) Something beautiful happens in this world (Akon!) You don’t know how to express yourself, so (And Lonely Island!) You just gotta sing [Akon] I just had sex (Ay) And it felt so good (Felt so good) A woman let me put my penis inside of her (Her) I just had se-ay-ee-ex And I’ll never go back (Never go back) To the not-havin’-sex ways of the past [Samberg] Have you ever had sex? I have, it felt great (Yeah) It felt so good when I did it with my penis (Yeah) A girl let me do it, it literally just happened Having sex should make a nice man out the meanest [Jorma Taccone] Never guess where I just came from, I had sex If I had to describe the feelin’, it was the best When I had the sex, man, my penis felt great And I called my parents right after I was done [Samberg] Oh, hey, didn’t see you there, guess what I just did? Had sex, undressed, saw her boobies and the rest (Was sure nice of her to let you do that thing) Nice of any girl ever (Now sing) I just had sex (Ay) And it felt so good (Felt so good) A woman let me put my penis inside of her (Her) I wanna tell the world To be honest, I’m surprised she even wanted me to do it (Doesn’t really make sense) But man, screw it (I ain’t one to argue with a good thing) She could be my wife! (That good?) The best thirty seconds of my life I’m so humbled by a girl’s ability to let me do her ‘Cause honestly, I’d have sex with a pile of manure With that in mind, a soft, nice-smellin’ girl’s better Plus she let me wear my chain and my turtleneck sweaters So this one’s dedicated to them girls That let us flop around on top of them If you’re near or far, whether short or tall We wanna thank you all for lettin’ us fuck you She kept lookin’ at her watch (Doesn’t matter, had sex!) But I cried the whole time (Doesn’t matter, had sex!) I think she might’ve been a racist (Doesn’t matter, had sex!) She put a bag on my head (Still counts!) I just had sex (Ay) And my dreams came true (Dreams came true) So if you had sex in the last thirty minutes Then you qualified to sing with me I just had se-e-ex (Everybody sing!) And it felt so good (We all had sex!) A woman let me put my penis inside of her I just had se-ay-ee-ex (I just had sex) And I’ll never go back (Never go back) To the not-havin’-sex ways of the past |
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3:08 |
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from The Lonely Island 2집 - Turtleneck & Chain (2011)
Secretary: Guys, Michael Bolton is here
Oh Great, send him in. Michael Bolton: Hey guys. Hey, hi, thanks for coming Michael Bolton: Sorry I'm late, I got caught up watching that Pirates of the Carribean marathon. Have you seen those things? Oh yeah, yeah, those are, those are great. Michael Bolton: Well, I checked out the track and I loved it. And I wrote you this big sexy hook I think you're really gonna dig. Oh wow that's great, awesome. Should we just lay it down? Michael Bolton: Boys, lets get to it. Whisper: Here we go. Ungh, Lonely Island, Michael Bolton YEAAAHH! The night starts now Together on the track, the boys are back The night starts now Night starts now baby roll with us, chickens snapping at the neck when we rollin' up. ROLLIN' UP Blow through the doors ain't no holdin' up YEAH Black card at the bar like I gives a fuck. COME ON Ladies shifty eyed when we walk into the set, fuck the fellas looking jealous play the back and get wet YEAH YEAH Three pound in my waist, shank in my sock, you either get cut, get stuffed or get shot. THIS IS THE TALE OF CAPTAIN JACK SPARROW, PIRATE SO BRAVE ON THE SEVEN SEAS What? A MYSTICAL QUEST TO THE ISLE OF TORTUGA, RAVEN LOCKS SWAY ON THE OCEAN'S BREEZE. Yeah that was kinda weird, but we're back in the club Buying up the bar so the groupies show us love KIERA KNIGHTLY Motherfucking ice-man, I'm the top gunner Heater on blast, I'm the number one stunner JACK SPARROW Watch it girl cause I ain't your "Mr. Nice Guy", More like the "meet ya take you home and fuck you twice guy" YEAH YEAH! All dressed up with nowhere to run, And now I make you feel crazy with the?? NOW BACK TO THE GOOD PART: FROM THE DAY HE WAS BORN, HE YEARNED FOR ADVENTURE Nooo OLD CAPTAIN JACK GIVING THEM WHAT FOR. HE'S THE PAUPER OF THE SURF (yeah?쫢h huh) THE JESTER OF TORTUGA (oh God) BUT IS DAVY JONES' LOCKER WHAT LIES IN STORE? Yeah, we've seen the movie Throw your hands in the air and say hell yeah, come on CAPTAIN JACK What? JOHNNY DEPP No From the front to the back say we count stacks come on DAVY JONES Nope GIANT SQUID Wrong Michael Bolton we're really gonna need you to focus up ROGER THAT LET ME TRY IT WITH ANOTHER FILM Wait-- LIFE IS A BOX OF CHOCOLATES AND MY NAME IS FORREST GUMP (Not better) THOUGH I'M NOT THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED, I GIVE JENNY ALL OF MY LOVE (Come on!) OK THEN I'M A LEGAL AIDE, ERIN BROCKOVICH IS MY NAME (Nooo, God) THEN YOU CAN CALL ME SCARFACE, SNORTIN MOUNTAINS OF COCAINE (close enough) YOU COCKROACHES WANNA PLAY ROUGH? OKAY, I'M RELOADED THIS IS THE TALE OF TONY MONTANYA CUBANO FLAME, WITH THE MIAMI NUTS (Take it home!) GOT A BASEHEAD WIFE, BUT HER WOMB IS POLLUTED THIS WHOLE TOWN'S A PUSSY, JUST WAITING TO GET FUCKED! Ooookay, turns out Michael Bolton is a major cinephile YOU COMPLETE ME! Yup, yeah, ok?? |
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1:52 |
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from The Lonely Island 2집 - Turtleneck & Chain (2011)
White girls!
You are attracted to us! Black girls! You are attracted to us! Asian girls! You are attracted to us! Latinas! You are attracted to us! Attracted to us! But you're never gonna get it Never never gonna get it No you're never gonna get it Because we're shy, we're shy, we're shy We're all so shy You're never gonna get it We're so sweet and shy All you pretty girls We know you want our bodies But we're more the [?] types Yea yea yea yea But you're never gonna get it Never never gonna get it No you're never gonna get it Because we're shy, we're shy, we're shy We're nice and shy You're never gonna get it We're polite and shy Nerdy girls! You are attracted to us! Oh-My-God girls! You are attracted to us! [?] girls! You are attracted to us! Cha-cha-cha girls! You are attracted to us! Space girls! You are attracted to us! You are attracted to us! Cause we are shy |
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2:34 |
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from The Lonely Island 2집 - Turtleneck & Chain (2011)
Here's a little story that I think you'll like
It's not about Shaq or Iron Mike So buckle your seatbelts, it's gonna get choppy And listen to the tale of the time I fought Rocky One day me and all my friends were hangin' Talkin' 'bout which of the girls was most bangin' Then one friend says, "You know who's really tough? "Rocky," (hit me home) "the boxer." Man, I said, "Yeah I know him. What about him?" He said, "He's really tough." "No way, man. I'm calling your bluff "I think that I can take him and, to prove my point, "I'll challenge him in public." (Yeah, that's the joint!) So the very next day, stayed true to my word And I snuck on T.V. so I could be heard I said, 'Rocky, if you're out there, I think you're a nerd. "And I'll lick you and bury you like a dog turd!" I got kicked out, but the candle was lit 'Cause the people had to know if my claim was legit It made the headlines and I got the call It was Rocky ("Hey") and he wanted to brawl We negotiated terms and set the date Then I went into training to add some muscle weight While I punched on meat in a rickety shack He was sippin' on wine, having models rub his back At the weigh-in, boy the tension was high Me and Rock, toe-to-toe and eye-to-eye I talked some trash, we got pulled apart I shot him one last look to strike fear in his heart Skip ahead, the big night was finally here My body was ripped and my mind was clear We entered the arena to the roar of the crowd People chantin' my name - I never felt so proud Faced off once more in the center of the ring Touched gloves, said a prayer and the bell went *ding* He hit me with a left and shattered my face And a right sent my teeth all over the place Then another great punch caved-in my eye socket He broke my jaw and my trainer yelled, "Stop it!" But nobody heard him and he crushed my ribs Blood sprayed off my face and onto some kids They yelled out, "More!" and Rocky obliged I had to think of some way to turn the tides So I leaned back to hit him with all of my might Took a swing, but he caught me with a sucker punch right Then a sucker punch left and a sucker punch right Then twenty-two consecutive sucker punch rights He tore off my arms and beat me with 'em Then threw acid in my face which obscured my vision He kicked me in the leg and fractured my shin The bone splinters shot right out of my skin People barfed in the crowd; they were going insane And Rocky punched my nose-bone into my brain I was quivering and twitching when I soiled my shorts Then Rocky pissed on me (customary in sports) The doctor came out and pronounced me dead And that was the night I fought Rocky |
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0:23 |
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from The Lonely Island 2집 - Turtleneck & Chain (2011)
Okay,
My mic sounds nice check one My mic sounds nice check two My mic sounds nice check three My mic sounds nice check four My mic sounds nice check five My mic sounds nice check six Our mics sound nice check sevennnnnnn |
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2:44 |
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from The Lonely Island 2집 - Turtleneck & Chain (2011)
Turtle neck and chain
Turtle neck and chain Turtle neck and chain Sippin' on a light beer My turtle neck phat and my chain so thin And I'm sippin' light beer and my crew right here Chain razor thin, light beer in my cup And my sweater on turtle with the neck on puff Huge turtle neck and my chain so skinny Beer light all night stand up get dizzy Light cup beer drink thin so chain neck turtle phat man I won't say it again Turtle neck and chain Turtle neck and chain Turtle neck and chain Sippin' on a light beer Turtle neck check with another on deck 'Case I spill something on it Like some light beer? Yes We be bragging 'bout who's chain the thinnest Turtle neck thicker than Delta Burke swimming in the guiness Now musicjuzz.blogspot.com bare with me What they can't see my chain Metal so thin it dissolve when it rain Got more chain than the snow patrol Every one razor thin like an insect's stripper pole Turtle neck and chain Turtle neck and chain Turtle neck and chain Sippin' on a light beer Chain so light when the police roll by Man it flow Man it flow And my beer so light you can see right through it like a ghost And I also wear turtle necks Sweaters while I wing my chain like it's stuck in the couch Looking like cookie monster flossing his mouth Find me cooling on the corner sippin' light beer foam You can tell by my turtle neck and chain that I bone Turtle neck light beer and a thin ass chain And that's it Turtle neck light beer and a thin ass chain And that's it The rabbit kick the bucket Dogg said fuck it Get my two step on with my turtle neck on Thin ass chain light beer in my glass Smacking that bitches, the ones with the ass Girl you know it's true tell me what it do Oh you like my style say you like my crew Say you wanna be under my chest This turtle neck is like one of my best Say you wanna be under my chest This turtle neck is like one of my best So I guess yo dress no stress Staying fresh is my vendetta I'm a crook so my look On my game go getta The phatter, the puffier, the fluffier, The bigger the turtle neck the more gangsta it is Turtle neck and chain Turtle neck and chain Turtle neck and chain Sippin' on a light beer Turtle neck and chain Turtle neck and chain Turtle neck and chain Sippin' on a light beer |
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2:27 |
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from The Lonely Island 2집 - Turtleneck & Chain (2011)
Yeaahh, ay, ay, ay, ay, ay, ay
We at it again, everybody now Hands in the air, its a stick up, stick up no funny business or you get lit up, lit up You test I (I), you gon' die (die) And at your funeral ya mama gon' cry So customers kiss the floor, floor And clerks open cash drawers slow, slow If you don't wanna end up dead You'll do everything Shy Ronnie says Tell 'em, Ronnie! No one in the bank can hear you Shy Ronnie, use your outside voice We don't have time for this Let's go So stay on the ground its a stick up, stick up Your wallets and jewels we'll pick up, pick up Unload the cash (cash), move your ass (ass) We gettin' money, tell 'em Shy Ronnie Please, please use your words Just imagine that everyone's naked Uh, oh! Boner alert. He really pictured them naked. The police are on their way (Come out with your hands up) Good luck, Shy Ronnie Bye, bye! HA-HAA! Ronnie motherfucker and I'm back from the dead, Brain bored with the murder, so I shot my own leg Don't get the name twisted, cause I'm crazy as shit I hung a giant ass noose off my giant ass dick Aye! I forgot this money And also this guy Come on, we're gonna have sex Too-da-loo! And you can hang from it Cause you don't wanna see my real gun Shots to the sky but your face sound real fun! Ronnie! |
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2:10 |
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from The Lonely Island 2집 - Turtleneck & Chain (2011)
Yea let's do this
Take a good look at me, you need a bad guy like me All I have in this world is my balls and my work, and I don't break em for no one Yo hopped out the whip, popped the heater out the glove-y Ski-masked it up, bout to jack these fools, love me Blasted through the door, blazing hell with the shells flyin, Spiderwebbed the flat screen in one shot, babies crying Got these bitches nose bloody, face down in the shag This bitch is flippin - Shut the fuck up and fill the bag All of a sudden - BOOM, shots from the back room It was a set up, dude yellin "Gettin' fed up!" Yo we bust out the back, dookie flyin outta my pants You got the keys, yea boy now make that engine dance This shit is stallin, fuck man they strapped up Lets make a brake for it to the crib or the backup We hit the pavement, dookie bustin all out of my jeans You hop the fence, so we can get away clean We hit the dirt, this rottweiler snarlin and smilin He ripped my pantleg off, a bunch of dookies went flyin I had to blast, dog brains all in the grass Mixed with the dookie, yeah man nighty night! Time to smash Yo we cut through the park, dookies poppin outta my shirt A hail of bullets from behind, like lead fireworks Dookie fillin up my sneaks bought to bust, No doubt Pulled off a Isotoner glove, shook the dookies out Yo it's a chase, they want us to be chased Yo duck over here, I gotta ditch some dead dookie weight Whipped off my stunning? so I could dump the dookie Cop blazin out the eucalyptus tryin to shoot me I blew out his back, that's all she wrote man Yeah, now his chest slapped two dookies for the boatman They comin man, quick throw these dookies in the trash Hold up more dookie, they comin out fast Yo I can't move my leg, cause I'm stuck on dookie mountain Fifty guns open fire, blood spray like a fountain Now our bodies all shredded, shots blaze right through me We're done-er than done, done in by the dookie Trouble on Dookie Island |
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0:30 | 
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| from The Lonely Island 2집 - Turtleneck & Chain (2011) | |||||
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2:50 |
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from The Lonely Island 2집 - Turtleneck & Chain (2011)
Oh damn…
이런 젠장 What is it dawg? 왜 그래 친구 I forgot it’s Mother’s Day. 어머니의 날인 걸 깜빡했네 Didn’t get a gift for her. 선물 준비 못했어? Other plans got in the way. 다른 일들이 있었어 She’ll be so dissappointed. 어머니께서 무척 실망하실텐데 Damn I forgot it too. 젠장 나도 깜빡했어 This could have been avoided. 챙겨드릴 수 있었는데 Both: What the hell are we gonna do? 대체 어떻게 해야 되지? My mom’s been so forlorn 울 엄만 너무 외로우셔 ever since my daddy left. 아버지가 돌아가시고 난 뒤부터 COLD. 저런 No one to hold her tight, 지탱해 줄 사람이 없으셔 life has put her to the test. 삶이 시험의 연속이지 I know just what you mean, 무슨 말인 지 알겠다. my mom’s been so sad and gray. 우리 어머니도 슬프고 우울하시지. Word. 왜? My dad can’t satisfy her in the bedroom ever since he passed away. 아버지가 돌아가신 후로 침대에서 만족할 수 없기 때문이지 Both: Hold up. 잠깐 You thinkin’ what I’m thinkin’? 너도 지금 그 생각하냐? I’m thinkin’ I’m thinkin’ too. 나도 지금 그 생각하는 것 같군 Both: Slow up. 서두르지 마 What time is it dawg? 지금이 몇 시지 친구? It’s time for a switcharoo. 스와핑할 시간이지 Both: We both love our moms, 우리 모두 엄마를 사랑하지 women with grown women needs. 욕구불만이 쌓여가는 엄마를 I say we break ‘em off, 감동시켜 버리자 show ‘em how much they really mean… 얼마나 소중한 분인지 알게 해드리자구 ’cause I’m a Mother Lover, 왜냐면 나는 Mother Lover you’re a Mother Lover. 너도 Mother Lover We should fuck each other’s mothers. 서로의 엄마에게 박아드리자꾸나 Fuck each other’s moms… 박아 드리자꾸나~♪ I’ll push in that place where you came out as a baby. 니가 태어난 구멍으로 밀어 넣어 드릴거야. Ain’t no doubt that shit is crazy. 미친 게 분명하지 Fuck each others moms… 박아 드리자꾸나~♪ Both: ’Cause every Mother’s Day needs a Mother’s Night. 모든 어머니들은 그들을 위한 밤이 필요하지 If doing it is wrong, I don’t wanna be right. 미쳤다고 손가락질 해도 난 상관없어 I’m callin’ on you ’cause I can’t do it myself. 너에게 부탁하지. 왜냐면 내가 할 순 없으니까 To me you’re like a brother, 넌 나에게 형제나 다름없지 so be my mother lover. 그러니 나의 Mother Lover가 되줘 I’m layin’ in the cut waitin’ for your mom, 너희 엄말 기다리며 만반의 준비를 했지 clutchin’ on this lube and roses. 윤활제와 장미다발을 들고 기다리고 있지 I got my digital camera, 난 디카를 준비했지 I’m gonna make your momma do a million poses. 너희 엄마를 다양한 포즈로 찍어주지 They will be so surprised. 꽤 많이 놀라실 거야 We are so cool and thoughtful. 우린 너무 쿨하고 자상한 듯 Can’t wait to pork your mom. 더 이상 기다릴 수 없어 I’m gonna be the syrup, she can be my waffle. 나는 달콤한 시럽, 너희 엄만 나의 와플 Both: Show’d up Show’d up~♪ My mother loves bubble bath with chamomile. 울 엄만 케모마일 거품 목욕을 좋아하시지 Both: Straight up. Straight up~♪ Give it to my mom d-d-d-d-d-doggystyle. 울 엄마한테는 뒤 뒤 뒤 뒤 뒷치기로 해드려 Both: This is the perfect plan for a perfect Mother’s Day. 완벽한 어머니의 날을 위한 완벽한 계획이지 They’ll have to rename this one 이 날의 이름을 바꿔야겠군 All Up Under The Covers Day. 이불 속의 날로 말야 ‘Cause I’m a Mother Lover, 왜냐면 나는 Mother Lover you’re a Mother Lover. 너도 Motehr Lover We should fuck each others mothers. 서로의 엄마에게 박아드리자꾸나 Fuck each others moms… 박아드리자꾸나~♪ I’ll push in that place where you came out as a baby, 니가 태어난 구멍으로 밀어 넣어 드릴거야 ain’t no doubt that shit is crazy… 미친 게 분명하지 Fuck each others moms… 박아드리자꾸나~♪ Break it down… Break it down It would be my honor to be your new stepfather 너의 새아버지가 되는 걸 영광으로 생각하네 It would be my honor to be your new stepfather. 너의 새아버지가 되는 걸 영광으로 생각하네~♪ I’ll let you do my mother, 울 엄마는 너에게 맡길테니 make me another brother… 동생이나 하나 만들어주렴 And while I’m in your mother, 그리고 너의 엄마와 있을 댄 I’ll never use a rubber. 콘돔은 절대 쓰지 않겠네 OH! OH! ’Cause every Mother’s Day needs a Mother’s Night. 모든 어머니들은 그들을 위한 밤이 필요하지 If doing it is wrong, I don’t wanna be right. 미쳤다고 손가락질해도 난 상관없어 I’m callin’ on you ’cause I can’t do it myself. 너에게 부탁하지. 왜냐면 내가 할 순 없으니까 To me you’re like a brother, 넌 나에게 형제나 다름없지 so be my mother lover. 그러니 나의 Mother Lover가 되줘 They blessed us both with the gift of life. 우리에게 삶이란 큰 선물을 주신 분들이야 She brought you in this world so I’m a sex her right. 널 세상에 나오게 한 분이시니 제대로 해드리지 This is the second best idea that we’ve ever had. 우리가 한 생각 중 두 번째로 좋은 생각인 듯~♪ The choice can be no other. 다른 선택은 할 필요도 없지 Be my mother lover. 나의 Mother Lover가 되줘 Happy Mother’s Day… Happy Mother’s Day |
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from The Lonely Island 2집 - Turtleneck & Chain (2011)
When you're out at a club
and you see a fly girl do the creep and do the creep And if you wanna make friends at the ATM Do the creep And do the creep Well we got a new dance so get up on your feet It's real easy to do and it's called the creep Let your hands flop round like a marionette Pop your knees up and down sh sh shakin' your neck Now pull your waistband up like you expecting a flood And stick your hair down flat like it was covered in mud Trim up your pencil mustache and pop them peepers Put this in your speakers you a certified creeper When you see a country bitch laying out at the beach Do the creep And do the creep And when a fine PYT walks in front of your tree do the creep And do the creep I was six years old when I started creeping My parents took it to their room and I started peeping you can imagine their surprise when they lifted their heads And saw my little ass creeping at the foot of the bed And they knew I was a creep since the day I was born Get popping out of momma like some chemical And the doctor saw my head and he starting freaking Cause I came clean and I came out creeping Nicki Nicki Nicki Nicki Nicki Nicki When I was a girl I creeped in the boys locker room Hide deep inside it was my little creep stalker room As they disrobed I was oogling and oggling Little did they know that for me they was modelling And I would laugh ha ha ha ha ha ha ha And they would dance la la la la la la la laaa So pop pop pop your peepers and turn out your sneakers Don't sleep come and get ya creep on with me Go get ya sweating off ya bride at her wedding do the creep And do the creep But when you sneek into a wake and you see a beefcake Do the creep And do the creep When the judge is a hottie and you can't control ya body Do the creep And do the creep So get ya knees flexin' and your arms T rexin' Do the creep And do the creep And don't forget to smile |
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| from The Lonely Island 2집 - Turtleneck & Chain (2011) | |||||
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from The Lonely Island 2집 - Turtleneck & Chain (2011)
I was walkin' through the city streets
And a man walks up to me, and hands me the latest energy drink "Run faster, jump higher" Man! I'm not gonna let you poison me I threw it on the ground You must think I'm a joke I ain't gonna be part of your system Man! Pump that garbage in another man's veins I go to my favorite hot dog stand And the dude says, "You come here all the time. Here's one for free." I said, "Man! What I look like? A charity case?" I took it, and threw it on the ground I don't need your handouts I'm an adult Please! You can't buy me a hot dog, man! At the farmer's market with my so-called girlfriend She hands me her cell phone, says it's my dad Man! this ain't my dad This is a cell phone I threw it on the ground What, you think I'm stupid? I'm not a part of your system My dad's not a phone DUH! Some poser hands me cake at a birthday party Whatcha want me to do with this? Eat it? Happy birthday to the ground I threw the rest of the cake, too Welcome to the real word, jackass! So many things to throw on the ground Like this, and this, and that, and even this I'm an adult Two Hollywood phonies try to give me their autograph Ground! Nobody wants your autograph, phonies! Then the two phonies got up Turned out they had a taser And they tased me in the butthole I fell to the ground The phonies didn't let up Tasin' on my butthole over and over I was screamin' and squirmin' My butthole was on fire The moral of the story is You can't trust the system Man! |
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from The Lonely Island 2집 - Turtleneck & Chain (2011)
Whoa!
I can't believe we're in Japan! Look at all the lights! The food! The people! Wow! We're three cool white friends in Japan (Japan!) We've never been to Japan So we wrote a song about the three of us in Japan And our label has to pay for it Here we are at our five star hotel The one from LOST IN TRANSLATION (In Japan!) The views are amazing And their champagne waiting Because that's how we wrote it (Yummy!) And now the label has to pay for the video (yay!) And pay for everything that we say (no matter what!) For example I'll be getting a massage right now And I'll be drinking some sake (So expensive!) (Who cares?) Here we are at the most expensive sushi restaurant in Japan (mmm!) And now we're at Tokyo Disneyland And now we're in Hawaii for one random shot that our label has to pay for! Cause we're three cool white friends in Japan (In Asia!) The fact that we're white isn't why we're friends But we are white, and we're friends (In Japan) At this point in the video we'll be super drunk (WEEEE!) Standing near some kind of Dragon And then we'll buy some stinky used girls panties Out of one of those pervert vending machines Now we've seen sumo wrestling live Unless we get dropped by our label Cause we're three white douchebags in Japan (That's us!) It's all part of our master plan To get some much needed R&R At the expense of Universal Records Wow Look at all this Japanese money It's called Yen I heard it's worth more than American money Let's dump it in the river! (phone rings) Moshi Moshi Guys it's the label This video's really expensive and- BYE!! Pokemon! Dump it in the River! Our rental car! Dump it in the River! This old guy! Dump him in the river! And now we're flying home first class! |
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from The Lonely Island 2집 - Turtleneck & Chain (2011)
[ANDY SAMBERG]
After the club is the after party After the party is the hotel lobby After that, you know it’s diamond Cris And after that, I say, “Excuse me, miss” And after that, we goin’ back to the room And after that, she’s gonna leave real soon And after that, I crack one more beer And after that, I just stare in the mirror And after that, I start freakin’ out What the hell am I doing with my life? Call up my mom and get my cry on I order room service, get my apple pie on And after that, I just walk the streets A homeless dude throws up on my feet And I see just how pointless life is Full on existential crisis Tear off my clothes and scream at the sky Fall to my knees and ask God, “why?” [SANTIGOLD] This nightlife is killing me I think I’m losing my mind I yearn to fly, yet I sink Stalling tears is my dream [ANDY SAMBERG] After that, I drive into the hills And trade my car for a bottle of pills And after that, I’m on a vision quest Put my mind, body, and spirit to the test And after that, I meet my totem spirit It’s a rattlesnake, so I have to kill it Then I drink all his blood and steal his powers Slither around in the dirt for hours And after that I start jerking off Up on a mountain, jerking off Down by the river, jerking off And that’s when I have my epiphany You can’t spend your whole life jerking off And after that, I’m going back to the city [SANTIGOLD] This nightlife is killing me No more jerking off Fate only knows what’s in store Stalling tears for me, no more [ANDY SAMBERG] And after that, I clean up my life Join AA to make it right And after that, I get my thirty day chip And after that, I go sell a bit And after that, I’m a whole new man Brew complimentary in my hybrid van I give my life to meditation Then sleep with a whore at a Greyhound station And after that, I have a full relapse Then lose my hand in a game of craps And after that, everyone calls me Claw And after that, I work for Tim McGraw (Hey!) And after that, I pass out in a sewer Meet a giant fish, fuck his brains out And after, that I’m filled with shame No one but myself to blame Nothing in my heart but pain And next week we’re gonna do it again! [SANTIGOLD] This nightlife carves hooks in me I’m back to jerking off I tried but could not break free Stalling tears return to me Started in the club Then he moved to the Hills Really freaked out and drank snake blood Got himself clean Now back in the club And that’s where I’ve been in this song But it’s stalling tears This playboy life’s too much for me [ANDY SAMBERG] After the club is the after party After the party is the hotel lobby Stuck in a cycle I just can’t win And after that, it all happens again |
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from The Lonely Island 2집 - Turtleneck & Chain (2011)
Dude you're pretty swoll have you been working out?
Uh yeah, why are you looking? Oh no, not like that man, I mean, no homo. Ohhh no homo. Cool When you want to compliment a friend (no homo) But you don't want that friendship to end (no homo) So tell a dude just how you feel (no homo) Say 'no homo' so he knows the deal (no homo) Hey yo man you got a fresh style (no homo) And you know you got the best smile (no homo) Your girlfriend is a lucky lady (no homo) But your looks would make a handsome baby (no homo) I like the way your shoulders fill out that shirt (no homo) It's hard to pull off but you make it work (no homo) Hey yo I kinda like your natural scent (no homo) Hey yo I kinda like the musical Rent (no homo) Man I cant decide who wore it best (no homo) But I'm feeling Diane Keaton's vest (no homo) I admit it I'm a fashionista (no homo) and I know every line of Mystic Pizza (no homo) and yo damn this rose is something special (no homo) damn we should goof around and wrestle (no homo) lets hit the hot tub and take a dump (no homo) we're all friends ain't no room for trunks (no homo) Yeah man I'm really feeling buzzed right now (no homo) Are you really feeling buzzed right now? (no homo) Yo we should watch this gay porno tape (no homo) but as a joke because we're all straight (no homo) man you could wash laundry on those abs (no homo) Yo I think girls look good in drag (no homo) Hey yo I've been thinking about posing nude (no homo) Hey yo I've been thinking about fuckin a dude (no homo) Or we could 3-way 69 (no homo) Or human centipede in a line (no homo) Or some docking could be hella fun (no homo) Or yeah man I could do this one (no homo) Hey yo no homo but I wanna dress up like Dorothy and butt fuck a dude while he 69s Morrissey Yeah no homo but I wish I lived in Ancient Greece to gave young socrates the illful release Hey no homo but today I'm coming out the closet and I scream it from the mountains like a gay prophet those two words have set me free (no homo) damn it feels good to be (no homo) |
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from The Lonely Island 2집 - Turtleneck & Chain (2011)
Dude you're pretty swoll have you been working out?
Uh yeah, why are you looking? Oh no, not like that man, I mean, no homo. Ohhh no homo. Cool When you want to compliment a friend (no homo) But you don't want that friendship to end (no homo) So tell a dude just how you feel (no homo) Say 'no homo' so he knows the deal (no homo) Hey yo man you got a fresh style (no homo) And you know you got the best smile (no homo) Your girlfriend is a lucky lady (no homo) But your looks would make a handsome baby (no homo) I like the way your shoulders fill out that shirt (no homo) It's hard to pull off but you make it work (no homo) Hey yo I kinda like your natural scent (no homo) Hey yo I kinda like the musical Rent (no homo) Man I cant decide who wore it best (no homo) But I'm feeling Diane Keaton's vest (no homo) I admit it I'm a fashionista (no homo) and I know every line of Mystic Pizza (no homo) and yo damn this rose is something special (no homo) damn we should goof around and wrestle (no homo) lets hit the hot tub and take a dump (no homo) we're all friends ain't no room for trunks (no homo) Yeah man I'm really feeling buzzed right now (no homo) Are you really feeling buzzed right now? (no homo) Yo we should watch this gay porno tape (no homo) but as a joke because we're all straight (no homo) man you could wash laundry on those abs (no homo) Yo I think girls look good in drag (no homo) Hey yo I've been thinking about posing nude (no homo) Hey yo I've been thinking about fuckin a dude (no homo) Or we could 3-way 69 (no homo) Or human centipede in a line (no homo) Or some docking could be hella fun (no homo) Or yeah man I could do this one (no homo) Hey yo no homo but I wanna dress up like Dorothy and butt fuck a dude while he 69s Morrissey Yeah no homo but I wish I lived in Ancient Greece to gave young socrates the illful release Hey no homo but today I'm coming out the closet and I scream it from the mountains like a gay prophet those two words have set me free (no homo) damn it feels good to be (no homo) |
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from The Lonely Island - Turtleneck & Chain [single] (2011)
Turtle neck and chain
Turtle neck and chain Turtle neck and chain Sippin' on a light beer My turtle neck phat and my chain so thin And I'm sippin' light beer and my crew right here Chain razor thin, light beer in my cup And my sweater on turtle with the neck on puff Huge turtle neck and my chain so skinny Beer light all night stand up get dizzy Light cup beer drink thin so chain neck turtle phat man I won't say it again Turtle neck and chain Turtle neck and chain Turtle neck and chain Sippin' on a light beer Turtle neck check with another on deck 'Case I spill something on it Like some light beer? Yes We be bragging 'bout who's chain the thinnest Turtle neck thicker than Delta Burke swimming in the guiness Now musicjuzz.blogspot.com bare with me What they can't see my chain Metal so thin it dissolve when it rain Got more chain than the snow patrol Every one razor thin like an insect's stripper pole Turtle neck and chain Turtle neck and chain Turtle neck and chain Sippin' on a light beer Chain so light when the police roll by Man it flow Man it flow And my beer so light you can see right through it like a ghost And I also wear turtle necks Sweaters while I wing my chain like it's stuck in the couch Looking like cookie monster flossing his mouth Find me cooling on the corner sippin' light beer foam You can tell by my turtle neck and chain that I bone Turtle neck light beer and a thin ass chain And that's it Turtle neck light beer and a thin ass chain And that's it The rabbit kick the bucket Dogg said fuck it Get my two step on with my turtle neck on Thin ass chain light beer in my glass Smacking that bitches, the ones with the ass Girl you know it's true tell me what it do Oh you like my style say you like my crew Say you wanna be under my chest This turtle neck is like one of my best Say you wanna be under my chest This turtle neck is like one of my best So I guess yo dress no stress Staying fresh is my vendetta I'm a crook so my look On my game go getta The phatter, the puffier, the fluffier, The bigger the turtle neck the more gangsta it is Turtle neck and chain Turtle neck and chain Turtle neck and chain Sippin' on a light beer Turtle neck and chain Turtle neck and chain Turtle neck and chain Sippin' on a light beer |
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from The Lonely Island - 3-Way (The Golden Rule) [single] (2011)
to moonn6pence from papayeverte
Yeah Backin' that ass Your mom says "Hi" — Jinx! Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah Yeah yeah yeah no no A-yeah-yeah-yeah A-yeah-yeah-yeah A-yeah-yeah-yeah Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah - Jam! Summertime in the city And everybody's having sex You know I just got a page from a girl That I met last week at the Pay-less Shoe stores I also have a cutie to call who loves the way I knock on her boots Well it's time to mac Let's handle that In two-to-six hours, We'll meet back here and regroup Now let's shoop Roll up to her crib with some Bartles & James Hop off the bus with the Alizé Now hold up player, whatchu diggity-doing here? I should diggity-ask you the same And she sang Hey, boys I want you both I hope that you think that's cool (Say word?) I know most guys won't freak together She forgot about the golden rule — a huh huh It's OK when it's in a three-way It's not gay when it's in a three-way With a honey in the middle there's some leeway The area's grey in a one, two, three-way Normally, I don't get down with dudes But tonight is a special exception (Great) See you're my best friend Through thick and thin Now it's time to make a triple connection Lights off Here in the dark (Here in the dark) It's so hard to tell (So hard to tell) Where her body ends (La la) And my homie's begins (Ew wee) This rule dates back (The Golden Rule) To ancient Greece (Talkin' about Caesar) We're two Jack Trippers and a Chrissy The new Three's Company It's OK when it's in a three-way It's not gay when it's in a three-way With a honey in the middle there's some leeway The area's grey in a one, two, three-way Fellas. Get ready. To impress a chick, Helicopter dick, go! Helicopter dick Helicopter dick To impress a chick Do the helicopter dick Wow And all of that was OK Cause it was in a three-way It's quite clear when you see the instant replay (boom) Maybe two is enough That's what they'll say But we'll say, "Hell no!" One, two, three-way Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah The golden rule 가사작성papayeverte |
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| from The Lonely Island, Cele - Engroovao [ep] (2018) | |||||
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| from The Lonely Island, Cele - Engroovao [ep] (2018) | |||||
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| from The Lonely Island, Cele - Engroovao [ep] (2018) | |||||
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| from The Lonely Island, Cele - Engroovao [ep] (2018) | |||||
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